Symphony Character Adoption Agency - CD + OPEN! :)

[SabrinaB]

Username: SabjeBammie
Kennel that you are applying for: 35
Preferred critic: Anyone
What do you wish to get out of this critique?: Grammar check mostly And if I need to add anything
Link to form: viewtopic.php?f=58&t=1379673&p=80335121#p80335121
plzcritiquemeomgguiz

[Wesley]

Username: SabjeBammie
Kennel that you are applying for: 35
Preferred critic: Anyone
What do you wish to get out of this critique?: Grammar check mostly And if I need to add anything
Link to form: viewtopic.php?f=58&t=1379673&p=80335121#p80335121
plzcritiquemeomgguiz

I can do this one soon <3

[koushi.]

Username: » Asterous «
Kennel that you are applying for: #16
Preferred critic : anybody will be fine with me :3
What do you wish to get out of this critique? : anything that can do to improve my form overall and have better chances at winning the charector.
How harsh should we be on you? : As harsh as you see fit.
Link to form: XxX
plzcritiquemeomgguiz

[SabrinaB]

Username: » Asterous «
Kennel that you are applying for: #16
Preferred critic : anybody will be fine with me :3
What do you wish to get out of this critique? : anything that can do to improve my form overall and have better chances at winning the charector.
How harsh should we be on you? : As harsh as you see fit.
Link to form: XxX
plzcritiquemeomgguiz

I'll take a look for you and send it over soon

[kafka]

● usernamemmmm riptide ;
● kennel no.mmmn #110
● usemmmmmmmQ I, riptide ;, promise to love and cherish this gorgeous character. I will order art, write stories, and develop its character whenever possible. I will roleplay them, find friends, enemies and perhaps even love interests for them. If for whatever reason I find that I no longer have time for this character, I will either re-donate it to the SCAA in hopes that it will find another home, or gift it to a friend (with express permission, of course). However, I doubt that it will come to that as I feel a strong connection with this beautiful character.

● namemmmmQmm Kotori, a Japanese bird of luck. Pronounced [ koh - TOH - ree ]
● gendermmmmmm Kotori is a [tomboyish] female.
● ageQQQmmQQmn The exact number's a secret, but Kotori is still an adolescent.
● birthdaymmmmm It doesn't matter; Kotori herself can't remember anymore.
● speciesmmmmmll She is a rare lion-tailed snow leopard.
● nationalitymmmm Norwegian blood runs through Kotori's veins.
● orientationmmml Kotori is an aromantic pansexual. She only believes in platonic relationships.
● buildmmmmmmm She is of small yet strong build.






● independentmmlm Kotori is a solitary soldier, who not only doesn't need the assistance of others, but rather avoids it.
● kind-heartedmmm She is caring and cannot bear to leave anyone behind. She's a softie on the inside and likes to keep this from leaking out of her hard exterior.
● intelligentmmmnm Kotori is extremely intelligent and likes to work things out for herself. She loves hands-on learning experiences and often seeks to discover more than what's written in books.
● groundedmmmmm Kotori is extremely sensible. She draws a big, bold line between what is realistic and what is just a silly fantasy.
● determinedmmmm She seldom gives up and perseveres through every task.


● kotori lovesmmmm collecting things, small trinkets, travelling, helping others, discovering new herbs and plants, vintage things and ancient artifacts, being alone, birds, reading and the sky.
● kotori despisesmmn feeling weak, war, disease, not knowing, forgetfulness, mess and disorder, humans, being interrupted, thunderstorms and bees.

● random factsmmmm Kotori can't sleep with silence - she yearns for the sound of birdsong to sing her a lullaby.
● random factsmmmm She has a fear of being buried alive.
● random factsmmmm Her favourite bird is the exotic hummingbird.
● random factsmmmm Her favourite colour is sky blue.
● random factsmmmm She likes to sing with the birds when noone's around.







● historymmmmmn. "Rosemary, holy basil, burdock root..." Kotori hummed to herself as she pranced about the herb garden, carefully inspecting the small row of saplings before her. She eyed a small, lucid green plant before her, before gingerly plucking it out of the ground with her teeth. Fumbling with her paws, she opened her sachet and dropped it inside, satisfied.

"There! That's all I need for my potion," she mumbled proudly to herself. Kotori had always been interested in medicine and herbal remedies, constantly trying to expand her knowledge on antidotes for poisons and plant types. She dreamed of travelling the world, being able to heal all with her natural treatment. She was currently attempting to use a variety of herbs to help a small cut on her paw heal faster. Just as she approached another clump of leaves, a sharp voice sliced through the air.

"You again!" The words with spat out with a harsh tone. Kotori whipped around, surprised. Usually the old lady who owned the herb garden would be taking her evening nap at this time! What was she doing outside?

