misadventures & thoughts & events from el

[fruitvale]

where i mush together valued experiences and dumb misadventures alike for my own personal appeal. some for comedic effect and others more of a vent.

basically a diary to document my progress. it feels weird to put my experiences into english words, which dulls the whole memory into only a few words. like sifting through sand (good, inexplicable parts of that memory) to find seashells (the actual words i use).

*distorted harmonica noise*

[fruitvale]

mon, july 29th
4:12 am
housesitting

this morning at about 10 i woke up in my friend's bed, her cousin sleeping on a mattress on the floor and her passed out in the other bed in her "secret vsco girl room". prior to the sleepover i had brought over strong brew coffee, pumpkin pie spice, a frother from ikea and my dad's french press. her and i made coffee and struggled with the frother, giving up and leaving the double A battery beside it to try later. we grabbed two red mugs and i doctored up the coffee with some cinnamon, nutmeg, punpkin pie spice and vanilla. we sat and talked about something i can't really remember, i think about plans for this week or her recently closed musical or the books i gave her last night and painted foxes in at 5 am. my mom spammed me with weird bitmojis and i abruptly chugged the coffee, gathering my belongings and leaving the french press there.
i went home with my mom blasting some songs by the killers and quickly got MORE stuff to bring to housesit. we pumped my bike's tires and loaded it into the car (somehow), talking about the new season of stranger things and powdered donuts. we made it to the house, close to pretty much all of the main town, and in the vicinity of many different people i know. the husky and the little beagle mix immediately started cuddling all over me and my mom, and that's when she left. i got out karma- she's the little two-toed chameleon- and watched her clamber all over my hands and shirt.
i sent some amusing videos of the husky and karma to my close friends and talked to a good friend on discord for a while 'til i decided i wanted to ride my bike around town. i hadn't done it since 7th grade with my cousin, who i conveniently planned to hang out with soon anyways. while biking (i accidentally scraped the kickstand along a gas station parkinglot and nearly hit two of the biggest jerks in town [i really should have, they've done some pretty messed up stuff]) i stopped at the local dollar general, the cafe i'm well aquainted with (i babysit their kids and helped them with the interior building) and went back home, doing more art and making progress on a friend's kalon custom. karma tried climbing on the dollar general bag and lost grip and fell an inch off the box and i nearly cried from both laughter and worry. i caught up on camp camp and watched the first episode of that one show everyone on tumblr is freaking out about, good omens, and plan to watch the rest tomorrow night. unless i camp out on their roof. they don't have good connection up there.
besides that, i made ramen in a styrofoam bowl for dinner, my only proper meal of the day because i have no self control. i checked in on the room i'd be sleeping in, and honestly, i loved it. i've known the kid who lived there since she was announced and the first thing i see when i walk in there is a bnha poster. she has INCREDIBLY good drawings for a 9 year old girl, and good taste in fandoms lmao. and an overwhelming amount of undertale/fursona art. she left a few sticky notes warning me to not pull out a certain broke drawer or sit on the hanging hammock, and deliberately sat out all of her vinyl figures (??) to show off. my mom and brother stopped by after letting the dogs out again, and my brother pretty much met his soulmate after playing with the husky. they left me one (1) cup of coffee and a tupperware with spaghetti. my best friend stopped by and we played gta together for a while before she had to leave, and we struggled down the street in the middle of the night as she attempted to sit in the bike basket. it didn't work out and i ended up just biking to the only open store, a gas station managed by my best friend's mom. she gave me a sub and i was on my way, which was actually kind of scary after watching stranger things so much. but i got inside, took a shower, let the dogs out one more time and came into the room i was meant to be sleeping in 5 hours ago. instead, i read and thought, and decided to make this thread.
i couldnt stop thinking about banana muffins and the smell of rye bread so i think im gonna bake tomorrow too. i'm enjoying this little getaway. i'm gonna make crepes and bike to the arcade with a friend tomorrow, too, and catch up on missing work & learn some new dances for my summer camp tryout next year. well, technically i'm doing that all today. i've gotta be up in 3 and a half hours. i'll take a nap today too. go check on my grandpa and his project to finish our dream car, this incredible '69 corvette stingray. he promises to take me to prom in it, but i'm going with friends anyways. it's the thought that counts, being chauffeured by my (step) grandpa. he's incredible. i'll elaborate on my grandparents in some other story, which are equally hilarious and heartwarming the way they tell them. i'm wearing checkered clout goggles now. i need slep
goodnight

