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[~ moth ~]

mark, this seems helpful!

[minimire]

hey guys! so i finally have the urge to start writing fiction again after writing so many articles for class x.x

anyway I have a scene where a guy chases a girl and he starts singing to her to gain her attention. it has a few verses but what would be a good way to incorporate him singing the lyrics while describing what he's doing, what the girl is doing and what other people around them are doing? i hope this question makes sense? XD

[NopesaurusRexx]

hey guys! so i finally have the urge to start writing fiction again after writing so many articles for class x.x

anyway I have a scene where a guy chases a girl and he starts singing to her to gain her attention. it has a few verses but what would be a good way to incorporate him singing the lyrics while describing what he's doing, what the girl is doing and what other people around them are doing? i hope this question makes sense? XD

I've seen something like this done before (sadly, I cannot remember where or I would send you the info), but it kind of weaved the two together something like this:
(Don't mind this really bad example, just using words to make an image of it. If I wasn't at work I'd actually create a scene )

Description of the scene, guy running after girl. It just rained so the pavement is wet, smells dense from the heat of the sun that's now peaking though clouds. Her feet land in puddles splashing water up her legs. He begins to sing, hoping to use it as a distraction.

"Here insert some of singing
use the verse
make the block text
use just a few lines at a time"

Switch back to the girl as she hears the singing and how she reacts. Does she get scared or does it motivate her? How does he react?

"Insert more lines
from the song
in this kind of format
to break it away"

Add in people's reactions. This break lets us see the song as well as the images of the scene itself.

This formatting worked when I had seen it before. You can also use the regular format of dialogue but italicize the lyrics as he sings them. As long as we know that he is singing the lines, it should flow smoothly and let the reader understand what is going on.

[Pyjaks]

Any advice for getting back into writing after a long break? It used to be my absolute favorite hobby but for the past probably...five, six years I've written very sparingly, maybe 5-10k words per year at the absolute maximum. Lately I've been trying to reconnect with things that I know make me happy and while I'm enjoying getting back into it, I'm also feeling a little discouraged. This is gonna sound weird but I kinda feel awkward? Like an impostor, almost? Like, "why are you doing this you gave this up years ago you should leave this in the past". It doesn't help that 13/14 year old me was Soooo much better than I am now LOL (which, duh, skills degrade if you don't use them).

I dunno, that might make absolutely zero sense to anyone but myself but REGARDLESS any thoughts/advice is appreciated.

[.Cas.]

@Yenifer,

To your first question, I think it’s a great idea. I intended on posting a question about this as well, but I ultimately scrapped the story with this concept. It was only because the themes were being translated in an absolutely horrible way.

As long as you clarify the time/POV jumps, you should be ok here. Especially if you have alternate timelines.

[Pyjaks]

@Yenn-

Thank you this is really good advice and also super reassuring ;_; I think you're 100% right about not overwhelming myself and starting with oneshots/stuff like that, so I'm gonna do that! (ง'̀-'́)ง I did a challenge thread on here before and it was super fun, maybe I'll try that again.

Also I saw REMOVED MY B this tweet this morning and it feels like the universe was speaking directly to me so,, feelsgoodman

Edit: editing this to remove that tweet cause I didn't realize their was cursing forgive me y'all

[.Cas.]

I need some advice:

I have a class of kids (16-18) and I need to introduce them all. Most of them are supporting characters (cannon fotter, if you will) But I really strive to make each one truely rememberable.


Furthermore, if anyone here is a Daganronpa fan, I can use your help I’m another way. The book I’m writing is similar to Daganronpa in premise (without the the trials but with a whole different set of twist and turns). I’m looking for a way to incorporate elements similar to freetime events/the daily life to break up the game. Their captor is much different (and much more human) than someone like Monokuma

I also long to make that characters that dynamic. They don’t exactly have ultimates I can even start from.

I started this book before finding Daganronpa.

[Dizzy socks]

Would anyone be willing to read the first page of a short story I wrote a few days ago and give me some feedback please? I'd really appreciate it. Also happy to post it here if that's allowed.

[Aesome]

Would anyone be willing to read the first page of a short story I wrote a few days ago and give me some feedback please? I'd really appreciate it. Also happy to post it here if that's allowed.

If you are willing to post it on it's own thread, there's always that option.

I'd be up to read it. Can't say I'm a professional but I always find other people's writing interesting.


Edit: I was just looking through the forum and saw you posted. Was wondering if that was the one you wanted feedback on?

[Dizzy socks]

Would anyone be willing to read the first page of a short story I wrote a few days ago and give me some feedback please? I'd really appreciate it. Also happy to post it here if that's allowed.

If you are willing to post it on it's own thread, there's always that option.

I'd be up to read it. Can't say I'm a professional but I always find other people's writing interesting.


Edit: I was just looking through the forum and saw you posted. Was wondering if that was the one you wanted feedback on?

Thank you, I'd really appreciate that. It is the one I posted, yes.