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[yves]

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RHI’S
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[yves]

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FOREWORD:

hello all -- welcome to my writing thread!! this is just a place to store
ideas and prose (drabbles, one-shots etc), and all i ask from you is to not
comment! by all means pm me if you have any feedback or just want to
talk... that is and always will be appreciated <3 this will mainly consist of
drabbles for my OCs; some of it might not make sense out of context, so
i’ll link their google docs as well -- although some are unfinished because
i’m kinda lazy lmao.

all the drabbles posted here are in chronological order (to the time they
were written) and any other oc mentioned belongs to my girlfriend. you can
find their writing storage here -- check her out, she's very very talented!!



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[yves]

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CONTENTS:

001 x OUTED ............................ 16/04/2019
002 x SHE’S SO GONE .................. 20/04/2019
003 x THE WISH'......................... 02/04/2020
004 x WHO KNEW'....................... 06/06/2020
005 x GIRL’S TALK ...................... 08/06/2020
006 x FIRST KISS ........................ 09/06/2020
007 x CEMETERY CONVERSATIONS'.... 11/06/2020
008 x WOUNDS .......................... 29/06/2020
009 x VALENTINE’S DAY ................ 18/07/2020
010 x ROSE & CROWN .................. 22/07/2020
011 x PATROL ............................ 30/07/2020
012 x FIRST IMPRESSIONS .............. 06/11/2020
013 x THINK OF CHRISTMAS ........... 06/12/2020
014 x ISOLATED .......................... 09/01/2021
015 x DETERMINATION .................. 17/01/2021
016 x ACCEPTING' ....................... 18/01/2021
017 x LOATHING ......................... 02/05/2021
018 x VIGIL ............................... 14/06/2021



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[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ OUTED
au, derry girls (2018—present) ━━ character, shannon maccarthy
word count, 809 ━━ date written, 16/04/2019 ━━ content warnings, homophobia and outing

The previous night all seemed to happen unnaturally fast. Shannon was lying on the sofa in the living room, staring mindlessly up at the ceiling as she recollected the events of last night. At that moment, the thought of sitting cross-legged on her bed and giggling away with Maddie, her best friend from school, seemed like a million miles away.

Well, Maddie was a lot more than that. Deep down, Shannon genuinely cared for her; she loved her, even. It seemed as though the feelings were mutual, as well — because why else would Maddie have made the move to attempt to kiss her otherwise? Yet the girls were disrupted by Shannon’s mother, whose sole presence instinctively pulled the girls apart from one another.

Maddie’s beautiful features, freckled face and natural ginger hair remained in Shannon’s vision, until the girl pulled away in the memory as she had done the previous evening. Hastily apologising to Shannon and her mum, saying how she shouldn’t have come over, before she grabbed her belongings and made herself scarce. She was only trying to make the situation less complicated, Shannon supposed but she still wished she had stayed, so she could have someone with her while she had to endure her mother’s distraught yells of disbelief and, frankly, humiliation.

It rendered Shannon speechless; she was way too overcome by what her mother was screaming to merely utter a word. To think that Shannon wanted to come out soon was the most heartbreaking, because she just witnessed what her own mother thinks of who she truly is.

A bird’s caw in the distance was what brought Shannon’s attention to her mother in the kitchen in the other room, who she hadn’t been able to speak to since the affair last night, especially not after the yells from both her mum and dad, heard all the way from upstairs as Shannon laid in her bed at night. It wasn’t like she managed to sleep a week, anyway.

“Ma, please,” Shannon pleaded as she paced through to the kitchen, right the way over to where her mother was washing the dishes by the sink. “Please. I’m so sorry, I didn’t —” she felt her voice cracking, “— I didn’t mean to hurt you. I promise. I wouldn’t hurt you intentionally… I’m sorry.”

Ashleigh continued to scrub at a particular plate, yet her gaze unwavered and almost refused to even take so much as a glimpse upwards.

“I know — I know — I can be a bad person and I can lie —” Shannon persevered. It was true, too; when Ashleigh asked if she was seeing anyone, Shannon simply said no without hesitation. Although they weren’t officially going out, her and Maddie had gotten undeniably closer and she started feeling a little thing for her; her absolutely beautiful best friend that she just longed for a few more seconds with.

No reply.

“I appreciate everything you have done for me — I’m so sorry for being ungrateful,” came Shannon’s voice once more. She refused to give up, even if the recollection of her own ma calling her an “ungrateful cow” after raising her and putting a roof over her head, only to (in Ashleigh’s words) have it thrown back into her face like this.

Silence again, apart from the sloshing of water against the washing-up bowl. Then a brief pause ensued, with Shannon shakily drawing a breath as she felt tears beginning to well up in her eyes. Could all of this be falling on deaf ears? Was Ashleigh really that ashamed and humiliated not to even talk to her own daughter again, let alone look at her?

“Please, Ma, at least just talk to me — please.” Desperation in Shannon’s voice appeared all the more evident. “But you need to realise that this is me and I’m not going to change! I don’t want to change and I can’t… Ma, please talk to me!”

Ashleigh abruptly glanced up, holding a stern gaze with her daughter, whose eyes had a slight glimmer of hope when she was finally acknowledged after endless pleas, for a good few moments. Briskly looking away again is what yanked any remaining hope from Shannon.

