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[BookAuthor]

Chapter Nine
As soon as Colton was out of sight, I ran after Cole and Matt. It took me a few minutes to find them, but I didn’t care. I hardly care about small things like that anymore. When I have finally found them, I slow to a walk. They have their backs to me, but I can hear them talking.
“… Hate him,” Matt says with frustration and anger. “He is just… ugh!”
“Matt, calm down. Focus on the more important thing right now. We need to protect her from more dangerous things,” Cole says sharply, his temper rising. Then he whispers softly, as if the forest shouldn’t even hear him, “She is the last true one of us. The pure silver-white come to save us all or to leave us to die.”
“But what if she doesn’t help us, what if fear overcomes her as it did her mother and she abandons us for the safety of her boyfriend’s arms?” Matt whispers just as softly. His voice trembles with a fear that I have never heard him have. His lip quivers, waiting for Cole to give him the reassuring answer he needs but all he receives is a loud silence. He looks over at Cole with wide and frightened gray-blue eyes. Cole sighs and rests his hand on Matt’s shoulder.
“Listen, I can’t guarantee that she won’t but I have known her longer than you have and she wouldn’t do that kind of thing, especially when her friend’s lives may depend on it,” Cole says at last with a solemn voice, which reaches into the deepest depths of my soul and frightens me. I knew that they were talking about me, but why was I the one sent here to do this. Why couldn’t it have been some other, stronger and more prepared girl? Then as I recall Matt’s scared eyes, I realize why they look so familiar. They also belonged to the small black wolf. Matt was, is, the small black wolf. That must mean Cole is the large golden wolf. That explains so many things, their wolfish grins, their speed, and their cunning smarts.
If they were also wolfani though, maybe that meant they could help prepare me for whatever I was going to have to do. I step out from behind the tree and to announce my presence, I slip off my dress and shift into a wolf. Barking, I pad up to them. “Listen, don’t deny anything, please just listen. I know that you are both like me, and can understand me as well. I have been listening to you for a few minutes,” they give me suspicious and accusing looks but I continue “and even though that is very rude and wrong, I have formed an idea that might benefit us all.” I finish opening up a silence for them to fill.
“What is this idea of yours,” Cole asks in a voice that lacks both emotion and volume. His green eyes sparkle dimly, but hide very well what he is feeling. I look over at Matt. His face is a mixture of emotions, surprise, scrutiny, anger, and happiness all at once.
“Give me a moment to change back and I will tell you.” I walk back into where I left my dress and when they turn away, I shift back and redress. Walking back around to where they are sitting, I begin. “Well,” my voice quavers hesitantly as my eyes dart between the two of them. “I thought that maybe you two could teach me.”
“Teach you what,” Cole asks in the same voice. I am quick to reply.
“Anything, everything,” I say, my eyes burning brightly with excitement. I see their faces shimmer with excitement and knowledge. “Will you? Please?” I plead softly.
“I will,” Matt says quickly as I had hoped he would. I lick his hand in gratitude and he smiles genuinely. I try to smile back but it comes out all wrong on a wolf face. Matt laughs and nudges Cole in the ribs. “Com’on Cole-y,” he pleads, giving him puppy wolf eyes.
“Fine, but only when I am not busy,” Cole says softening towards me again. I smile at him and kiss him on his right cheek. He smells like sage and the forest. When I pull away, his cheeks are flushed the color of roses and he reaches a hand up to where my lips touched his soft, smooth skin. “Why…” he begins softly looking deeply into my eyes, his hinting at confusion.
“Because, Not only have you agreed to teach me, but you saved my life and have given me a chance,” I say gently touching his hand with mine. Then I turn to both of them. “When can I start?” I smile questioningly and Matt gets up.
“I am busy all this week… but we can start sometime next week together,” the Cole I know says, cheeks still flushed
“You can start with me right now,” he eagerly puts in. I smile and nod a yes. Matt smiles back and then says, “Ready?”
I slip my dress off of my shoulders and as soon as it hits the ground, I shift. When I look up, Matt is staring at me wide-eyed and still human. Angry and embarrassed, I bite his leg and growls.
“Alright, alright,” He says, changing without even bothering to take his clothes off. I snarl in warning and then playfully bark.
“Let’s get started!” I yip happily almost forgetting what just happened. I sprint ahead of him and then wait for him to catch up. I shake my head as the gentle and cold fingers of the wind play with my ears.
“First thing you need to know, is never abandon your pack, unless they tell you to,” he says panting angrily. I smile innocently and nod. “The next thing I am going to teach you is how to fight and how to hunt properly. Like a wolf.” He lifts his nose and smells the cold air. Then he points his head in the direction of what he smelled. “See if you can smell what I did,” he instructs slowly. I lift my muzzle and smell with my wet wolf nose. At first I think I can’t do it but then faintly, I smell the scent of an old moose. I point my nose in the direction of the scent and Matt nods happily. He sees the light in my eyes and his reflect it back. “Good. You have a natural instinct and love for hunting like all wolves. Now lead me to our prey.”
“My pleasure,” I declare with a lust for the hunt in my voice. I take off at a full out sprint and barely feel my paws hit the ground. The world flashes around me quickly and the wind whistles through my fur once again. I feel oblivious to everything around me except for the moose and Matt.