[fruitvale]

tuesday, july 30th
2:09 am
still housesitting

i woke up at 12 and missed tons of calls which sucked. rode my bike around, it was really uneventful. said hello to old friends and people my mom associates with. went to the local 'tastyfreeze' (thanks morgan, that's not the name lol), are icecream and yelled at my friends from across the street. held karma and panicked when i heard the backyard door open at midnight, got super paranoid. sat on the roof for a bit and watched more good omens with a cup of ramen. chose jibbetz for my crocs and now i'm sitting in the livingroom with a bag of takis. broke my kickstand gfdhggf. talked to my gf <3 didn't go to the arcade but did visit the library after five years lmao. only meals were ramen, ice cream, and a few takis oop
goodnight

[fruitvale]

sunday, august 4th
11:37 pm
livingroom floor

woke up early and got myself ready to go
xx↳ i actually woke up at like 11 but that's early for me in the summer lmao
xx↳ had a dream that i was heading off to france ?? i think, and couldn't ma
nage to get past airport security & the flight was delayed bc of weather & i
forgot to register my luggage & forgot a bunch of stuff at home & was late 2
my gate & once i was content on the plane i woke up lol
xx↳ ive been having a lot of days where like i'll think of something ( a word ,
a place, a person, a name, an event, etc) and it'll be a reoccurring thing for
the rest of the day. like i wont even talk ab it and other people will bring it
up and its super surreal.
xx↳ couldnt decide on what to wear (per usual, but not like some teenage g
irl in a movie, more of like. i couldnt find anything i wanted and when i did
it wouldn't match lol.) so i just chose this pale red colored tee and some da
rk gray sweatpants lmao.
xx↳ my grandma stopped by and started talking ab my brother's band camp
(i'm not into it anymore oops) and suddenly her n my mom are arguing ab fr
ee healthcare and debt and student loans. they're both losing it fdsngkdffd
went to an outlet mall for back to school shopping
xx↳ i HATE talkin ab school in general bc like. this year is gonna be,,, vv fun
xx↳ on our way we dropped off my brother at his gfs house ! her uncle (who
she lives with) is a teacher n the robotics coach. he's hella cool.
xx↳ my mom + i jammed out to some of her favorites, she didn't appreciate it
when i turned off her nkotb to play queen tho hAH
xx↳ went to h&m first- got two floral sweatshirts, one that says rome n the o
ther lyon and a pair of mom jeans kfgflhgfhn
xx↳ forever 21 next- got a red flannel skirt (i'm being heather chandler for ha
lloween w two of my friends !!!!!); a long checkered tshirt; a black turtleneck
sweater-dress; some cute belts; a yellow and white 'frat boy' collared shirt (cr
edit to my mom for the name lol, she said i looked like i was named lacrosse);
n finally a warm-colored rainbow sweater tshirt !
xx↳ i cant remember the name of the next store bu
t i got three champion sports bras and a sweatshirt yeehaw
xx↳ we plan to go to the mall closer to us and buy some stuff from the zumiez
there, jus like.. long sleeves and maybe some sweatshirts
or sweatpants ? also a cheap pair of white fila shoes !
xx↳ i wanna go to salvation army again since its been a hot sec, the people i
kno that shop there haven't gone in a bit either so i c
an get all the goodies :imp:
xx↳ unrelated but i Love My Crocs and there's this one jibbet that says "BROWN"
but. it's red. its so FUNNY I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY
went to aldi, played minecraft, watched a movie
xx↳ so at aldi we uhhh. we kinda went crazy w the stuff we bought and? i have
no regrets
xx↳ also sort of unrelated but im revamping my room !!!! theres uhh this big ol'
great wave tapestry on the inner wall ! i may go more int
o depth someday ? but here's a semi-accurate map !