“Please just leave, I cannot even bear to look at you right now,” Ashleigh said nonchalantly, piercing the short silence and subsequently Shannon's final hopes. She didn’t utter another word, and instead Shannon made for the front door; she just wanted fresh air and space — and lots of it. The subconscious lump in her throat was almost choking her no matter how hard she swallowed. Tears cascaded down Shannon's face one by one as she lost all control in holding them back. A deep breath, and Shannon had disappeared out the front door in an instant.

Despite her mother’s staggering prejudice, she was still her mum. And Shannon had lost her.

xxxx━━━

author’s note, lmao so this is... old. and it needs updating a ton because how shannon’s mum found out about her daughter’s sexuality has massively changed since this was written -- though i believe it’s in more detail on her google doc!! this is also inspired by a scene in lady bird, and i specifically used it to help me with the dialogue!

[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ SHE’S SO GONE
au, derry girls (2018—present) ━━ character, shannon maccarthy
word count, 1,078 ━━ date written, 20/04/2019 ━━ content warnings, none

Friday, 23rd August 1996. The date of the post-results day house party hosted by Charlene Kavanagh, in the humid heat of the midsummer evening.

With the last of the sun’s rays for that day, a canvas of oranges, yellows and pinks painted the sky like watercolours. From the outside of Charlene’s grand family home, muffled sounds of music can be heard. Its large garden with a long stretch of grass came a long way in, several metres away from the winding country road at the front, with rose bushes lining the front iron gates. Being one of the most popular girls at Our Lady Immaculate, Charlene had that stereotypically huge house and a rich upbringing. On the bright side, it was the perfect location for a party on the night that the Year 13 and 14 girls received their A level results.

“Where the hell do you think you two are off to?” came Michelle’s loud and boisterous voice, abruptly, calling after Shannon, who grabbed Erin’s hand and was making her way out the front room into the corridor. Almost deafening music blasted into Shannon’s ears and, if it wasn’t for Michelle’s naturally forceful voice, the redhead probably still would have continued with her girlfriend down to the back room.

“Somewhere quiet,” replied Erin, as Michelle caught up with them, “so we can actually hear ourselves think without yelling over one another. Y’know?”

“Just to talk,” added Shannon hastily.

“Aye, I know, I know! Go on then, ya wee lovebirds,” Michelle said with a chuckle, although she received a mildly wary glare from Erin. Even after almost two years of their relationship being public, she still wasn’t overly confident; in fact, she was more worrisome in case they were judged, or that the incident at Derry Pride repeated itself.

With that, Shannon and Erin continued through to the room at the very back of Charlene’s house, barging through the girls and their boyfriends chattering over the head-splitting music blasting from the front room. Down the corridor, there was a weird amalgamation of perfume, aftershave and B.O, which frankly reeked when all mixed as one, as well as the very strong smell of beer and other alcoholic beverages.

Once the couple stepped through the open doors onto the back porch, the fresh night time breeze instantly hit Shannon’s face, along with the unfortunate stench of cigarette smoke. That was the one disadvantage of retreating to the outdoors: all the smokers, since Charlene and her friends tried their best to usher them all out her house, were heavily insisted on smoking outside only. Yet Erin managed to locate an empty spot by the corner of the railings of the porch, where the two managed to slot themselves in.

As they broke into conversation, Shannon couldn’t help but overlook the extravagant garden with a maze of lush green bushes—at least, it appeared like a maze from the distance they stood at. Lamps scattered around the green, dimly lit up area in the steadily growing darkness, with the stars twinkling in the night sky Some couples, or even some individuals as well, simply took brief refuge outside before returning to the noisy recklessness that was the party, or perhaps to relieve some of the sweat from the boiling temperature due to the build-up of people inside.

“Shannon?” echoed Erin, though the redhead didn’t respond at first, appearing frankly absent-minded if anything. “Shannon…?!” That time, the blonde violently shook her girlfriend’s shoulders, snapping Shannon out of her reverie at an instant. “I said, ‘we’ll still be able to stay in close contact whilst at uni, right?’”

“Of course we will! We’re still at the same campus, right? And we’re still living in Derry, silly,” Shannon responded, though she still appeared a little out of it. A pause. The music from the house could be heard, albeit muffled, as well as chatting, yelling and laughing surrounding them. Could now be the time? It was better late than never at all. Shannon inhaled sharply, “Hey, Erin,” her arms dropped to her sides and gently grasped Erin’s hands, giving them a slight squeeze. “T—there’s something I need to do quickly… Someone I need to talk to. I won’t be long at all, I promise. I just need to get this off my chest.” Erin’s features turned to perplexity, though she feebly nodded and Shannon released her soft grip on her hands. “Fifteen minutes. If that.” Exhaling heavily, Shannon turned briskly and made her way down the porch and located an isolated spot in the garden.

She came to a standstill by a flowerbed of pink, red and white roses as she retrieved a small mobile device from the pocket of her jeans (even if it was a couple of years old and miraculously affordable, it still did the job). A crumpled piece of paper came out with it, with a number scribbled hurriedly across it, which Shannon luckily managed to get from her sister. Taking a deep breath, she dials the number as it’s written and it rings. And rings. Just as she had expected. It rang one last time before she left a message:

“Hi, Ma. It’s me, Shannon. You may be wondering how I got your number but... Evie gave it to me. I know it’s been awhile since we last spoke, or since we were on good terms, even. I don’t know if you’re listening right now, but I wanted to say one last thing before I leave for university. That’s right, Ma, I’m going to university.