When I am done ‘training’ with Matt, I am tired but flushed with excitement. I have never felt so great in all my life. I look over at him and see my face reflected in his. He must love this. I wonder if he or Cole ever regret turning back human, so I ask.
“No. I don’t,” Matt says after pondering that for a moment. His voice is tender and hides the deeper meaning of his words. I look more closely at him. His black fur is so dark that it reflects everything off of it like a mirror. It reminds me of how secluded from humans he is. I wonder why he doesn’t mind.
“Why? Why don’t you just stay like this forever?” I inquire curiously. “Why?”
“Because, if I stay like this, we would have never met and I wouldn’t be able to see you,” Matt says softly. I gasp in spite of myself. “I love you,” he says to me, turning human.
“Wha… What?” I ask taken by surprise. I never knew that. I mean I knew he liked me as a friend and maybe slightly more, but love? That is a very strong word. “Matt…” I say warningly. I grasp my dress and shift back as well. I pull on my dress and when I look back at Matt, somehow he found a pair of pants and put them on.
“I love you Bekah,” he says cutting me off. Then I step towards him involuntarily. He embraces me and holds me to himself, first kissing my neck then my chin and finally my lips. Then he slips my dress off of my shoulders. I am so in shock that I am frozen and don’t know what to do. He kisses me again on the lips and then kisses down my neck, towards my partially exposed chest. I get control of myself and I push him away and slap him across the face, pulling my dress back on properly.
“Matt, I can’t do this,” I say changing back, not changing in light of what just happened. When he starts to protest I stop him. “NO! Get away from me!” I growl fiercely. Then I whirl around and run away from him, faster than I have ever run before. I don’t know where I am going to, but it won’t be anywhere near Matt. My legs pump beneath me and I fly. Images rush through my head. What just happened, I ask myself. Do I love him? Why did I let him do that? I can’t answer any of those questions, which pains me. Then I see my plan of escape. I am going to the one safe place I know. Colton’s arms. I turn left and stop by my clearing. I grab the satchel I hid there in my mouth and then continue on in the direction I was going. My lungs burn and I slow slightly, but stay strong. When I reach town, I change back to human and put on one of my nice dresses. Then I run the rest of the way to Colton’s house in my chilled bare feet.

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Ten
When I reach his front door, I knock nervously. Thankfully he answers the door. I run into his arms before he says anything and begin to cry.
“What’s wrong?” He asks pulling me off of him. I wipe away my messy tears and tell him that things haven’t been going well at home and that I was having some problems with my friends. Not a lie, just not the whole truth.
“Shhh…” Colton comforts me, “why don’t you come inside. I’ll make you a glass of tea and we can talk.” I smile. Colton believed that a cup of tea could help ease any sorrow. I must admit though, sometimes it did help a little bit.
“Okay,” I say, my voice shaking slightly, and grabbing my hand he leads me into his kitchen and pulls out a chair for me. I sit in it and smile lovingly at him. He puts a kettle on the stove and rewarms some water for tea. The kettle whistles loudly announcing that my tea is almost done. I stand up and watch Colton make it. He puts the herbs into a small cloth pouch and then puts that into a cup of the heated water.
“Here you are princess,” he says bowing to me and then handing me the cup. “So, what’s up?” he asks. “I haven’t seen you as much lately…” he says leaving it open-ended for me to answer. I freeze up. Can I trust him with my secret? I could if I loved him right? But…
“I honestly don’t know. Things have been rough. I barely seem to know what’s going on around here,” I sigh. “Wait what time is it?” I ask aware that the sun seems to be rising, even though he is wide awake and so am I.
“Sunrise. So what do you want to talk about?” He replies studying me carefully, as if he is trying to assess my problems like a doctor of the Sorrowful Times would have. I barely keep from gaping. I had stayed out all evening and night with Matt. It had only seemed like an hour or two! I sigh and rest me head in my empty hand. I take a sip of tea and it is as delicious as ever. Colton even added a small bit of mint, just like I always ask him to. He must think he knows me really well. But what don’t we know about each other? Like my secret, what is his?
“How about each other?” I ask. He looks shocked and then hides it.
“Sure. What do you want to know about me?” he asks leaning back in his chair and smiling at me warmly. I sit up straighter and rest my hand upon his and feel that tingling sensation that always comes with it
“Everything that you will tell me,” I tell him, looking into his eyes and encouraging him. He smiles and begins to pour out his story, as if he has been waiting forever and a day to tell someone all of this.

After we are done talking and each having finished two cups of tea, we walk slowly to school together, enjoying the crisp fall weather. When we get there, Colton slips from my side to talk to Ms. McBauerman about yesterday’s lessons. Right then, Kelsey stands and goes up too. Curiously and suspiciously, I watch them. When Kelsey reaches Colton’s side she gently touched his bicep and then stands on her tip-toes and whispers something in his ear and giggles flirtatiously. Colton laughs too and I feel my cheeks flush with anger. Her lips brush his ear as she pulls away and I feel the tips of my ears go cherry red. I sit and sulk angrily in my chair and give Kelsey a you-are-so-dead look that she doesn’t see.

It goes on like that at school, Kelsey flirting with Colton and Colton possibly enjoying it for a few weeks. But while they are busy wasting their time, Cole and Matt are training me, no prize for guessing why. I prefer to train without Matt, but after I told Cole what had happened and seen the punishment Matt got, I am okay around him. We are all really good friends, but Cole and I are especially close. We both have lost our mothers who were also both wolfani as well, our parents are both dating again, and Cole and I have been friends for a long time. He and Colton have been my friends for at least 9 years. During those few weeks, I had never felt as hurt and alive as I did then.
As of now I am standing at the edge of the village square where they hold meetings arguing with my dad, during one of those meetings.
“Why can’t you stop being so self-centered and selfish for once?” He whispers harshly to me his eyes angry and tired. I feel as if I have been slapped across the face with his angry words. Tears sprout in my eyes but I force them away, willing myself not to look like a child in front of him.
“I hate you Mick. You may think all of those things about me, but you have never once taken into consideration my opinion on things,” my words lash out like a whip with a poisonous sting. I know they work by the small flash of pain that I manage to catch a glimpse of. I vow never to call him dad again because he isn’t anymore, not truly anyway.
“Like what?” Mick asks me. He is honestly clueless about what he is doing wrong.
“You deciding to marry Gina and move in with her, getting rid of all of Mom’s stuff except for what I saved, and a whole bunch more!” I say more loudly that I meant to but no one seems to notice. I decide to use the worst of my weapons, “Do you even love me, Mick? Do you even still love Mom?” I say softly and see tears in his eyes. I turn sharply on my heel and then walk into the crowd. The meeting was almost done so I waited patiently. Then when it is over, I step upon the steps where we can come to say something. “STOP!” I shout out to the crowd. They all turn and look at me and I see everyone from Chinook. Even my friends. I was no longer going to keep secrets so I began in a loud voice. “Mick, I am giving you one last chance to redeem yourself. You can either have Gina or you can have me, you cannot have us both. I swear an oath on my grave, that if you choose Gina, I shall disown you forever and our neighbors are the witnesses who shall carry out the oath, shall I fail to keep it.” I say rage filling my voice with power and authority. I scan the crowd and see a mixture of both scared and awe-filled faces. Continuing on I decide that I can no longer hid what or who I am. “I also have something to show everyone here.” I say confidently, knowing that it is too late to turn back. I look deep into Colton’s eyes and mouth ‘I love you’ and then I show them the other me.
People scream and some faint. I look at Colton and see that he has disappeared from the crowd, but my dad is still here. I turn around hide behind the column and change back and slip on my torn up dress. Walking back out to the crowd, I once again speak. “I am one of them, yes. There are others too. But we do not mean you harm. We want to work together and to live in peace. If this is not to be, then we shall fight.” I say and then I hear a shuffle of feet and suck in my cheeks as I feel a pain even worse than the one I felt during the eclipse. It shoots through my stomach and I cry out and collapse. The last this I see before I hit the ground and black out is a female figure fleeing in the shadows of the trees.

