The Looking-glass Eyes (A Poem) Critiques Loved

[Iilyda]

Just a sampling poem by myself.

tнє ℓσσкιηg-gℓαѕѕ єуєѕ
My eyes are of glass
my flesh of decaying fibers.

My mouth gapes,
a haven for the water spiders.

My eyelids, half-sagged,
my tongue painted red.

Blue lips, blue veins
fingers paler than the dead.

Bruised knuckles and bruised cheeks.
You raise my limp hand to your wet face.

Brush my skin
thin as lace.

My spirit, it stares
with looking-glass eyes.

My corpse a vessel
borne up by your cries.

Not a breath ghosted.
Not a word uttered by tongue.

And yet I am trapped in body
hearing your keening song sung.

My spirit is watching you
with long-dead eyes.

But how are you to know
that I haven’t yet died?

[Evolution]

I am no poem expert. It is probably the worst piece of writing that I could write. But I do know that this is excellent! It is very detailed and the ryhymes fit into each other quite nicely. Very well done, Iilyda.

[Iilyda]

Thank you dearly. :3

[Iilyda]

{Small bump.}