“It’s been over two years, which is somewhat shocking, I guess? It feels like it’s gone fast, but at other times, it doesn’t at all. I am sorry, though; sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner. And sorry that you had to find out the way you did. But I’m really not going to apologise for who I am. Because I feel great, y’know? I’m not pretending to be someone I’m not and, guess what, I even have a girlfriend. That’s right. But either way, the old Shannon, the one that you knew… she’s long gone. No matter how much you want her back.

“But you’re still my ma, no matter how many arguments and stress I may have caused. You just have to let me be myself and accept that.” The recorded message forcibly ended, though Shannon’s voice managed to crack out a shaky, “I love you.” Her mother just didn’t hear that part.

xxxx━━━

author’s note, DON’T LOOK IF YOU HATE CANON X OC OMG. i never understood why people Hate™ canon x oc so this is what my girlfriend and i did. 😁👍 anyways, i wrote two shannon drabbles last year and dipped lmao... then my writing renaissance was born last week.

[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ THE WISH
au, buffy the vampire slayer (1997—2003) ━━ character, lauren gardner
word count, 402 ━━ date written, 02/04/2020 ━━ content warnings, none

Breathe. That’s what she kept telling herself. Keep it together, stay calm. Lauren’s mind raced as she veered sharply into the girls’ bathroom. Emotions shrouded her, cutting off any rational thought that came into her head.

Another deep breath, and Lauren gripped the edge of the counter with sweaty palms at the first available basin that came into view. Thankfully — after storming in from the bustling corridor — the bathroom appeared to be deserted. Glancing up at her reflection in the mirror, with the growing tightness of her chest, she swallowed a gasp of air. Lauren wasn’t even sure what she was feeling; it was some mixture of distraught and anger.

Lauren could feel her heart pounding rapidly in her chest, and she impulsively let out a kick at the cupboard doors below the sinks. In doing so, a tiny chain-like thing fell to the solid floor. The rattling noise seemed to catch Lauren’s attention immediately; she curiously crouched down to pick it up, and a perplexed expression adorned her evidently stressed features.

A navy-blue gemstone in the centre of a silver pendant glistened in the bright light over Lauren’s head, which heeded notice of an ancient inscription on the back of the necklace. Perhaps it was worth mentioning it to her Watcher to further investigate what the artifact was, so Lauren kept a tight hold of the pedant.

Yet Lauren snapped back to reality, returning to a stand so she was staring straight back at her reflection in the smeared, slightly scratched mirror again. The anger was at herself, Lauren came to realise. She had one chance to mend her friendship with Emmie, and Lauren had to blow it. She screwed up for a second time, and this time it was beyond repair. But she couldn’t help herself. Julia made her feel exceedingly angry, for whatever reason that was unknown to Lauren. If it wasn’t for Julia, Lauren couldn’t help but imagine life without her. No rivalry; no receiving backhanded compliments when it came to how Lauren was slaying; no feeling of being second-best; and certainly no argument with Emmie.

If it wasn’t for Julia, she and Emmie would still be best friends.

Lauren’s grasp on the unidentified artifact tightened as she held it close to the sink. With an unwavering gaze at her reflection, Lauren uttered, her voice hoarse through her anxiety, “I wish Julia never came to Alexandria.”

xxxx━━━

author’s note, this isn’t my writing renaissance just yet... just a little drabble i wrote after i took a slight nervous breakdown so!!! isn’t that just great!!! anyway, this is for a pretty hefty btvs au my girlfriend and i developed -- there’s more info here if you’re curious! really, it’s just a big old canon divergent au where we collectively decided to ignore the comics.

[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ WHO KNEW
au, orange is the new black (2013—2019) ━━ character, winnie cartwright
word count, 1,041 ━━ date written, 06/06/2020 ━━ content warnings, death

The visitation hall was oddly quiet for a Sunday afternoon; Winnie could only count six occupied tables as she followed the line of other inmates into the room — which made sense, considering there were only six inmates including her. It wasn’t uncommon for visitation to be this quiet. It often fluctuated in how busy it is, which made sense; inmates aren’t always going to have visitors.

It just made the room that Sunday a lot quieter, Winnie supposed, as she pulled up a chair in front of a slender woman with dark hair and intensely green eyes, who acknowledged Winnie’s arrival. Andrea Campbell, an ex-colleague from the money laundering ring Winnie was involved with, whom she reluctantly agreed to meet. They weren’t especially close, and aside from Amelia, she was one of the only members of the gang Winnie actively communicated with. Still, Campbell wasn’t the person to call up for a visit out of the blue — something significant was bound to have happened, but that was all Winnie knew.

“So, how’s this place treating you, Cartwright?” remarked Campbell, although it seemed more like a pitiful attempt to start a conversation more than anything.

“Come off it, Campbell. You and I both know we were never the ones for friendly smalltalk,” said Winnie curtly. It was true: the two colleagues involved in the same gang were reasonably close, but it stopped at merely tolerating one another and occasionally working side-by-side. It meant the two women were still on a surname-only basis. “So, what do you want? What’s so important?”