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Eleven
I wake up and see a strange setting around me. Familiar faces walk past me occasionally but I can’t place names on them. I feel lonely and my stomach hurts and I look down. I see a large bandage around my midsection and I see another one similar in a waste basket soaked in a dried crimson red liquid. I realize that it is blood and shortly after that, that it is mine.
“What happened to me,” I puzzle aloud. Then I all comes back to me in a flood of memories. The redheaded girl who stabbed me, fleeing with a familiar but disgusting grace, my head hitting the beautiful city hall stairs, seeing red and then black and finally feeling no more of the vicious pain that gnawed on my insides. That pain had now subsided to a throbbing with occasional flashes of terror and hurt.
Then I see a feminine face that is disgustingly familiar. The thin-lipped mouth on the face curls up into an evil snarl of dominance.
“Well, well, well, look who isn’t as invincible as we thought,” Hannah laughs meanly into my face. I fake cough and she backs up, disgusted and I smile. “You better watch it,” she shakily barks at me, with fear dripping in her voice.
“I think you have more problems to worry about besides me right now,” I say before another flash of pain comes on and I scream, alerting a nurse who runs into the room. She sees Hannah and yells for help. Hannah gives me one last dirty look and then swiftly disappears from the room.
Then as the nurse leaves, satisfied that I am alright, Elisha walks in with tear filled eyes. I immediately know something is wrong with her and Justin because she would never be so upset about anything else.
“What’s wrong Elisha?” I ask putting my hand gently on her arm. She sits on my hospital bed and cries harder into my pillow. She tries to say something but it comes out as a blubbery mush of tears and undecipherable words. It takes a minute, but she eventually calms down enough to tell me.
“Jjj… Justin… bbbroke… broke…. He broke up with me…” she chokes out and then breaks down sobbing. I hug her tightly and comfortingly and mumble that everything will be okay as I cry with her. She slowly dries her tears.
“Why? You two were so perfect together! I thought that when you turned 20 spins old, you two were going to marry!” I exclaim when we both have stopped crying. Her eyes glimmer with tears again.
“I thought so too, but we got into a huge fight over something so stupid I can’t even remember what is. Then he said that things weren’t working out and that we needed to take a short break and then after hunting I see him fawning over Hannah” Elisha says despairingly. “She was sitting in his lap and he kissed her nose. And then she laughed about something he said and then they were like practically making out and doing things married couples do,” she said throwing her hands up in the air, defeated and upset and angry.
“I am so sorry,” I say softly, fixing her hair and putting a flower from my bedside vase in it. “Now go make him miss all that he had and make him regret every second he spent away from you,” I say playfully pushing her off of my bed.
“You know what? I think I will,” Elisha exclaims confidently, eyes glowing. I smile after her and give her supportive thumbs up as she rushes quickly out of my room. I smile to myself and then drift off into a peaceful sleep.

Over the next few days, a few people stop by to see me, mainly Matt, Cole, and Elisha. I think I have forgiven Matt for what he did because he has been so kind and understanding. SO has Elisha, but Cole out shines them all in that category. He has visited me nearly every day that I am aware of and maybe even when I am asleep or in fits of pain, like yesterday.
I was having one of the worst since I had gotten here, and as I writhed in pain, I felt a strong, steady hand interlocked in mine, strengthening me and keeping me from letting go to this life. I know that it was him. Colton hasn’t visited since the village meeting. It saddens me, but I know that he might need time to comprehend what he saw.
Today, Cole sits by me telling me stories of our history, the history of wolfani I mean. “… He jumped on the bears back and then barked at her to leave,” he says telling me of Tamara and Ky, two lovers, one wolf and one wolfani. “She didn’t want to but it was the only way one of them would live. ‘I love you, I always have and I always will’ they both cry out in unison. Then turning away to flee, she runs trying not to hear the hideous screams coming from the two battling creatures and the blood specking her coat.” That line the two wolves say hits me hard like a rock in the stomach. That is what Colton had said to me. Did he truly mean it like those wolves had? Did I love him like that? I sigh sadly, at both the sadness of the story and the complicatedness of life. Cole smiles understandingly at me.
“Tell me another,” I say, hooked on his enchanting words, as if they paint a scene right before my very eyes. He obliges and I grasp onto every word he says. Then the story takes an unpredicted turn and I grab his hand. He looks surprised but doesn’t pull away. I squeeze his hand when dramatic or scary parts happen in the story and he reassuringly squeezes my hand back. When he is done with the story, I realize that I am still holding his hand. I blush and try to apologize but he stops me.
“Don’t apologize,” Cole says standing up but not releasing my hand. “I enjoyed today,” he says pulling my hand to his lips and kissing it, and before I can say anything or even blink, he stealthily slips from the room and disappears. I sit up, touching my hand where he kissed it and recalling the warm feeling it gave me inside my heart, like a small fire was burning.

