❛ the lazy writers ❜

[kolechia]

Which relationships do you like best; which strikes a chord in you? (romance, ordinary friendship, brother-sister, friendship borne of shared hardships/experiences, parent-child etc.)

I'm a sucker for writing both romance and friendship borne of shared hardships/experiences. This honestly sums up the relationship of my two main characters pretty well, even though I'm trying to step away from the romance side as I don't want to make it seem forced; I want it to seem logical and actually make sense.

Do you skim read? If so, do you ever try to write in a way that would still make sense for people who skim read?

If a piece of text contains language that is too complicated for me to understand or I simply find it boring and not engaging I will skim read. Other than that I don't. I don't think it is even possible to make a story make sense for people who skim read. Even if you managed to do that it would just be confusing and not flow well for the people who don't-

I'm been kind of dead from this thread I know- I've actually gotten back into writing my story again and I finally finished the first chapter! Well I've got it to a point where I think it's fine, a few things could be tweaked but I think it's alright. Sidenote writing grumpy characters are really fun! I find them oddly relatable.

Also I've not been keeping up with the thread but um howdy! welcome new peeps! Remember that eating your enemies (the carrots) makes you stronger! Stay safe!

[The Worst Username]

@Jerelyn
Note: I have a personal bias against any sort of dystopian work, so my plot-critique will probably reflect that.

I like the idea of soulmate-necklaces, but when it's combined with the whole "oppressive government" thing, it starts to sound a bit like the Matched series (Cassia is "Matched" to her ideal soulmate in her late teens, she falls in love with someone who isn't her Match, and she slowly finds out that the highly oligarchic government is in fact evil; some rebellion crud happens). Also, why do the Cupids want to matchmake? What happens after Chess finds out that her soulmate is Leo?

If you want to develop your plot outside of the YA-dystopia formula, then maybe you could change some elements about the plot and world that seem to appear in most dystopias. If you have the classic atheistic oligarchy, you could change it to a highly religious group that thinks it is following the will of God. If you have a futuristic dystopia, maybe you could have a modern or medieval dystopia. If your main character is a relatively privileged (for her world) White girl, you could have her be Black or Latina so long as you make the representation somewhat accurate.

Here's some common tropes in YA dystopia that, if tweaked, could make a much more interesting plot:

Characters
-rebellious, privileged, straight, cisgender, attractive, teenage White girl with special powers whose only real personality traits are "strong" and "stubborn"

-rebellious, privileged, straight, cisgender, attractive, teenage White love interest with special powers
-the protag's personality changes completely after she falls in love
-token gay/Black characters
-inexplicably absent parents

Plot

1. Protag lives in dystopia and believes that everything is perfect.
2. Protag, via the introduction of her love interest, discovers that the world is actually horrible.
3. Protag rebels and kills a bunch of people to take down the evil govt.

World

-confusing caste systems/apartheids that make no sense in context
-atheistic, Communist oligarchies; their leaders show up very late in the story
-huge cities with nonsensical infrastructure and lack of communication with any outside countries

It seems like you do have an original idea, though, so I wouldn't be too worried--I love the idea of Chess going to work in a prison. After all, you can always edit your outline and your characters! Good luck with your story, and have a great day!

@Sparrow and Minty

Welcome back from the dead! Glad to have you.

@Electric Zebra

Hello! Don't touch the carrots and stay away from Dr. Dumkopf--he's weirder than we are. Have you written anything in the past four years?

[Greenleaf]

Because characters are infinitely interesting, I'm curious:

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[b]Describe your OCs to us![/b]

Please don't feel obliged to, of course, but I'd be interested in hearing what kind of peeps you've created!

For me, I have several OCs I use multiple times - James, Aihua, and Xiuying. Williams, Aster, and Reggie also pop up occasionally.

James is the main character in my HERO universe's main story, and Aster is his co-protag. He (James) has the powers of invisibility and speed, while Aster has the powers of enhanced strength and flight. Williams drops in and out of the HERO universe depending on my muse, and is a veteran and sometimes-doctor, maybe a decade or so older than J&A, and has the powers of water-manipulation and healing. Reggie is kind of floating in cyberspace right now - he was originally created to take the role of Aster in HERO, but in the end his character kind of evolved apart and I couldn't figure out how to fit him in anymore. I kind of picture him in some weird sort of separate alternate universe where he runs a coffee/bookshop, lol.

Like Reggie, Aihua and Xiuying don't really have a story, though I do have histories and personalities mostly fleshed out for them. They're old characters left over from my Hetalia days, though I've reconfigured them to be more three-dimensional and their own people. They're siblings and get along quite well; Aihua is an economist/businessman and Xiuying is an accomplished musician and teaches music. Though I don't really use them in anything now, I have a lot of art I got for them from those aforementioned Hetalia days.