A pause. With a deep breath, Campbell finally spoke, “I came into some information recently. It’s probably — you definitely won’t like this but —” In some attempt to provide solace, Campbell placed a slender, pale hand upon Winnie’s — although the brunette instantly and sharply withdrew. Whatever that was, it wasn’t going to work, and it was definitely out of character. Campbell was trying to say something but, for whatever reason, she couldn’t stop beating around the bush, and instead tried to comfort Winnie, which only caused more overthinking. Then she abruptly spoke up again, “It’s about Amelia —”

“Just cut to the ch—” Winnie muttered, eyes narrowed, but she instantly stopped mid-sentence as the last line registered. Amelia. What about her girlfriend? What had happened to her? “What about her?” Winnie replied, with an unwavering stare towards Campbell, heartbeat rapidly increasing.

Another deep breath. “Amelia is dead, Cartwright,” Campbell said shortly.

“What do you mean she’s dead?!” came Winnie’s slightly raised voice in bemusement. She couldn’t be — not Amelia. Winnie was going to get out of this shithole after her sentence, she was going to find Amelia, and they’d distance themselves from that gang for good. How did this happen? But she steadied, and her mind started to rationalise itself after hearing such news. “Why should I even believe you? What proof do you even have?”

“Why would I even lie? Think about it,” replied Campbell. Winnie wondered why she’d even ask such a thing — when did a gang member not lie, when could a gang member ever be trusted? “She visited you about two weeks ago, did she not?”

It clicked into place. Vivid flashbacks popped up in Winnie’s mind from two weeks ago, Amelia saw her in visitation. She had implied her intention of skipping down immediately, after she unassociated herself with the gang. No gang would risk the opportunity to let a former member roam free and, even though Amelia was the leader’s niece, gangs are ruthless. They definitely would not have turned down the idea of murdering their own blood, especially if it was to keep their dirty little secrets of crimes safe.

Amelia wasn’t Winnie’s next of kin, so the prison wouldn’t have been notified, nor would they have been under obligation to tell her. It was mere hearsay from Campbell, but it was believable. Shoot, how was she so stupid not to realise what her own girlfriend was trying to tell her?

As everything fell into place, the realisation hit Winnie like a ton of bricks. Like gravity forced her back down to reality again. Everything felt heavy; heart racing, stomach churning; it was nauseating. Hearing her girlfriend had allegedly been murdered by her own flesh and blood was not the information Winnie expected to hear on a Sunday, no matter how unexpected Campbell’s visitation order was.

“Cartwright —”

Winnie glanced up at the sound of her name, with an evidently vulnerable look in her eyes. Of course she looked vulnerable, she had just found out her girlfriend was more or less dead. She was gone. But Winnie also needed to get herself together, and she physically couldn’t if she stayed here for one second longer. “I don’t wanna hear it,” she uttered, coming to a stand almost instantly. Despite Campbell’s pleas to call her back to “talk it out”, which also attracted the guards’ attention in the process, Winnie made a beeline for the entrance back to the prison. It was back into the literal shithole, but Winnie desperately wanted to be anywhere but the visitation hall.

Except when she was let back through to the prison block, following judgemental glares from the commanding officers, Winnie wasn’t quite sure where she was going to go. She wanted to get out of the visitation hall as soon as possible, but didn’t think it through that literally nowhere in prison is private. She didn’t even want to go to Red at this point in time; she just wanted to be alone. Winnie urgently needed to set her mind at ease. Except that’s difficult when it’s racing at a hundred miles per hour, and her heart was relentlessly pounding and unwilling to give up. Cursing aloud and receiving yet another disapproving stare from a guard, Winnie resisted the urge to impulsively kick a wall.

Who knew? Who knew it would end like this? Winnie and Amelia had been apart for several months already, but now they felt even more distant than ever. The one person that kept Winnie grounded; the one person Winnie truly cared about, and the one person who could understand Winnie more than anyone — she was gone.

xxxx━━━

author’s note, i wrote this last saturday WHOOOOOO. “writing renaissance” LET’S GOOOO. winnie is the oc that got me back into oc making and... it took me 500+ days to write something on her. icb.

[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ GIRL’S TALK
au, stranger things (2016—present) ━━ character, sydney trachtenberg
word count, 1,394 ━━ date written, 08/06/2020 ━━ content warnings, none

“Hey, Syd,” Jess’ voice rang through the abandoned junkyard as she announced her arrival back from the convenience store. Such noise instantly attracted Sydney’s attention, who hastily spun her head around to locate Jess at the far side of the junkyard. Sydney watched as Jess skillfully scaled the fence before leaping down from the top, carefully landing atop an old car within the yard.

“Do you have to make such a dramatic entrance every time?” Sydney called, but a slight smirk played on her features nonetheless. Dare she admit it, she was a little impressed at her friend’s reckless and adventurous behaviour.

“Where’s the frickin’ fun otherwise?” remarked Jess, returning the smirk. She appeared almost cocky as she hopped between cars via the rooftops, which was typical and very on-brand for Jess. The large area the two girls were in was Jess’ secret safe space for years was littered with fly-tipped couches, wrecked cars and even rejected school buses. Windows were shattered from when Jess would often — as she explained to Sydney — “take my anger out on something other than myself or my family”.