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Twelve
The nurse says I will be getting out soon. I hope that she is right. I hate it here, being confined in one place. I long to stretch my legs and to run to the edge of the earth and back, even though there isn’t an end to the earth. It’s just one big sphere, the way it’s been for over fifteen thousand years.
When Cole visits, and we hold hands, I forget that I am in the village hospital and together, we run through the woods, hunting a herd of deer and sharing our kill. Cole is my connection to life. Without him, I don’t know what I would do. I would probably go insane.
Colton still hasn’t visited me. I thought he would have by now but he hasn’t. I find out when Elisha stops by. I am sitting bored in bed when she shows up, obviously ecstatic about something.
“Guess what?!?!” Elisha squeals happily, not waiting for my reply. “Justin and I got back together!” I perk up at hearing this.
“Really? Congrats!!!” I say smiling. I had hoped they would. They are so perfect for each other, like two pieces of a puzzle, they just connect perfectly. Then I see the happiness drain from her face and her voice. “What’s wrong?” I ask frantic. I am afraid that she is hurt or having a stroke.
“Oh,” she says her voice flat and unlike her normal voice. “It’s about Colton.” She whispers so softly I almost don’t hear her. “He and Kelsey have been hanging out a lot and she kissed him. Like French kissed him,” She says, her voice quavering, eyes scared and hurt. Continuing on she says, “He didn’t push her away. And he kissed her back…” she breaks down sobbing.
“When did this happen?” I ask wanting to know more.
“Oh Bekah, I am so sorry. I didn’t tell you earlier because I was afraid…” Elisha says guiltily. “It happened… It happened on his birthday…” She shakes with ragged sobs. “She said that it was a gift and a preview of what could be…” I fume with anger. Not towards Elisha, but to Colton and Kelsey. I fit all the puzzle pieces together. Kelsey had been the one that had stabbed me. That is why the fleeing girl had looked so familiar. She had done it because she was so jealous of me and Colton. Kelsey had been one of my good friends, or so I had thought. She just got close to me so it would hurt me more.
And then there was Colton. Colton who hadn’t come to visit me, Colton who laughed at Kelsey’s flirty jokes, Colton who let Kelsey kiss him and kissed her back, that same Colton, had told me a moon cycle ago, “I love you. I always have and always will." Look where we were now. I begin to cry, softly at first, then slowly my tears build up into sobs, and my sobs build up into hysterics. Elisha just sits there, comforting me like I did her when she and Justin broke up.
Then, with adrenaline from anger coursing through my veins, I get out of the bed, slip on my dress and smack Elisha when she tries to stop me. I run out if the building before anyone can stop me and head for where Colton’s scent leads me. I find him sitting in the forest, talking to Kelsey. My anger builds more but I wait for her to leave. I don’t want to give her the satisfaction of seeing or hearing how she has ruined my life.

When Kelsey finally does leave, after kissing Colton passionately, I wait until I am sure she is gone, and then I step out from my hiding spot. I silently walk up behind Colton and then I spin him around to face me.
“What the…” he almost swears, but when he sees that it is me, the blood drains from his face more quickly than I thought possible. “What are you doing here sweetheart?” he asks me, trying to regain his composure. I nearly blow my top when he calls me sweetheart.
“Don’t you dare sweetheart me you lying, cheating…” I fume angrily at his lies and deception. I don’t get to continue my sentence because he pulls me close and kisses me like Kelsey and he had a moment ago. That snapped my last nerve. I push him away and punch him as hard as I can in his stomach. He gasps for air as it all whooshes out of his lungs. “You jerk! You kissed Kelsey that way and now me? What happened to my boyfriend when I got hurt? Oh that’s right; you were too busy making out with Kelsey, the one who stabbed me, to come visit me in the hospital.” I say pushing him back away from me again. You were too busy cheating on me to even care. You were too busy with Kelsey to even break up with me!!” That last line stung both of us pretty hard. Tears roll down my cheeks are they threaten to on his face.
“Well... umm… uh…” Colton says fumbling for the right words. “Kelsey wouldn’t have yelled at me if this happened to her,” he retorts triumphantly. I snap out of my tears and slap him across the face.
“That’s because she just wants your lips and your touch and to make me miserable!” I say pushing him back one final time. He falls into a pile of damp leaves. I shift and run away as fast as I can to my cave. I sit there crying, crying because of Colton, because of life and because love stinks.

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Thirteen
After a few minutes, I hear a strange sound outside the cave. I dry my cheeks with my sleeves and pause, listening intently. I hear it again, it sounds like something is hitting the side of the mountain, near my cave. I hesitantly stand up and peer through a break in the vines hiding my cave. I see a wolf and I walk out. I hold my breath waiting for it to make the first move.
Instead of growling and threatening me like I thought it would, it backs up, surprised and then barks playfully at me like a puppy, the bark having no meaning. I frown puzzled and then realize that it is Cole. His maw is bloody but that only shows that he has been recently hunting.
“How did you find me?” I ask him curiously as I invite him into my secret cave. His eyes glow with amazement at what he was seeing. Then after a moment of drinking in his surroundings, he snaps back to reality and hears my question.
“Oh… I heard loud voices and followed your scent but then it disappeared into the mountain… It confused me so much.” Cole admits ashamedly. I smile and decide since he already has found and entered my secret hiding place, I might as well show him everything.
“Come on,” I call to him standing up. Without saying another word, I transform into my more flattering wolfani form and jump into the pond. Not looking back to see if his if following me, I gulp a large amount of air and then holding it, I dive under the surface and feel the warm water hit my face. I dive deeper and then swim through the tunnel. I reemerge in my secret cove and I smile, letting bubbles sneak past my maw and my face. I paw at them and pop most of them and then resurface when my lungs start to burn. I swim to the shore and see Cole behind me, gasping for breath.
Laughing I stand up on the shore and shake the water out of my fur. “You alright there, Cole-y?” I playfully ask him, using the pet name I have always used since we were kids. He rolls his eyes and sighs at me. I pout and then look around at my haven. It is just as beautiful as before if not more. I look around and then back at Cole. He is looking up and I am confused and I bark at him.
“Look at the ceiling,” he says sharply not moving his gaze. I follow it and gasp in amazement. On the ceiling of my cove, thousands upon thousands of crystals shine and glint moonlight that pours in from a small opening. The sight takes my breath away, and I stare, open-mouthed at the beauty of it.
“Wow…” I say after many moments of silence. “I have never seen those before…” I confess. Cole doesn’t move stop looking up but still replies to me.
“Really,” He asks, both surprised and sarcastic. “They are beautiful… Just like you…” he says more sincerely. My eyes go wide and he finally stops looking at the ceiling to gaze warmly and kindly into my eyes. It makes me melt and my heart pounds so fast and hard, I think that it might pop out of my chest. The only time I had felt this way was when Colton held me. Except right now, all it took for Cole to make me feel like that was that look.
Suddenly, I feel lightheaded as the adrenaline once fueling finally runs out and leaves me weak and vulnerable. My legs feel like jelly and I fall weakly to the ground. My head thuds heavily against the stone floor and I see lights flash across my vision before the familiar black void returns.