Diversity-wise, James, Aihua, and Xiuying are Chinese, Aster and Reggie are of mixed race and Williams is white, and they're all of the LGBTQ+ community. All of them except Xiuying are men, though, so I really need to broaden up on that front, not to mention think up stories for some of them because I want to use them in some way. I also have five more Warriors OCs, but I've already written a lot so I'll leave them for another day, lol.

[Jerelyn]

@sparrow;
The main purpose for this matchmaking system would be ultimate control. They are under the belief that bad behavior is a result of bad genes and therefore want to eliminate any threat to that order. I am still working out a few things in my head, because it does sound quite unorganized for a government system now that you mention it. I've come up with possible solutions to different questions, and you guys can tell me if they make sense or not.

Why do they want to decide who dates/marries/has children with who? Obviously this is the biggest and most important question. I'm drawing this out now. (For some reason, it helps? I'm a very visual person.)

What happened to Chess's new match's original match? They were imprisoned or died. (A decision I'll make after fixing up the plot)

How does Chess's new match's locket match hers? For some reason this took me a while to figure out. I literally had to take out a notebook and draw it out before I realized--duh. They don't even recieve their lockets until they are 18, and Leo was convicted of his crime before his 18th birthday. It would be fairly easy to give a child a new match before they ever recieved their locket. Adults above the age of 18 would be imprisoned and their partners would be given no replacement. Kind of a tough luck situation.

Why don't they just kill the prisoners? The government does not believe in execution or they do--and it's just not Leo's time yet. I believe the second option--an approaching execution date--might add another suspenseful obstacle for the characters, so I'm leaning towards it. I just don't want there to be too many things going on at once and overwhelm the reader.

Why not destroy the lockets? Especially since they still work? Or give the old lockets to new matches? This is an answer I'm still working out, but an extremely important one to prevent the entire plot from falling apart. I'll definitely come back here and fill this out when I think I've got a solution.


@The Worst Username
Ugh, I was thinking the same thing! I read the first Matched book in the series and I acknowledged the plot similarities, and I tried so hard to keep my distance... I am going for dystopia, but I don't like the idea of a reader taking one look and thinking, how cliche! I will consider alterations to avoid that. I'll test out a few ideas, stir it up a bit and come back with the results.

edit;; I forgot to mention that Chess is indeed of Asian descent, specifically Korean. Leonidas is caucasian, and I was considering making one of his parents latinx, but I am nervous about misrepresentation.

[Ranger of the North]

Do you skim read? If so, do you ever try to write in a way that would still make sense for people who skim read?
Occasionally (sometimes if it's not really interesting me), but I enjoy it more when I can take my time and just... soak it all in c;
Noo, I don't even know how that could be done XD

Oh my gosh.. I've found my people ~(＾◇^)/

Kia ora, welcome along! Watch out for carrots; they're ddeeaaddly

Mexi, I liked your piece! Poor Luna... Why was she handcuffed, though, when Danny did the attempt of murder... ing...? It sounds like a very unhealthy relationship OoO
Yeah, Idk if barely bearable is a thing tbh XD XD

It's not in the story, but it's a silent left out part.
The officers thought that the mother was the one who caused all of this, went insane and tried to kill her whole family. But Luna was handcuffed because the doctors didn't know unstable she would be when she woke up, and a good thing to, because she yelled for Danny and would have gotten up to go find him.
And yeah, I just left barely bearable there. xD

~snip~

Ah, I see! >^.^< I understand more after reading the whole thing on Wattpad, too XD
Hahaha XD


Ha Idek how to describe my characters lol.... actually I could prob'ly do Em but spoilerssss

[kolechia]

Describe your OCs to us!

AHHH my type of question! I think I'll only really talk about the ones in my story as I have too many.

this is rather long so sorry about that!

Victor is rather stubborn and old fashioned, impatient and prefers his own company. He is one of the Inspectors that works at the checkpoint, his job is the check the documents of people coming into the country. He is often in a foul mood is rather grumpy and is general bitter towards everyone. He is rather self-centered and only really cares about himself rather than the feelings of others because of this he can be very insensitive and struggle to understand when people are upset. Victor is constantly overworked and is often very tired. He also has permanent bags under his eyes and struggles to sleep. He is physically very weak, often neglecting his health and he is very pale and thin. He is rather poor and cannot afford to look after himself properly as well as he is very old school and will only "natural" medicines. Due to this, he gets sick a lot and very easily due to his weak immune system. He suffers from constant health issues such as his bad eyesight, bad joints and often has back problems due to hunching over constantly for years on end. He is very lonely and doesn't have many friends or family to keep him company. He is very bitter because of this and will often just be absorbed in self-pity. He is rather intelligent and enjoys reading in his spare time and will often use reading as a way to relax after a busy day. He rather cold and doesn't open up to people as he simply doesn't know how.