“Y’know, you’re so stupid,” Sydney teased, as Jess continued to effortlessly step across to where Sydney was perched on a car’s hood, She slid down the windscreen to come to a standstill beside the the other blonde.

Jess feigned hurt at Sydney’s joke, but proceeded to retrieve two cans from a plastic bag. “Oi — shut up and drink,” she said, handing one of the cans to Sydney. After a brief pause where Sydney appeared mildly puzzled, she finally accepted the can of beer from Jess’ hand. “What is it, priss? Have you never had beer before?” Jess commented, cracking open her own beer and taking a brisk swig.

“O—Of course I have!” Sydney responded defensively. It was a lie; she could already feel Jess’ sceptical glare as she uttered the words. Truthfully, Sydney hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol in her life, unless you included one small glass of champagne every New Year celebration. Though it still intrigued her — and it definitely didn’t stop Sydney from opening the can and taking a sip of the alcoholic liquid. It was cool, refreshing… pretty rubbish, but also the idea of letting loose for once in her life was so enticing.

For a second, Sydney paused in thought as something came to her realisation. “Hang on, how’d you even manage to buy it?”

“Syd, fake IDs are a thing and they’re very easy to replicate,” Jess stated very matter-of-factly, between laughs. Though Jess quickly corrected herself as she noted Sydney’s shocked expression, “Oh, my God, you are a priss! It’s just non-alcoholic cider, don’t worry. It’s far cheaper anyway.” Jess’ hand lightly pushed Sydney’s shoulder, cracking a smile from the other blonde’s features. “Still a total priss, though.” She smirked.

Sydney’s features relaxed a little — and then playfully frowned. “I am not!”

“You so are — you’re such a goody-two-shoes, Syd.”

Following Jess’ joke towards Sydney being a complete goody-goody, the two friends sat together in the stillness of the junkyard during the early evening for several moments, with only the occasional slurping or fizzing of the cider to break the silence. The sun was beginning to set into the clouds ahead of them and, subconsciously, Sydney leant in to rest her head on Jess’ shoulder. Aside from the birdsong in the far distance, all was quiet and still. It was peaceful; in contrast to when the pair would be smashing old junk up with a baseball bat to release their trapped emotions.

Jess was the first one to interrupt the calm: she jerked up suddenly, which in turn forced Sydney off her shoulder. “Hey, why don’t we talk about boys?” Jess pitched, and immediately received a sceptical look from Sydney, who raised her eyebrows. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t quite the question she expected to come from a lesbian. “Yeah, I’m well a-frickin’-ware it sounds counterproductive for me. But what about you? Any boys you fancy?”

Shoot, the one word that danced across Sydney’s mind as she internally panicked. Did she even like any boys? She knew plenty of boys at school; none of them she liked like that.

“C’mon, there must be someone,” prompted Jess. “Back in middle school, I pretended I had a crush on Bradley Winters for a few weeks… until he got boring. Like, hello, is football really ALL you assholes got? Because your looks definitely aren’t gonna get you anywhere.”

Sydney let out a tiny giggle at Jess’ recollection, but other than that, her mind raced as she desperately searched for a boy. Any boy she knew. God, why couldn’t she think of anyone? Was there really no boy who catches her eye in the corridor, or even gives her a tingly sensation of butterflies in her stomach? Either way, as long as she could pluck a boy out of thin air, she could get Jess off her case. And that was it.

“Well, there is oneeee,” Sydney finally replied, prolonging the last word to perhaps feign some lovey-dovey feeling of infatuation. As Sydney spoke, Jess’ attention was piqued and she non-verbally encouraged her to go on with a curious grin. “His name’s Joshua Smith — you know him?”

Jess’ smile faded. “You’re making that up! I’ve never even heard of him.”

This time it was true: Joshua was a very real student at Hawkins High; all Sydney had done was falsify her apparent crush on him. He was the first plausible boy to pop into her head so she might as well just roll with it. “He so is! Like you’ve heard of him anyway; don’t you skip over half of your classes?”

Jess seemed to ignore Sydney’s comment about her truancy, apart from a little indignant smirk that tugged on her lips. “Holy crap — it’s not that Aussie new kid, is it? Jesus dang christ, you could do so much better than him, he’s so ugly.”

“He’s so not!” Sydney defensively replied, nipping the inside of her lip slightly; a habit she developed so she wouldn’t visibly appear anxious to those around her. “I know it’s a total cliché to, like, fall for the new kid but… he’s a cutie.”

Raising her eyebrows with mock scepticism, a mischievous grin played upon Jess’ face as she sat up straight, and broke out into a stereotypical Australian accent. “G’day, Sydney, it’s Josh — oh, how I love ya, y’know?”

“You’re actually being ridiculous,” Sydney remarked, staring at Jess in amusement while failing to stifle her laughter. “He absolutely doesn’t sound like that, either!”

“Aw, c’mon it’s just a bit of fun,” Jess briefly reverted back to her natural accent before continuing with the mock impression, “C’mon, give us a kiss and we’ll go put a shrimp on the barbie.”

“This is so stupid, I’m not going to ki—”

“Kiss me, Sydney! C’mon, don’t leave a fella hangin’ here.”