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Fourteen
When I open my eyes, I am at the hospital again. Thankfully, I feel stronger and don’t have a throbbing headache or a constant flash of pain. I sit up and see the nurse.
“How are you feeling Bekah?” she asks me. I recognize her as Suzan the same woman who cared for me last time and who lives a few houses down from my dad. She smiles warmly at me and I smile back.
“I feel great actually.” I admit happily, wiggling my toes.
“That’s great!” Suzan says enthusiastically. “We might let you out today…” I perk up and she notices. “Just behave yourself, don’t pull any foolish stunts and then you’ll be out!” she says cheerily exiting the room. I smile happily to myself and daydream.

I get out that afternoon. It is joyous to finally be free again. I spin around drunk on happiness and nearly fall over. I am caught by masculine arms and when I look up to see my rescuer’s face I see Matt. I stand up quickly and brush myself off, blushing in spite of myself.
“Hey, there’s a face I haven’t seen out here for a while. How hospital life been?” Matt says teasingly. He cocks his eyebrows and tucks a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. He smiles when I push his had away and I blush more.
“Hello Matt,” I say calmly, trying not to let my emotions take control of me. I long to feel his strong embrace again, to run my fingers through his hair, to… Wait, what am I saying? Focus. Control the emotions. I breathe in deeply and then realize that Matt is talking again.
“… It’s been… Less eventful without you here...” he finishes saying with a smile on his face still, but a somber tone of voice. “You really need to be more careful…” he whispers in my ear, and I get shivers down my spine. “I won’t always be there to protect you.” My anger flares up and it breaks through, causing me to snap back.
“Maybe I don’t need your help,” I say angrily and immediately regret my words. “Matt…” I begin so softly I barely hear myself. “I am so sorry Matt. I am just so tired of being treated like a child.”
“I wasn’t treating you like a child Bekah. Do you think I would honestly do this if you were a child?” Matt says, hurt flaring in his eyes. Tears rim the edges of mine. He turns to leave but I manage to put my hand on his shoulder before he can.
“Matt, don’t go. Please. I have already messed up so many things this past moon cycle and I don’t know how much more I can bear. I already messed it up with Colton; please don’t let it happen with you or Cole too…” I plead, resting my other had on his and then interlacing our fingers. He relaxes and then turns to face me.
“Bekah…” Matt says softly and I can’t catch his tone. I wait softly and silently hoping that he will fill the silence and continue. “You could never push me away. I would never leave unless you truly wanted me to and told me at least ten times,” he says laughing as he finishes. I laugh too and he kisses my cheek .Not like he did that one night, just gently and with warm lips, like the kiss the sunlight gives to my skin when it rarely shines.

Matt and I talk for a while and I remember how good of friends we used to be, before we grew up. I laugh at all of his jokes and he laughs at all of mine. Maybe If I hadn’t been so blind, thinks could have been like this a long time ago. I shake the thought out of my head, concentrating on enjoying the moment while it lasts.
We sit there and watch the clouds change colors and I lay my head on his shoulder. He gently wraps his arm around my waist and I relax against him. I close my eyes and slowly, I fall asleep in his warm embrace