xx↳ i was gettin used 2 pc mc when my mom called me to watch a movie. it was
"every day" and i LOVE the book tbh, the movie let me down : / it was good in
some ways but like.. butchered it into a romcom that wasn't even enjoyable aft
er reading the book ?? honestly gFDHGFH
xx↳ i struggled w resource packs n am STILL struggling with shaders but ! i gotta
sleep soon, i'm going camping this week n going to an amusement park, gotta uh
rest up :sunglasses:

goodnight

[fruitvale]

friday, august 16th
11:25 pm
my bed

eating nachos, strawberries n taffy & that's been my only meal all day
feels and tastes like a weird combo but idrc lmao
been listening to some mac demarco? after my lovely gf recommended it, and thats ab all ive been playin for as long as ive been home, delved into some songs relative to his
went out to eat w my parents and stopped at my favorite cafe, saw the graphic design building i may intern at!
best friend wont reply n hasnt replied to anyone for a bit and im kinda scared, she never gets grounded at her dad's so im sure she just broke it or lost it or something
storming right now, i can see the reflection of my neighbor's garage lights on the road so i think its a bit flooded, and i opened my window a tad bit
hung out with some old friends for the past 4 days after camping and going to this neat amusement park, we made a fort in my basement & watched beetlejuice & painted (i did my first portrait ever of this model girl who goes to my school, we played minecraft together once and griefed my cousin's farm so i told her id paint her despite having never done it before lol)
wanna stop at the poke bowl place opening up a few towns over soon, i think they have good boba tea
gonna rollerskate with some friends on the weekend and hopefully eat a decend meal
goodnight

[fruitvale]

saturday, august 17th
12:12 pm
my bed, still

context on random things in my room

there's this hole in my ceiling, maybe the size of a nickel, on the side closest to my brother's and to the right if you were facing the inner wall. i used to think it was a bug when i was little and asked my mom what it was. it's apparently for a wire for the office she used to use when i wasn't born, and they changed it into a baby's room after i was.

the clock on the opposite wall to the hole was bought at the "at home" store, a neat little thing with pearlescent white trim and fancy numbers. its hands are permanently stuck at 7:48:29 and im too short lazy to take it down.

the quilt im sitting on now was handmade by my great grandma who's somehow still kickin' it down in tennessee. on one side, there's a cute warm-colored hedgehog pattern, and on the other, there's a mix of crimson, orange, yellow, green, navy and some birds & leaves. she called me a few years ago, maybe when i was 11, and asked me for my favorite colors. after answering, she muttered a bit and hung up. less than two weeks later, a box was mailed to my house, containing the quilt. my best friend loves it so much that she uses it each time she comes over.

[fruitvale]

im poting this realy late its been up for a while i dont eant to time it out and lose these

minecraft pets

cats
aleksy- gray
bc i thought it sounded cool and like.. stone-y, like gray
berlioz- white w/ heterochromia
i knew a white cat named berlioz! it sounds strange and artistic
rowan- ginger tabby
bc of warriors aljfahflajjf
stauber- white and gray tabby
name of a friend's old cat
elowen- brown tabby
the combo of the cats warm colored fur and soft yellow eyes made me think of like,, fairy names n elowen was the name of an OLD fairy character of mine!
fable- tuxedo
name of a black-and-white cat at the shelter i volunteer at, hes a sleepy boy gksjkfjs
monroe- black
sounded elegant, idk, sable was my second choice but sable and fable dont mix well
tiramisu- tan
jus bc it sounds nice and i had good tiramisu cake at a bookshop while traveling
friday- calico
reminded me of like.. flamboyant colors and splatters of paint
kirby- siamese
kirby sounds cute and idk. i jus like it tons
jericho - snowshoe
it was Fitting

birds
ezra- red parrot
e- names have red vibes to em hAh
gil- teal macaw
a cheesy, cute n short name for a cheesy colored baby!!!
bailey- cockatiel
soft names for soft birds,,
prince- blue macaw
the blue was kinda royal-ish so naturally.. prince
takunda "tk"- parakeet (after a friend!)
tk has two birds irl, kiwi and mango! while in his server i made fun of how many solely green birds he had so this is for u tAkUnDa. i beat him in kings court and he cant talk smack ab me anymore LMAO

dogs
rosco "ross"- red collar
rosco was cute for like a leader type? idk??
gwendolin "gwen"- yellow collar
a neat n unique name for a soft girlie!
oleander "andy"- light blue collar
quirky but simple and the name andy reminds me of my brothers old friend whos room was. All Blue.
caprico "cap"- lime green collar
capri suns, summery green energy 😎

horses
starbucks- baby "mocha" bay
coffe colored & horse pun intended! ("bucks" "buck")
nutmeg- chestnut mamma
nutmeg has always been a name ive wanted 2 use n her colors r very warm!
ristretto- black and white pinto
it. sounded rad HAH, also cafe family
kitty- white
bc i couldnt kill the horse i accidentally spawned in their barn so i put her in the extra stall and named her kitty after a friend's cow!