Alright, well maybe to shut her up. Besides, what’s a kiss between two friends? Sydney sat up and shuffled about slightly before she slowly leaned in towards Jess. As their eyes met briefly, Sydney’s lips interlocked with Jess’. She didn’t know what she was doing; it was as though some mystical force had pulled them together.

There was a deafening silence between the couple of friends. To Sydney, it was as if the world froze for several moments.

However, the second they gradually pulled out of the kiss, Jess erupted into hysterical laughter at the sheer idea this was initiated through mindless banter between a couple of friends. As Jess jumped off the hood of the car, she had her back turned as she cackled as she recalled the past fifteen minutes playing out in her head.

Because Jess was lost in hysterics with her back turned, she was none-the-wiser to the faint blush that danced across Sydney’s cheeks — or the smile playing on her lips from the moment they pulled away from the kiss. Sydney remained cross-legged on the hood; she was just entirely lost in thought. Since meeting the rowdy and rebellious bad girl at the party, Sydney couldn’t have predicted that to happen. But holy crap, it was… nice. It wasn’t quite soft, but it left Sydney almost wanting to try it again.

But they were just friends, right?

xxxx━━━

author’s note, all of these aus are being developed with my girlfriend btw... literally. so we created a stranger things au set about a decade from the first series. and sydney/jess were born. they started hanging out over the summer... jess is an out(ed) lesbian, while sydney is presumably straight (she is not!)... and this kiss is only one of FOUR. they kiss four times, but it’s okay!! because they’re just friends!! we hate them both for this, and we only have ourselves to blame. this one-shot was also my first real dialogue practice!! i suck at it usually so... jess normally swears like a sailor but i obviously had to dim it down a little bit considering where this is being posted.

[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ FIRST KISS
au, buffy the vampire slayer (1997—2003) ━━ character, lauren gardner
word count, 872 ━━ date written, 09/06/2020 ━━ content warnings, none

Spending time with Ginny seemed to lift a weight off Lauren’s shoulders; she made Lauren feel things she hadn’t felt before with her other friends. Not that Emmie and Ethan wanted anything to do with her since the fights, one of which Lauren only had herself to blame. But with Ginny, Lauren legitimately felt something different — and it was something unfamiliar. From admiring Ginny’s spells in her bedroom at several overnight sleepovers, and Ginny joining her on nightly patrols for moral support: Lauren had this unfathomable appreciation for Ginny's company.

It was as though, when she needed a friend, Ginny was right there. Ginny’s popular friends had always been very welcoming from the moment they met Lauren, but it seemed like Ginny was the only one she truly clicked with.

Eyes locked with Ginny’s, the pair danced in sync as Lauren’s surroundings dissolved from around her. Colourful rainbow lights and wreaths that adorned the walls became a mere blur. Only the sound of Christmas music blaring from the speakers could be heard. Everyone around them appeared to evaporate to faceless teens chatting and dancing amongst themselves. It left only Ginny in front of Lauren, staring straight at each other as they moved rhythmically with the music. All of the attention was on her, and all of Lauren’s attention was on Ginny.

“You should let yourself go more often, you’re so much fun,” Ginny commented with a smile.

Lauren didn’t reply; only a smile tugged on her lips as Ginny spoke. Ginny was right — this is what fun felt like, she thought. An initially very reserved Slayer, who felt pressured to keep up with the legacy and job that was now her destiny, was lost in ecstasy — at a house party nonetheless. To think she managed to evade half of her patrol that night solely to attend Ginny’s Christmas party was a foreign concept. She was a completely new girl, but the thought of dodging her duties once in a while to hang out with Ginny was such a breath of fresh air.

“Angela is absolutely gonna kill me,” Lauren said plainly. She could already picture the look on her Watcher’s face when she discovers that, come tomorrow morning, Lauren dodged her patrol.

“Nah. She’ll probably be happy you finally went out, started acting like an actual teenager,” reassured Ginny, with a slight chuckle as she made the latter remark. “Isn’t she always telling you how she wants you to connect with more people?”

“Mm, I guess so,” mused Lauren. It definitely was true; more than once, her Watcher brought up how Lauren isn’t like “other Slayers” she’s known or trained. Oftentimes, Angela would pick up how Lauren appeared uninterested in boys in general, which was always met with Lauren defensively explaining how all the boys at Alexandria High were insanely boring. Except maybe Ethan, but no matter how close they’d get, there were no lingering butterflies or longing gazes.

There was a noticeable silence between the two girls where they were seemingly lost in the music playing in the background, as well as each other’s eyes. Since she befriended her, Lauren felt so comfortable around Ginny — but she was only realising that now, as they were gradually getting closer to each other. Nothing about it felt weird; to Lauren, it simply felt normal and comforting to have a friend you could completely be yourself around.

If they were just friends, why was Lauren beginning to lean instinctively towards Ginny for a kiss? She had never felt the urge to do that, and yet Ginny was somehow different. Their lips interlocked as they met in the middle with a kiss, their foreheads less than an inch apart from touching. God, Ginny’s lips were so soft. Was this how it’s meant to feel? It felt right, and it felt natural.

Most of all, Lauren’s stomach erupted with butterflies, even as they slowly pulled away from each other. It was only when she caught sight of Ginny’s widened eyes in shock that instantly Lauren snapped back to reality on Earth.