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Fifteen
The next morning, I find myself alone and cold. The wind icily claws at my bare skin and chills me to the bone. I shiver and hug my knees to my chest. I stand up and realize that I still need to go to school. I numbly walk there and unusually get there just with everyone else, right on time. I shake myself out of my funk and then sit at my desk. Colton ignores me when I look at him but I can feel his gaze on me whenever I turn away. It isn’t one of hate or anger really, but more one of curiosity. I don’t look back or say anything; I just pay attention in class. My eyes dart from Ms. McBauerman to Cole to Kelsey, a different expression in my eyes for each of them. Ms. McBauerman gets one of respect, attentiveness, and admiration. Cole obviously gets one of warmth and friendship if not one of love. But Kelsey gets none of these things. My look at her is one of hatred, pouring out endlessly like a waterfall, not only for her but Hannah as well. My look says you-better-watch-it-girl. Then I turn back and focus on the lesson, trying to ignore Colton and all of my other miscellaneous thoughts.
When class finally ends, I gather up my supplies as quickly as I can and put them back in my cubby. Then I rush towards the door only to be stopped by Hannah and Kelsey. “What’s the matter Bekah? Are you just so smelly that even a bath can’t take it away? Tsk, tsk, tsk.” Hannah taunts meanly and evilly.
“And look at your hair? What did you do? Sleep in the forest?” Kelsey puts in with a smirk on her face. They make me so angry that my ears turn red as well as my cheeks. I can’t find a good comeback so instead I ball my hand up into a fist and slug Kelsey in the face. As my hand collides with her jaw, I hear the sound of bone snapping and they aren’t mine. I smile triumphantly and slug Hannah in the nose as Kelsey stumbles out of the way. I hear the same sound again and see blood on my fist. My hand hurts and is slightly bleeding but most of the blood is from Hannah’s nose. Hannah frantically moves out of my way and I gracefully walk out the door.
“You’ll pay for this!!!” Hannah says but her words are hindered by the blood spilling into her mouth so it sounds more like “Yull favor fis” but I get what she means. I flip my hair and turn my head to look back at them.
“No I won’t. This was just settling a due from earlier, but Kelsey’s isn’t all the way paid off,” I say threatingly, not actually intending to do that again. They obviously don’t know that though, because their eyes widen, Kelsey’s to the size of the moon.
I strut victoriously away and then run into someone. “Off,” he says, the voice giving away his gender. It sounds a little bit familiar but I can’t place it in the heat of the moment.
“Oh I am so sorry!!!” I cry out back up a few steps to allow him room to turn around. I hear him laugh and it confuses me but I understand when I see his face. It is Colton.
“Its okay,” Colton says to me, smiling as if he has just heard a really funny joke. I raise my eyebrows questioningly and he ignores them, but changes the subject, speaking with a more serious tone and look. “Listen, Bekah,” he begins softly. “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean all of those horrible things I said in the forest that night. You were right about everything. Kelsey just wanted to show me off like a prize to you and I was just being a stupid idiotic jerk,” one tear runs down his cheek and I brush it away, moved by his words, remembering what we used to have, and wanting that so badly. He is silent and I take advantage of that, laying my palm on his cheek comfortingly.
“Prove it. Prove to me that you are sorry. You can’t just come crawling back to me and expect me to take you back at the drop of a hat,” I say coldly, hiding my rushing emotions. “I need to see that I can really trust you. You have already broken my heart once; I don’t want it to happen again.” His eyes widen and plead with me.
“How can I prove it to you Bekah?” He asks me, pleadingly. I don’t know. I want him to beg, to plead on his knees, or to something like that.
“Beg me and show me how much you love me, tell me how much you love me, make me believe you,” I instruct him, trying not to soften to him yet, even though I already know that I will because I still love him deep down in my heart. He searches my eyes, trying to find what he knows is hidden within them, but I tuck it away, making him pay for what he has done.
“I am so sorry Bekah, never meant to hurt you, to hurt anyone. I love you, I have since the first time I saw you. I can never get you out of my mind, I love you,” he proclaims to me, grasping my hand and sort of kneeling before me. “I never should have done what I did. I am sorry; I promise you it won’t happen again. I love you Bekah, I really love you so, so, so much…” he says repeating a lot of what he has already said but I don’t care, something about his voice and his words make me forgive him in a heartbeat.
“I am sorry too. I was sad and hurt and I wanted someone else to feel that way too, so I lashed out at you because you were the first I saw and the easiest to blame,” I interrupt regret filling my voice, as my cold heart melts. I look lovingly into his eyes. “I never wanted to push you away, especially not the way I did.” He puts his warm hand on mine, and pulls it away from his cheek, interlacing our fingers.
“I don’t know how I could have gone on without you Bekah,” He says smiling goofily.
“You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, you know. You have always been here for me and listened to me,” I confess truthfully. He smiles even more radiantly and I smile back
“Does that mean we can get back together?” Colton asks, hope filling his voice and eyes. I laugh and smile recalling our conversation that night.
“I think we can, because I have always loved you” I say happily, kissing his nose. He pulls me close and kisses my forehead lightly.
“Good, because I really do love you too Bekah, no matter what happens, I will always love you,” he says, his words slightly muffled by my hair. I don’t care how muffled they are or what hinders them in that way, I just am glad that he said what he did. I squeeze him tightly and kiss him again, this time on his smooth and perfect lips.
 