"You mangly beast, always stealing from my garden! You never learn, do you?" The lady was ancient, her back hunched, clad in a hideous floral dressing gown and fluffy tartan slippers. She gripped a gnarled, wooden walking stick in one hand, her movements mechanical and robotic. She hobbled towards Kotori, her sour face scrunched up like a weather map. Kotori picked up her sachet in her mouth, ready to make an easy escape.

"Not this time, filthy dog!"

All of a sudden, she raised her walking stick, waving it over Kotori's head in a swift motion. Some powder, which Kotori had not seen in her fist, was scattered over her back and tail. Immediately, a sharp pain seared through the canine's shoulderblades and she clenched her teeth, wincing as the burning sensation overtook her entire body. Blood like white-hot iron pulsing through her veins and Kotori opened her eyes as the pain subsided. The old lady was shuffling back toward her cottage, a triumphant smirk on her face.

Kotori looked around, feeling woozy and light-headed. Why was everything so far below on the ground? The sachet of herbs, still inbetween her teeth, suddenly seemed a lot bigger and heavier. Her front legs ached, strangely exhausted. And that was when she realised. She had been turned into a bird.

Paralysed with shock, Kotori's wings failed for a split second, causing her to suddenly plummet towards the ground. Quickly regaining consciousness, she fanned out her two lengths of gleaming feathered muscle just before she hit the ground. After vigorously flapping to keep herself up, she managed to land on a nearby shrub. Questions clouded her mind. What was she supposed to do? She glanced at plume of brawny sheen that erupted from her chest and sighed. There was no way out of it. She would just have to deal with it. Blinking back tears, Kotori nipped up her bundle of herbs and took off.



● ● ●



A scream of pain echoed through the forest. Kotori's eyes opened and she wearily sat up in her nest. She breathed in the early morning petrichor, yawning as rays of dappled sunlight pooled through the rich green canopy. The person cried out again, startling Kotori. She ruffled her feathers, vexed, before soaring up above the roof of leaves to find out where the noise was coming from.

The sky curved over her head as she flew up to meet a flock of similarly curious sparrows. She cocked her head at them, as if to ask, "Do you know what that awful sound is?" The small but brisk movements of the sparrows' wings told her no. Thanking them with the grand wave of her wing, she swooped down closer to the forest, the tips of her wings brushing against dew encrusted leaves.

A dove soon joined her, its pure white attire clashing against the shades of woodland jade. She could tell by the jagged, quivering motions of its body that it was scared, and quite possibly injured. Dipping under the snow white bird, Kotori spread her wings as far as she could as a protective gesture so the dove would trust her, and began guiding the other bird to her nest.

They settled down, the dove still anxious and alert, and Kotori nimbly used her beak to sift through her stash of beneficial herbs. After finding a piece of a small, rough-edged leaf, she gently rubbed the sap oozing from it onto the right leg of the dove. The dove waited patiently, calming down. Just as she finished treating it, Kotori heard the yell again. She gathered most of her herbs and remedies, ready to serve. Her head perked up and she listened intently for a follow-up, before swiftly taking flight once more.

The whisp of the shout that she had grasped was taking her out of the forest and across a familiar plain. Soldiering on, she tirelessly worked to reach the source of the screech. When she arrived on the other side of the field, the sight brought a slaughtering wave of nostalgia, laced with a burning hatred. It was the cottage of the old lady who had turned Kotori into a bird half a decade ago.

Kotori turned back, fuming after flying all the way here for nothing. But just as she was airborne, the howl of pain pierced the air again. Kotori hesitated. Healing others and tending to their wounds was her duty. No matter what. With a clear mind, she flew in through the open window, medicines still clamped between her teeth.

The old lady flinched at her presence. "You're back," she said meekly, sprawled across the floor. She was clutching her stomach as if the devil itself had possessed it. "For revenge, I presume?"

Kotori leapt down ignoring her words. A part of her was impressed the woman had remembered her. Another was strictly professional and a little mad.

"What happened?" she asked bluntly, sorting through her bag. The lady watched her, eyes bulging in amazement.

"I ate some kind of poisonous seed by accident," she explained weakly. Her hands tightened around her middle and she groaned, her eyes rolling up their sockets. The gears in Kotori's mind whirred as she thought of the most common toxic plants.

"Horse-chestnut seeds? Doll's eyes seeds? What did it look like?" Kotori spoke quickly. English felt strange on her tongue since she hadn't the need for it the last five years, thanks to a certain somebody.

"It was red, with a black dot," the old hag stuttered. Her head lolled to the side. Kotori gasped. She recognised the description - the rosary pea was a dangerous seed that could kill an adult human just by ingesting one. It contained abrin, a highly potent plant protein. Knowing that the woman didn't have long left, Kotori sprung into work.

