Forever and Never... Please comment and critique!

[dapperblook]

Rolly-chan: You are absolutely correct. Add all of that to the fact that I cannot write more than a few pages without losing interest in a story and this would not have ended well anyway. I am going to take the first bit and elaborate, make it more detailed on why it was such a shock that they ended up together. Thank you for pointing out my errors. I am not the best at writing longer stories, as my preference is a short story with a plethora of details that really make it a good story. Again, thank you for helping me.

[Rolly-chan]

Rolly-chan: You are absolutely correct. Add all of that to the fact that I cannot write more than a few pages without losing interest in a story and this would not have ended well anyway. I am going to take the first bit and elaborate, make it more detailed on why it was such a shock that they ended up together. Thank you for pointing out my errors. I am not the best at writing longer stories, as my preference is a short story with a plethora of details that really make it a good story. Again, thank you for helping me.

You're very welcome ^^
Don't worry about it, though. Every writer makes mistakes. Hell, I still make loads of errors xD
But that's what's so exciting about writing, I believe ^^ You can always learn something new!

You don't have to write longer stories. Some people are better at short ones =) And there are quite some who wrote really beautiful short stories.
I don't know where you want to go with your writing, but I always recommend one site:
LINK
It's the site of a published author who offers free workshops and How-Tos about writing. I have learned a lot there, so maybe you will too =)

[dapperblook]

Rolly-chan: You are absolutely correct. Add all of that to the fact that I cannot write more than a few pages without losing interest in a story and this would not have ended well anyway. I am going to take the first bit and elaborate, make it more detailed on why it was such a shock that they ended up together. Thank you for pointing out my errors. I am not the best at writing longer stories, as my preference is a short story with a plethora of details that really make it a good story. Again, thank you for helping me.

You're very welcome ^^
Don't worry about it, though. Every writer makes mistakes. Hell, I still make loads of errors xD
But that's what's so exciting about writing, I believe ^^ You can always learn something new!

You don't have to write longer stories. Some people are better at short ones =) And there are quite some who wrote really beautiful short stories.
I don't know where you want to go with your writing, but I always recommend one site:
LINK
It's the site of a published author who offers free workshops and How-Tos about writing. I have learned a lot there, so maybe you will too =)

Thank you so much, I'm sure that it will be a lot of help. Give me a couple days and the elaborated version will be up =)

[Rabbitheart]

It sounds pretty good so far. I would suggest adding a little more details to paint a more vivid picture of what's going on, but that might just be a personal preference of mine.

[dapperblook]

I fixed it and elaborated! Five comments before I add more, just like before!

[atumtay]

Wow! That was great! I honestly can't think of anything I would change, it's very nice . ^-^

[dapperblook]

There's one! I'm getting really excited with this story.

[Rolly-chan]

Wow! That's a vast improvement over the first piece! ^^ Especially your description! It ran much more smoothly and you could really relate to Annabelle this time =3
Keep up improving like that, and you'll be amazing in no time

[Asap1998]

Wow....it's great...keep writing:)

[dapperblook]

Thank you guys. Two more and I will post what I have again.