bunnies
lyon- tan
uhhhh i got a shirt tht said it and thought it was nice
elmer- cream
e- names are just really good.....
agnes- albino
agnes, albino, ya dig
rome- brown
rome has like a cool feel to it?? and i thought it was suiting to this little guy!
cecil- black
read below rome's!
bernice- spotted
name of my gma's old black and white rat!

llamas
winifred- brown & cream
old timey name for a soft lookin gal
billie- white
old timey name for a funky lookin gal
frankie- cream
old timey name for a sweet lookin gal

sheep
salvadore- red
spells red in the name! no i just thought it was cool hslfjajf
citrus- orange
c,, citrus
marigold- yellow
the flower!
nascar- lime green
idk my brother has this old toy car he wrote "nascar" on with a sharpie n its obnoxiouslt green ahha
tom- green
classic name fitting to a classic color
sophia- light blue
girl i knew in the 2nd grade named sopia who Loved the color n always had blue school supplies lol, also golden girls opportunity
yale- teal
idk
dorothy- blue
golden girls 2
veronica- purple
was gonna write "vine" but.. veronica sawyer yflwjfkwjjf
mags- magenta
just,, shorter version!
rose- pink
rosy pink, also golden girls
blanche- white
blanche, white, golden girls yea my imagination is dwindling
ford- brown
got nostalgic for cars
khan- light gray
idk khan academy notification popped up lmao
bentley- gray
also car name
monet- black
yknow. clod money, my favorite impersonist artist

cows
bessie
betty
alice
beatrice
edith
harriet
all classy names!

pigs
eleanor
grace
alvin
benjamin
joseph
cute lil names...

chickens
josephine
hazel
heather
eden
raymond
margarette
samson
same for the last 2 hah

misc.
orchid- fox
lotus- fox
twins,,,,,,,
blair- bat
blair witch project, bat, spooky... yea
earnest- mule
melanie- donkey
names of some nice store owners i met heheh
ste Ave- all of my fish glsjfhskg
inside joKE OOPS

[fruitvale]

tuesday, august 27th
10:27 pm
my basement couch

(britney chomps, she turns off her phone and wraps the open end to her hot cheeto bag we got from walmart earlier. my dad just got home, drunk and loud with my brother upstairs while they play guitar and make fun of movie theater workers(?). i curl up in my great grandma's blanket. i miss her. she passed two weeks ago and my parents didn't even tell me. she was the only good one out of everyone down there.)
me: are we gonna paint yet?
(she lifts a finger mid-chew.)
me: i dont think i wanna hear (i make exaggerated chomping noises) for 10 more minutes.
b: one second, i need something to drink.
me: theres a can in the blanket
b: what????? (she searches frantically, obviously confused.)
me: in the blanket, dummy, its with my computer and the lamp. it's vanilla pepsi. (i point to the quilt.)
b: oh, okay. (and she continues to chew. i dont know why but i HATE the sound of peoples mouths. it drives me insane and makes me wanna scream and cry and punch something. food asmr makes me cry.)
b: idk i just felt really.. homesick?
me: so do u wanna go home?
b: no ive been home for like 6 days, surprising right?
me: surprised you havent snuck out yet haha
b: no i wouldnt do that
me: dont u run off with ur friends in town?
b: no! i dont do that ive done it before but not recently
me: didnt u and modert sneak out in july for like a week?
b: no i stayed back and uhhh slept (she burps and throws me a timberland shoe box.) you get the one with the spider in it. braelyn deserves better haha
(time passes. we still sit on opposing couches. a video on her phone mentions a retainer.)
b: i might be getting a retainer.
me: ohhhh, good luck not throwing it away. like at lunch, u know.
b: nah probably braces.
me: well, u can pull them off. tori pulled them off, im sure you'll be fine.
b: what??????
me: u know, uh, pull them off. like, i can pull off this shirt. make it look good.
b: (she hesitates. turns off her phone so the bass-boosted tiktok music stops. she reels her head back and grins.) oh!!! yeah!!!
me: my god, your vocabulary needs to expand!!
(she dances in the reflection of a bottle my dad use to use to make beer, i think. branded by some company downtown with a tribal sun, some bulldog and an old english font. my basement smells a bit like acrylic paint and cotton if cotton had a scent. there's a big, boxy tv in the corner. i remember watching beastie boy music videos with my dad + brother when we were young on it. in the other room lies a busted up pool table and my dad's drum set. there's a freezer with expired milk cartons sitting at the bottom. britney does a tiktok for braelyn & trips on a blanket. the workout room is beside the pool room, ancient fairy lights dazzling through the doorframe. we keep our christmas and halloween decorations in there. i faintly remember doing dollar store crafts with my grandma a long time ago, the last time she visited. the bathroom that hasn't worked since 17 years ago when my parents got the house. almost 18! then theres the laundry room ig. its hella gross down here. the walls are mainly green brick and false wood paneling. my brother and i caught two snakes in the windowframe im sitting under a couple weeks back. my dad hung a airforce tapestry beside it and i taped a bob ross poster beneath it. on the counter, a fan stands daring to topple over but i know it won't. the clock on the oven is far beyond broken. there's an accumulation of comforters and pillows on the far side of the room, kiddycorner to the tv. our painting supplies are over there. theres yarn and my moms photography equipment. i wish she were more successful with that hobby. my polaroid compilation is nothing compared to it.
britney's sitting on my brother's childhood blanket, a quilt with road signs plastered to a blue base. i'm on my childhood blanket, a pink, green n red strawberry quilt, cuddled up to my other one sent up by nanny west. i miss her.
i snap back to reality and britney is laughing obnoxiously over an instagram post. i laugh along mainly bc i dont understand and she's wheezing at this point. i'm glad to have her.)