The main plot point is when Sergiu comes along and starts being nice he is left really confused. He hasn't had somebody be nice to him for no reason or a friend in basically 20 years. Even by the way the story is written, it sounds like he is gay but that isn't necessarily true. It's because he has been lonely for so long when someone is offering him company he doesn't know how to react or behave. He acts really rude and snappy towards them as that is how is used to responding to situations. It is kind of sad when you think about it- That being said, he has a massive soft spot for him but is too stubborn to admit it. He sees him as his only friend but as he is used to having years of loneliness he doesn't really know how to manage or handle a relationship. He often treats him rather poorly and doesn't understand why he is so patient with him.

Now onto a much more happier character-

Sergiu is rather short, especially for somebody his age. Very optimistic and childish which often clashes with Victor's serious attitude. He works as a border guard but has a TERRIBLE aim and is awful at his job (I don't know why he wasn't been fired, to be honest but oh well, he is trying.) Rather silly and doesn’t take thing as seriously as he should. Basically, a huge dork and has a massive soft spot for Victor. Even though everyone at the border finds it rather odd, he constantly checks on Victor and does everything in his power to make sure he is okay and doing well. Despite everyone’s cruel nature towards him he always tries his best to remain positive and stay happy. He is very gullible and too trusting, being rather easy to trick and manipulate he is often used as a human punching bag by many. VERY open about his feelings, energetic and expressive. He isn't very intelligent either and due to his lack of education he isn't very good at reading and struggles with it, even as a fully grown adult. Very naive. He doesn't really understand half of what Victor says but he still is well-mannered and listens to him talk. He finds it amusing as he is using such big and fancy words. He is that mum friend and is always somebody to talk to. It doesn't matter if you are rude towards him, he loves talking to people and making friends. He can come as rather annoying, needy or simply really chatty. He is very friendly and just gets along with pretty much anyone. He is rather feminine for a man and is often mistaken for a woman due to his girly appearance, causing men to flirt with him. He doesn't really mind but he doesn't understand flirty, he just thinks they are being really nice as he loves compliments. Due to this, he is often targeted by his peers and just deals with bullying, harassment and just getting slurs yelled at him.

He finds Victor to be a safe person. He just trusts him. Due to his mature nature, Sergiu knows he wouldn't act like the others due because of his intelligence. This provokes him to be very kind and friendly towards him, even if he is just being grumpy or rude

[winged-backpack]

Hi all! So, I mentioned a few posts back that I'd finally finished writing up a full plot summary for my book! I was just hoping that someone might have a read of it and see what they think? Good and bad, I'm open to any and all opinions

Shoot me a PM if you're open to having a read (and don't mind the ending being spoiled though, I can edit out the ending for those who don't want it spoiled ^^)

Thanks in advance!

EDIT:: just thought of an interesting question for you guys (I don't have any planned out OCs yet, which is why I haven't answered the last one ^^). I'm just thinking about it because I'm going to have to kill off a character in my novel, and despite not even having written it out yet, I'm already getting emotional about it (I'm going to try and make it as tragic as possible because I'm evil)
Anyways...

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[b]How difficult do you find it to kill off your characters?[/b]

[BucketORandomness]

Ah! Characters! Nuuuuhhh!
Well, I don't exactly know my characters unless I actually write out a character sheet for them ((Which I've only done for about three of my most recent ones. The rest morph personalities a lot...)) Each sheet is super long, so I don't think I can really answer that one. As for the killing characters off...

Well, so far I've tried avoiding actually killing characters off. There's a story I currently((?)) have on hold that found a dead body and will talk to their spirit at some later point, which might be going backwards, but oh well. In the same story, I also have plans to kill at least two other characters, and since I have planned that set of characters out minimally, I have a feeling it's going to be harder than originally planned...

SOS
I'm supposed to be updating a thing, but I've run into a problem. I have enough material written for the next part, but it doesn't follow the same format as the previous chapters. Up to this point, it's been kinda split in half between first person narrator and a third person POV character, so it kind of reads "A/B (A/B) A/B" and I'm trying to write something like "C/D" but C's POV has already taken up enough space for a whole chapter. Not really sure what to prioritize: length, or consistency >.<

[gravestones]

I have found my people. Jeezus hi, everyone. I'll post more / get more involved later. Whoo..

[sparrow;]

Describe your OCs to us!
I don't have many OCs I use a lot, and I have too many characters to tell you about all of them. I love reading about other peoples OCs though!

Jerelyn - Thanks! Good luck answering all those questions, I always find it difficult to come up with good dystopias...

How difficult do you find it to kill off your characters?
Um. Well. I find it... not that hard... I should avoid carrots, let's just say that.

Bucket - It depends on how important this is for you. If you're just writing it for fun, stick with what you've already got. If you want to create something to share with others, focus on quality. I would personally not re-write it, because I don't tend to share my stories that much and I write for personal enjoyment rather than to make something good. Your choice!

Kurojaki - Hello new person! Avoid carrots and have fun!