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Sixteen
Colton and I walk together, taking our time and talking about everything we can possibly think about. I am relaxed but also waiting for him to bring up, we being a wolfani. He seems not even remember the topic, then appears to be ignoring it, but after walking and taking for an hour, he finally brings it up.
“So…” he begins awkwardly, as if he is unsure how to word what he wants to say. “What exactly happened that day at the village square?” He rubs his hand against the nape of his neck, eyebrows raised in question.
“Well, my dad and I had been fighting I got really mad. So I decided to make him prove who he loved more. While I was at it I figured I might as well tell everyone everything, so I did…” I explain openly. I nervously await his reaction. His face betrays nothing but after a moment, his eyes are inviting and I know he isn’t mad at me.
“Why didn’t you tell me before?” Colton asks, out of curiosity not anger.
“Because, I was confused and afraid, not of what you would say or think, but of what I was. I was afraid,” I admit softly to him, avoiding his gaze. He squeezes my hand with a strong, reassuring grip.
“So, how exactly does it work, being a wol… What is the proper… ummm… Word?” Colton asks tripping over his words. I laugh openly and begin to explain.
“I’m a wolfani. My mom was one too. That’s why I am one,” I say, my voice growing soft and emotional when I mention my mom. “I can shift by concentration on my wolfani essence and go back by concentration on my human essence.” He nods, comprehending and drinking in the information I have just supplied him with. I squeeze his hand like he did mine and we continue to walk through the outskirt of the forest. We talk about more things, but the topics aren’t of enough importance to mention. We kiss occasionally and our hands stay intertwined the entire time. I feel so happy and right, just walking there with him, the crisp early winter wind just beginning to drift through Chinook.
I breathe in the sharp, crisp air and sigh happily. I didn’t want to ever leave. When we get to the mountain, I decide that I should show him my secret cave. “Follow me, but you will have to run,” I say beginning to move more quickly. Soon we both are running and I lead him to the mountain’s base, where my cave is hidden. He looks confused but he still follows me. Laughing, I pull back moss and vines to reveal the hidden entrance that is otherwise invisible. I pull him inside and let him look around.
“Whoa…” he says lost for words as he gazes around. I laugh and let his had go so he can roam and explore more freely. I immediately go to my bow, arrows, and hunting supplies and fawn over them. I haven’t used them in such a long time and I can’t control myself. Tears pour out of my eyes, realizing that I haven’t hunted like this in at least one moon cycle if not more. I brush them away feeling childish, but set them out so I can take them with me before we leave.
“Do you want to see more?” I ask him temptingly. He nods excited and curious. I laugh to myself and then realize that I can’t swim with my dress on, only without it or as a wolf. I am hesitant to do either but I realize that shifting to my wolfani form would be more appropriate, but I wouldn’t be able to talk to him on the other side. I decide to ask him which he thinks I should do. He contemplates the idea and then answers me truthfully.
“I think, that it would be more appropriate for you to be the wolfani and when we get to where we get to where we are going you can change back and I will give you my tunic,” he reasons. I smile and kiss him. He is so smart!
“I love you Colton,” I say before saying something else that pops into my mind. “Wait, can you look away for a moment, I don’t want to ruin my dress so I will have to take it off,” he nods and me and turns away without arguing and I slip off my clothes and then shift. When I am finished, I nudge his hand with my muzzle and his gaze sweeps over me. I wait for him to indicate that he is ready to go and when he does I lead him to the pond. I jump in, eager to show, him everything. I make sure he follows me and I swim down through the tunnel. I emerge at the surface to get a drink of air and I wait for Colton to surface. When he does, he smiles at me and takes in his surroundings like he did last time then he takes his tunic off and turns around so I can shift back. I am soaked, but Colton’s tunic is warm, even though it its wet. I quickly pull it on and then walk up softly behind him and kiss his ear. He turns around and smiles at me. I smile back and take his hand in mine once again.
“Look at the ceiling,” I tell him pointing upwards. He follows where I point, and he gasps. I don’t laugh because this is exactly how I reacted. I still am at a loss for word every time I see them. I rest my empty hand on his arm and squeeze his hand again, pulling him back to reality. He looks back at me and resting his empty hand on my cheek, he kisses me on my lips and we kiss for a while. Then I hear footsteps and I pull ways, whirling around to face the intruder. It comes out of the shadows and I am unsure of what it is. I back up into Colton and feel safer. I hear a deep laugh as the stranger steps out of the shadows and realize that it isn’t a stranger. It is Cole. I am frozen by shock and anger and many other emotions, too many to put into words.
“Well, well, well... What are you guys doing here?” Cole asks harmlessly, smirking and smiling at the same time. I say nothing, but I feel Colton grasp my hand more tightly, as if by doing so, he can protect me and keep me away from Cole. Cole steps forward and gently touches his fingertips to my cheek. They are there only for a moment, like a gossamer of a dying wind. Then he kisses my cheek, where his fingers had been and I feel an icy tingling where his lips touched my skin. Colton drops my hand as if it was made of ice or fire and he steps in front of me.
“I could ask you the same thing, mutt,” Colton growls threatingly. “I know what you are. Don’t think I am unaware of what you have been doing with her either.” He says nodding to me. I am shocked and ashamed, but amazed that he knew all of that and still wanted me. He really does love me.
“Stop,” I say before I can stop myself. “Stop, I know you to don’t like each other, but that doesn’t mean you can fight. I like you both…” Cole smiles triumphantly and I continue, “But that does not make up for your behavior Cole. Colton at least had the decency to turn away while I changed, but you hid like a coward in the shadows, and watched me. For that you deserve to be punished.” His smile disappears immediately and the color drains from his face. Colton then smiles and I put a restraining hand on his bicep. He looks back at me pleadingly, wanting to hurt Cole to make up for the shame he cause me, but I am reluctant to let him. “I don’t know Colton… Does this really have to end in violence?” I ask. He flexes his biceps and nods a yes. I sigh reluctantly and release his arm. “I am not going to watch!” I announce to no one in particular. I turn away from them and then jump into the pond. With Colton’s tunic on, I can swim without having to shift to my wolfani form.
I swim through the water as fast as I can and my lungs burn. I propel myself faster, and soon I reach the surface. I change into my dry dress and wring out my hair. I then grab my hunting tools and run into the forest. Hunting is the only thing that can ease my mind right now and I haven’t hunted as a human in a long time. I run silently, stalking my prey cunningly, like I had when I was a human. I tune out my wolf senses and I hunt like I used to.
I catch a glimpse of a limping elk. I can tell he is old and injured, so I follow him. I almost can feel his pain and sorrow and I long to take him out of his misery, but I want to make sure I don’t cause him much pain in doing so, so I wait until I get the right opportunity.
Finally, the moment comes and I send an arrow through his heart. When he collapses I run to his side, and make sure he isn’t in pain. He died quickly and I am glad because he won’t have had to endure more pain. I pull my arrow from his chest and see that it will be usable again if I wash off the blood. I drag the elk towards the edge of the forest and I wait for Colton to return.
A few minutes later it isn’t Colton I see, but Justin. I call out to him and he jogs to my side.
“Whoa… What’s up?” Justin asks eyeing my attire curiously. I roll my eyes and then answer him.
“It’s complicated. This is Colton’s actually,” I tell him. It isn’t a lie, just not the whole truth.
“Where is Colton?” He asks looking around and not seeing anyone else but me. I chuckle.
“Oh Colton is just working out a problem with Cole…” I say as if it doesn’t pertain to me or bother me. Justin nods, thinking over the words I said.
“What did Cole do now?” Justin asks me, knowing it would be Cole’s fault. Colton hardly ever gets into fights, but Cole often provokes him to the point of using his fists to get his point across.
“Well, I was showing Colton something and Cole showed up and kissed me, and he blew his top at that.” I explain partially. Justin laughs and smiles knowingly.
“That’s Cole…” Justin says shaking his head. He sits down next to me and then grows quiet.
“What’s wrong?” I ask him. He sighs and after a few moments he answers me with a strained voice.
“It’s Elisha…” He admits to me. “She’s not at all who you to think she is.” I raise my eyebrows in question so he continues. “She has been hunting with Kelsey and Hannah a lot and she has been acting a lot meaner to everyone except them and you. It was Elisha’s idea to tell you about Kelsey and Colton and,” he says acknowledging my surprise, “she told me everything. She has been trying to drive you and Colton apart since I broke up with her and she has been spreading rumors and lies ever since. I am pretty sure almost everything she told you is a lie.” I swallow my surprise and let him continue. “Elisha is one of them now, and they are out to get you. Be careful.” Justin gets up and walks towards the village and his home.
“Wait, why did she tell you all of this,” I call out loudly to him as he walks away. He turns back towards me.
“Who knows?” He says smiling in a suspicious way. I want to ask him more, but he turns and jogs away, disappearing in the trees and brush of the woods.
 

