♃ Life is a conundrum || Journey of a Genius

[Adonis]

I love to make you smile.

[Adonis]

It's always a mess when the heart and the mind are in conflict. Whether it be when faced with the idea of something or a course of action.
It's always a mess.

[Adonis]

It's hard for me to say...but Im jealous of the way..your happy without me..

[Adonis]

we don't have the talks we used to but... I'm happy your life is going well.

[Adonis]

Im very hard
(to understand)
sometimes..

[Adonis]

Tell me what to do...I don't know what to do, your love is just a memory

[Adonis]

There was a girl. Fresh faced and beautiful with a waterfall of almond cascading down her head. Like a bird she soared from place to place , ever drawn by something intangible and yet very real. It beckoned to her, made her restless whenever still for too long and made sure close ties were never created.

This thing was born of her innate curiosity and desire to experience all life had to offer. At the age of 24 she'd seen more of the world than anyone of the small town she'd flew from so many years ago.

There was a boy. He was of equally youthful features with raven hair and hazel eyes. All he knew for his entire life was his city and his family. That's all he planned to know. He worked a stable but low income job but he was content. He was always content.

The woman sat alone at a candle-lit table at the restaurant he worker in. As he stopped by her table, pen and paper in hand, the woman felt the ever familiar feeling that kept her traveling as she looked into his eyes. For a brief moment, something called her to him.

As much as she hated to admit it, she spent a second too long staring into his eyes, and the man asked twice if she was ready to order.

That night, as she strolled through the dimly lit sidewalk towards her apartment something pulled her backwards and a palm muffled her screams. Her legs kicked out in vain as her unknown but presumably large assailant proceeded to carry her a certain distance. She was absolutely powerless in his grip.

A loud call stopped the man, and in another instant she was thrown onto the pavement, gasping for air. Before her the waiter from earlier exchanged blows with a broad shouldered, middle aged man. He was powerfully built but the waiter ducked and evaded blows that would knock him unconscious.

Every muscle in her body screamed for her to run, yet instead she flung herself at the man, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him back. Allowing the waiter to land a blow that sent the brute to the concrete.

The bruised waiter accompanied her to the hotel, where they exchanged words and bid each other good night.

For a week the woman would continue to visit the restaurant and for a week he would walk her to the hotel. All the while they grew closer until eventually the man and woman would come to the restaurant together and arriving at the hotel didn't mean they parted ways for the day.

She figured she had finally found something worth sticking around for. And he found that his day to day life was...interesting for once.

But the call of the wild beckoned her once more. While she had become accustomed to familiarity and simple life... it sapped her energy.

Gone was the spark of new love between them. It was replaced by unspoken bitterness and unhappiness. One morning, almost a year since their fateful encounter, the woman asked the man to travel with her. To experience all that she did. An wanted to travel with him for rest of her life.

And a part of him did too. But he was rooted in his home and he could see staying there was inwardly killing her. His declination destroyed her because of what it entailed. That night it rained outside of the small New York apartment as they fell asleep, holding each other for one last time.

She awoke as moonlight still filtered through their window. Everything she owned, including his heart, went out the door 10 minutes later. She knew couldn't say goodbye, it would destroy what was left of her.

As the sun arose, the mans lips parted to greet someone who was not there. And he wept for hours.

Gathering a hold on himself the man looked out the window towards the setting sun.

"Goodbye, my sparrow."

[Adonis]

im shaking

[Adonis]

i dreamed about you twice.

Is it bad I wanna dream about you again?

[Adonis]

Maybe you are my new goal.

All this time i motivated myself thinking about them...maybe I needed more.