“Hey, what was that all about?” asked Ginny with a laugh. Lauren’s stomach plummeted.

Did she really just kiss the girl in front of her without thinking? Was one drink all she needed to have to become so dissociated that she initiated her first kiss with her new friend? Most importantly, Lauren could have potentially fractured a friendship — when her other friends fled the scene as soon as she entered the room. Did she really screw up again?

“I just — I just need some air, I think,” Lauren quietly gasped. Frantically turning around to squeeze a path through the crowd to the exit, she failed to catch a glimpse of the small smile forming upon Ginny’s mouth. It didn’t take much for Lauren’s anxiety to hit, and she couldn’t help her mind from consistently replaying the scene in her head. She just wanted fresh hair; she could easily talk to Ginny at school the following morning. As far as Lauren was concerned, she had kissed a girl without her permission and had ruined another friendship. The worst thing was that she enjoyed it — and that was the confusing thing.

xxxx━━━

author’s note, it’s useless sapphic week... apparently! this differs from the last drabble, because unlike sydney, at least lauren realises kissing is not (usually) a platonic action.

[yves]

‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ CEMETERY CONVERSATIONS
au, buffy the vampire slayer (1997—2003) ━━ character, lauren gardner
word count, 1,803 ━━ date written, 09/01/2021 ━━ content warnings, none

That night was a slow night, which was a change. Most of the time when Lauren was out patrolling, she would have encountered at least half a dozen vampires by now. Yet that night was different — there was an eerie quietness in the air, and Lauren was only an hour into her patrol. The navy sky stretched overhead with only a few stars sparkling; at eight in the evening, the surrounding street lamps were enough to dim a few stars. A slither of a waxing crescent moon hung in the very top, the little surface visible enough to reflect a bit of light.

The late-January atmosphere was a chilling one, and Lauren tugged at her jacket with her free hand — of course, her left hand still had a tight grip on her stake. The thought that they were already a month into 2009 just made Lauren realise just how long she and Emmie had been apart for. So much had happened in those four months — heck, Emmie even had a girlfriend now, and it was Julia, no less. Sure, Lauren was now on good terms with Julia (especially when she was the one to thank for coaxing the two best friends to make up), but it went to show how much can happen in such a short space of time.

It was why Lauren made the executive decision to invite Emmie to join her on patrol. They were best friends… they still are, and after four months, this was their first real opportunity to talk — just them, alone. As Lauren paced around the perimeter of the cemetery, she kept an eye out for any potential movement from the graves. On a night as quiet as this, aside from the occasional car driving past, it was relatively easy to listen out for vampires. Patrols were often boring when as quiet as this, but at least it left Lauren to have some time alone with her thoughts. She had been doing a lot of thinking recently… mainly about a certain someone in particular.

Not long after Lauren and Emmie had their first falling-out, Lauren befriended Alexandria High’s resident queen bee, Ginny Delvaux. It was a confusing time for Lauren — and it still was. She might have been the one to kiss Ginny at her Christmas party, but did she genuinely like her? Being with Ginny felt refreshing and unlike anything else; while she loved Emmie as her best friend, Ginny always seemed to be different. Everything about Ginny was like venturing into uncharted territory, and Lauren couldn’t establish what this was. It was something new — Lauren had never felt like this with a girl. In fact, she had never felt this at all; not even Ethan, the nicest possible guy, and someone Lauren definitely should have fallen for by now. But nothing was there. Not one ounce.

Just thinking about it made her anxiety twist and turn her stomach. It wasn’t that the prospect of potentially being gay repulsed her. Instead, the idea of simply not knowing terrified Lauren. She only realised she specifically had the option to like other girls when Julia accused her of having a crush on Emmie — which, looking back, perhaps there was some truth in that statement. The thought of it never occurred to her before. So with these new discoveries, it spooked Lauren. She just wanted Ginny as a friend, especially when Emmie nor Ethan weren’t talking to her, and she didn’t want to screw anything up with complicated romantic feelings. Though it backfired, and now Ginny wasn’t talking to her.

At least, not until Lauren figured it out — that’s what Ginny told her. Perhaps now Lauren had more of a clue, after a few weeks of being alone and lost in her thoughts. She didn’t want to lose Ginny, and she certainly wanted something more. And that was exactly Lauren’s ulterior motive when she invited Emmie to come and join her. She had to start somewhere, right, so why not tell her best friend? It can’t be that hard to tell your best friend you think you might be the tiniest little bit gay, surely.

Striding down the centre of the cemetery, Lauren immediately snapped back to reality when a silhouette came into her vision up ahead. As far as she could tell, it appeared to be running — but just as she instinctively clutched tighter on her stake, an average-sized blonde girl was revealed by a dim lamp in the graveyard. Just as Lauren was wondering where her friend had got to, Emmie finally arrived.

“Lauren! I—I’m sorry I’m late —” Emmie steadied her pace as she approached Lauren. After regaining her breath, Emmie continued, “I met this really nice girl — ghost — back at school. And we got talking. Oh, wow, I must’ve lost track of time. But she was so nice, Lauren! I wish I could show you… Oh, wow, I didn’t miss anything, did I?”