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Seventeen
Colton doesn’t show, so I pull the elk all of the way back to the village. It is really dark out, but the town is filled with all of the villagers. I leave the elk and cautiously wander into the crowd. Many are dressed in their finest and feel out of place in Colton’s tunic. I push my way through the celebrating people. I see everyone I know but they seem to ignore me as if I weren’t there. I shake it off and continue to try to make my way through the crowd to the front. People push me around as they cheer and their eyes glow. I finally get more towards the front, but the people are more packed together and harder to get past. Many give me scowls and some give me a rude word too. I ignore them as many had ignored me and I finally break free from the crowd.
That is when I see them. Gina and Mick, they are standing together. Mick is in a tux and Gina is in an ugly grayish green dress. There is the preacher, Randy Greene, in his black ceremonial robes and I see the flash of silver. It hits me. They are getting married.
“I now pronounce you husband and wife,” Randy just finished saying to them. “Mick,” he says turning to him, “You may now kiss your bride.” Mick smiles and does just that. I can barely bare to watch so I turn away while the village cheers loudly. So he had made his choice, hadn’t he…? Now I will follow through with my choice. Mick and Gina are still kissing. Cursing his name, I turn away and head towards the houses of the villages. I head to my house and go through the front door for once. I look around and then go to my room. I grab a bunch of satchels and bags and such and start in my room, putting all of my belongings in them. Once my room is bare, I move to the hallways and take all of the stuff that is mine. The bags and satchels are almost full, but I continue to shove my things in there. I go through the rest of my house and then lastly, I go through my dad’s, I mean Mick’s, room. I don’t find much, just a few baubles here and there. I see a glimmer of metal or glass under the bed, and it tempts me. I go to see what it is and I am shocked at what it is.
It is a picture frame with broken glass inside. Behind the broken glass is a photograph of my mother. Photographs are very rare now and only are of those people who lived during or before the Sorrowful Times. I gasp and wonder how my mother got one of her. I don’t dwell on how she got it very long; I just look at her face. She looks younger than I remembered but she still looks beautiful like I remember. Then I wrap it in a scarf and put it in a satchel filled with clothing to pad and protect it. I stand up and after messing with a few of Gina and Mick’s things. I grab all of my packed things and I leave just as I see the crowd from Mick and Gina’s wedding dispersing. I stick to the shadows and move towards the only place besides the forest and my cove that I can go, Colton’s house.
 

[BookAuthor]

Chapter Eighteen
I set my stuff down outside the door and hesitate. I see the glow of fire lit lights and the shadows of Colton’s family members, but I am unsure if he is with them. Suddenly, I feel the coolness of a shadow wash over me and I feel the touch of cold, wet arms wrap around me. Frightened, I yelp and struggle against them. The arms let go of me and I turn around to face my assailant. He has backed up to lean against a nearby tree but he still taller than me, even as he is slouching. At first, shadows hide his face, but he steps forward once again and I can’t believe how stupid I was. Colton smiles at me and runs his hands up and down his arms as they hug his chest.
“Some welcoming committee you are,” he says shivering. Goosebumps cover his bare arms and chest because of the cold, night temperatures.
“Sorry,” I say guiltily, trying to look innocent and cute which isn’t that had to do, it being me and everything. He smiles and rolls his eyes at me.
“Sure you are. Now let’s get inside before I freeze to death out here in the cold of night,” Colton says trudging over to me and then opening the front door. I laugh at his overdramatic complaining and follow him inside. His house is always so much more inviting than mine. It seems to beckon me in and embrace me. I admire the paintings on the wall, made by Eliza, his mother who is an artist. I glance once more at their beauty before turning to his parents.
“Hello Bekah,” Colton’s dad, Ed says to me. I nod my head respectfully to him and then address both Ed and Eliza.
“Hello Mr. and Mrs. Drebes,” I begin formally. “As you probably know, my dad, I mean Mick, just married Gina. I have disowned him as I swore to and now I have no place to stay and…” Eliza doesn’t let me finish.
“We would love to have you stay here with us Bekah,” she says, reassuringly putting a hand on my arm. I smile and thank her warmly and then she continues. “You can stay in our guestroom.” Eliza points to the first door closest to the kitchen. I smile and embrace her, lost for the right words to thank her with. I then run and grab my bags and go to my new room. It is smaller than the one I used to have, but the walls aren’t gray, but alive with oranges, pinks and reds from Eliza’s paint. I set my stuff down and take in my new surroundings.
Sighing, I flop down on the cot and gaze at the ceiling. It too is painted, but it is black with stars to look like the night sky. I stand up and unpack a few of my things, including my quilt and the picture of my mom. I stare at her for a while and then hear a soft knock at my door.
“Come in,” I sigh after setting down the picture of my mom. Colton’s head pops in and then the rest of his body follows. He walks and sits down on the cot next to me.
“How are you doing?” He asks softly.
“I’m fine. How did the thing with Cole go?” I ask smoothing out his always messy hair. I feel a bump on his head and he winces when I touch it.
“Fine, but my hand still hurts,” he admits partially to me.
“What happened?” I ask, wanting more information.
“I broke his nose I think, and I hit my head in the tunnel swimming away before he could recover and strike back,” I smile at him and gently punch his arm.
“You are so mean,” I joke with him. He smiles at me and then messes up my hair. I shriek in protest but he stands up and then dashed away before I can do anything to him.