Her feathers were slicked with sweat as she tried to concentrate on creating an antidote. She had never faced such a challenge before and the pressure of pulling on someone's lifeline was weighing her down. Kotori wove strings of herbs together, smashed leaves into a pulp, all the while hoping that these were the appropriate ingredients. A dash of this, the stalk of that, exactly three and a half of that berry should be enough...

After an intense few minutes, Kotori bundled her makeshift medicine in a leaf and let it slowly drip into the now-silent old lady's mouth. She held her breath as the concoction dripped down her throat. Listening for any signs of improvement, she hovered over the ancient human's body. She seemed completely still.

Suddenly, the woman's chest began rising and falling, peaceful. Kotori relaxed as her patient fell into a dreamless sleep. She was alright for now, but it would be a wise move to watch over her for the night. With that thought in mind, the bird soundlessly escaped and hid in the tree where she surveyed her work through the window.

When the sun rose, Kotori was still camouflaged in the gnarled oak tree. She stretched her wings, praising herself for making it through the night. Ducking back into the house, she chirped sharply at the lady, willing her to wake up. As her patient began to stir, she checked her physical state.

The colour had drained back to the old lady's face and any pains she had before had subdued. Her pulse was regular again. Her eyes fluttered open and she stared at Kotori for the longest time.

"Thank-" she began, but Kotori cut her off.

"You need to rest for the next few days," she commanded her, flying over to the sofa. The woman helped herself up with a walking stick, slumping down on the couch.

"I'm sure you can take care of yourself now," Kotori said firmly. "I'll be going."

But before she could make a dramatic exit, the woman grabbed her walking stick and pointed it straight at her. And then Kotori felt as if her entire body was on fire.

At first she thought that the old lady had struck her, and anger flooded her mind. How could she after she had saved her life? But then she realised her body was changing, and the agonising process of a metamorphosis was taking place.

When the affliction had faded, Kotori was no longer a bird. Her previous feline body had returned, taking a mixture of dismay and frustration with it.

"You're welcome," the old lady whispered smugly.

"You're welcome?" Kotori roared. She whipped around and began gathering her herbs, irate.

"Isn't this what you've wanted all along?" The old woman asked, bemused.

Kotori thought about the last five years of her life. About how she had learned to live with the birds, healing them, being able to tell their thoughts and emotions from just the flutter of a feather. About how they had welcomed her into their world. She struggled to open the door and faced the outside world, determined not to let the old hag see her choking back tears.

"I belong somewhere else."

Kotori the bird whisperer gazed at the sky, before fleeing on four feet.









Thank you for this chance x
riptide ;

theresasnakeinmyboot

[Dylan Klebold]

Username: Tadashi Hamada
Kennel that you are applying for: 152
Preferred critic: Anyone, as long as they let me know first.
What do you wish to get out of this critique?: Just a general critique
Link to form: viewtopic.php?f=58&t=1379673&start=3460#p81534409
plzcritiquemeomgguiz

[SabrinaB]

Username: Tadashi Hamada
Kennel that you are applying for: 152
Preferred critic: Anyone, as long as they let me know first.
What do you wish to get out of this critique?: Just a general critique
Link to form: viewtopic.php?f=58&t=1379673&start=3460#p81534409
plzcritiquemeomgguiz

I can do it if you allow PMs

[serl]

Username:vibrant,
Kennel that you are applying for: 100, 278, 139, 30, 143
Preferred critic [any judge, sub-judge, or crit staff including myself is a valid request for critic. Please put 'any judge/subjudge' or something along those lines in this section if you do not have a preference]:Sub Judge please.
What do you wish to get out of this critique? [What do you want us to let you know? How can we help you improve your form? Would you like advice on the contents, the length, the name of the character? How harsh should we be on you?]:How can I improve?
Link to form:100 278 139 30 143
plzcritiquemeomgguiz
ah nope it was 5 rounds xmas.

[SabrinaB]

Username:vibrant,
Kennel that you are applying for: 100, 278, 139, 30, 143
Preferred critic [any judge, sub-judge, or crit staff including myself is a valid request for critic. Please put 'any judge/subjudge' or something along those lines in this section if you do not have a preference]:Sub Judge please.
What do you wish to get out of this critique? [What do you want us to let you know? How can we help you improve your form? Would you like advice on the contents, the length, the name of the character? How harsh should we be on you?]:How can I improve?
Link to form:100 278 139 30 143
plzcritiquemeomgguiz
I did these in seperate rounds I believe, if I'm wrong I'm really sorry.
So 3 or 2 or 1 should be in a different round not sure...

I'll send one after dinner
Kennel 278 links me to the form of kennel 100

[Rabbit]

Sending critiques out soon <3