“It’s fine, honest, I’m just glad you came,” Lauren replied. “It’s been quiet so far, so nothing to miss — hey, walk with me for a bit?”

Emmie nodded enthusiastically. “Of course! Oh, wow, I’m so happy we’re friends again.”

Several minutes of wandering through the cemetery went by, in silence so as to concentrate on the subtle sounds the undead may create. If Lauren could just tell her now, that would be good. How come it was so hard? It wasn’t like she was confessing her love to Emmie. Lauren kept replaying the hypothetical scene in her head: why was it so easy for the idealised version of herself? If it was so easy like her mind kept telling her, why was she getting nauseating anxiety again? It was anything but easy.

Come on, Lauren, you can do this. Now? A beat. Or how about now? Damn it, the time isn’t going to come to you. You’ve got to seize the moment. Lauren squeezed her right hand into a fist, as if attempting to reassure herself. She bit her lip. Seize the moment.

“Hey, Em. There was — another reason why I wanted you to join me tonight,” gulped Lauren, after finally mustering up the courage to speak. She dug the initial hole; there was no dodging out of it now, especially not when Emmie visually perked up to signal she was listening. Coughing a little to clear her throat, she continued, “I just — I wanted to talk to you about — actually, um, could we sit down?” Hopefully, getting off her feet would ease her nerves just a little.

“Oh — oh, yeah. Of course,” Emmie responded after a brief pause. “What is it?”

Once the pair propped themselves up on the stone wall that ran the outline of the cemetery, Lauren was wrong. Her anxieties were still relentlessly churning inside her stomach. But she had to push through this, she was already this far in. “I just wanted to talk to you about something — about me —” Lauren started over from the beginning, the nervousness clear in her voice. Without realising, she found her hands gravitated towards fiddling with her stake in her lap. How was she going to get into this? “Well, um, do you know Ginny? I — uh — she’s in our grade.”

Another pause. Lauren knew Emmie couldn’t help taking longer than others to process information, but it didn’t stop her growing worry. Any silence, even for a split-second, and Lauren’s mind would wander to the worst possible outcome.

“She’s the girl you hang out with over the past few months, right?”

“Right,” Lauren said shortly, nodding along to Emmie’s comment. Her breath was noticeably shaky. “She and I started getting to know each other, and she’d often accompany me on patrols… that sort of thing.” Lauren took another breather, chewing at her bottom lip as she fought through her growing apprehension to continue. “And — and — you know, I — we started hanging out more… and I, um, started thinking about her more.” Just say the word, damn it. Why was it so hard? A single, three-letter word, yet it was so much easier to ramble on about Ginny to procrastinate actually confessing.

“I — what?” Emmie’s question rang through Lauren’s ears; honestly, she should have expected that puzzled look on her friend’s face.

“I mean that, um,” Lauren cleared her throat again, “I think I started to develop feelings —” Yet the look on Emmie’s face was still perplexed, as if she didn’t get it. God, please don’t make me say it. I can’t, I literally cannot. “Like — like… you know, um, with you and J—Julia.”

“Oh… you mean — those feelings?”

“Yeah… those… those feelings, yeah.” Lauren rolled her stake back and forth between her hands; she always had to keep her hands occupied whenever she felt like she was entering moments of sheer panic like this. Holding out for a second, she took a deep inhale before she launched into a quivering ramble, “But I’m just trying to… make sense of it all. I’ve never felt like this with any guy… I would’ve known if I had. It feels so new and different and it’s like, I have all these feelings for her and I, I don’t know what to do with them… A—And when I did, I screwed it all up, and now I don’t think she’s ever going to want anything to do with me… And I don’t know what to do, okay? I don’t want to lose this.”

Emmie didn’t vocalise anything — but there was a mere nod of understanding and sympathy. That was one of the best things about Emmie; she may not always be able to find the words to say, but something as simple as offering your unconditional love and physical presence was often even more effective than words. Lauren thought it was most likely because she frequently found herself in the same position of not being sure on what to say.

“Why don’t we just sit here,” came Emmie’s soft voice, reaching out to Lauren’s hand and squeezing in reassurance, “and deal with this later? We’ll get you that girl… I promise.” A smile tugged on her lips, and Lauren couldn’t help but return the gesture before mouthing “thank you” in reply. Lauren let out a long sigh of relief; at least one weight had been lifted off her chest. The girls sat in silence for several minutes, with Emmie leaning her head into the crook of Lauren’s shoulder. No words could explain the gratitude Lauren felt.

“Em?” Lauren broke the silence, although she didn’t let go of Emmie’s hand.

“What is it?”

“I’m so glad we’re friends again. I’ve missed you so much.”

“So have I.”

xxxx━━━

author’s note, ok now, this... THIS is my peak. i’m never going to top this, ever. i started it wednesday night and didn’t stop until 2am the next morning -- i swear. and the praise i’ve been receiving from this already... it just makes me so proud and i love this so much -- especially when a lot of this was drawn from my own personal experiences. 🥺💓 i also drew inspiration from alex’s coming out scene in supergirl (2x06), because i could really vividly see lauren struggling to say the word specifically... and just, that whole scene was beautiful and painfully realistic. i love it so much. i also realised how bad it sounds out of context -- my girlfriend’s oc emmie is not unfit, she’s just asthmatic.