[fruitvale]

thursday 6:37 august 29th rival team bleachers
wearing pink floral checkered vans, ripped mom jeans, a longsleeved team shirt & a flower lei (for the hawaiian theme)
first game of the season, 50 minutes away in another poor little farm town
much like mine but they actually have a sewage system
there's a line of fir trees maybe 40 yards away from me protectung a neighboring basketball court + small suburbs
their elementary school building is smaller than the football field, it seems
i'm behind their tiny bleachers for visiting teams in the shade w/ a couple friends, sipping flat coca cola from cheap plastic coconut cups
a tiny moth lands on a blade of grass a few feet away
i fiddle with a clover for a second, taking that time to aprpeciate my nails growth after getting over the habit of biting them so much
a dollar general bag is beside me with snacks n supplies, like a few strawberry mentos
my brother sits above me with his track friends; he's in direct sunlight for some reason
the spectator bus all 60 of us took parks beyond the fences; i can hear the middle school team in the stands talking about the senior quarterback, who broke his leg during the first scrimmage
cheerleaders line up and practice
i run my index finger along a scratch on my foot i got while in the woods during a bonfire, scrambling away from their neighbors in the middle of the night
i'll get up and go find my other friends & fetch my money, probably eat more strawberry mentos
summer ends next monday

[fruitvale]

the second night i had been down in florida, my parents took me down to the shoreline for a walk.

it was about midnight and a storm was coming over the atlantic, just barely upon us. i was wearing a lifeguard sweatshirt and some bathing suit bottoms. no shoes because it was just some sand & sawgrass.

my parents wandered off to talk to fishermen that had found a ghost crab. while they questioned them about prices, i watched the shore. waves came up and enveloped my toes with murky water. it was far too dark to look for shells like i had done earlier in the day, so instead i popped in an earbud and listened to some billie eilish.

it was the most calming moment of that vacation. nevermind the stress of finding places to eat, golfing in direct sunlight for six hours straight, or crying over being locked out in the middle of a storm. just the sound of distant thunder, ocean ambience & lovely blasting from my overpriced headphones i got at an airport in detroit. i couldn't hear the discussion going on a couple yards away; i didn't want to.

a few days ago, i walked my friend samantha home. my bike was being guided by lazy hands. her and i watched cornfields sway as trucks passed by & i helped her with her relationship problems. when she was let off and i finally waved goodbye, i hopped on my bike, fixing the box tied to the back.

not only was i glad for that chance alone, i cherished it. i weaved between the lanes and avoided cars by taking a trail to the sandpit. when i got home, things pretty much exploded. it was terrible. a lot of yelling.

the calm before the storm, ig.