Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends

[Jessica :3]

So I saw my crush today. :3 we were outside and we were both playing football (though on different teams and not even playing against each other) and I would stop to look over at him and when I did I caught him looking at me too and he smiled. Then on my way out of social studies later in the day, he looked over at me and smiled again even though his friends were around him. Lol.

[ToastWhisperer]

My crush... <3.

He has a girlfriend though. And she happens to be one of my best friends. We were in the locker room for girls P.E., and my other friend said something about he liking him, and I said I liked him too. And the next day she asked me if I'd be mad if she went out with him. She is so sweet, and they are so cute together... <3... But I still like him. Like, ALOT. We text and we've talked on the phone before. We talk in school and stuff. <3........

[MusicalMoony]

Yesterday, my crush talked to me non-stop in english class. <3
I've seen him be kind of mean to other people, sometimes in a teasing way, sometimes not, but he's never like that towards me. He compliments me on how smart I am, but I always feel bad when we get tests or projects back with grades on them, since he always asks what I got, and I [usually] get an A/B+, and his grades are usually B-/C and sometimes even D's and lower. D:
He sits right next to me in english class, and he always turns so he's facing me, even if he's not talking to me. My best friend thinks he likes me [there are a few other signs that he might like me], but I'm not so sure.

This isn't in everyone's case, but something like that has happened to me and it ended HORRIBLY.
I had a massive crush on a guy in my class last year which lasted for half of the year. I was sensitive, though, so I'm pretty sure I overreacted. He was a 'popular' guy, smart, good at sports, and everything else which I usually admire. In class, he was in the top groups at Mathe and Writing and Spelling and English/Reading and everything else, and so was I. We got on pretty well and I never showed my feelings for him. He was at my tablegroup and I'd sit and laugh with his friends and make jokes, and I thought that even if he never liked me, we'd still be friends, which was nice. But I'd seen him bully others. We had another boy in our class who was an overall nice guy, but slow to catch onto things, and he was a bit of a people-pleaser, but who can blame him? Making others happy was his was of staying happy. But just because he was different, everyone except me and a few others shunned him, including those I thought were my friends. They knew it was wrong, but they still didn't want to be seen around him. Everyone teased him and called him names, and he was good at acting like it didn't hurt, even though you could lainly see it could. I began to double-check my heart, thinking, Do I REALLY want a guy like this in my life, if I even got a chance? He gave my friend his number and we would text in the afternoons, but they were never long intimate conversations. Then our groups changed and I was 'downgraded' in Mathe, so we'd do different work and I saw him less. After three weeks in which we'd had no conversations whatsoever except 'hi', we became friends on Facebook and when I saw he was online for the first time as me, I popped up and said 'hi'. The next thing I know, he's not replying to my texts or my messages or emails. I'd send him a message once evey few days, and soon I lost my patience and just asked him via phone, 'Y r u ignoring me? What did i do?' and he came back: "Can't you get it into your thick head that I hate you and I never want to speak to you again? You're so stupid, of course I'm ignoring you, I hate you' and I ran to the back of the field and spent the whole lunchtime with my friends (who'd followed me) crying.

[Darkest.Nation]

Seems like Ace, Cassius and Fortunato are all happily dating someone. Let me tell you all I can have a crush on ten guys at once. However, they aren't really head-over-heels crushes, more like "I want to be a friend" crushes.

So, some "major" crushes I haven't told you guys about. Razz and Sleek. Razz and I are both in drumline, he is even-tmepered like me and easygoing. He has amazing blue eyes and he's only a few inches taller than me.

Sleek is tall. He isn't in drumline, but is in two of my classes, and he seems to like me. He looks at me often, but we haven't talked. He is friends with my brother, my bestie, and a bunch of others, but me. Aye.

Tonight I had the perfect opportunity to say goodnight, but I didn't. I guess I freaked out. I really don't know what to do. I want to become his friend casually. If it doesn't work, then I won't interfere, but I think he'd be a good friend to have. Any tips?

Also, for you guys, what is a typical relationship like? Like, how hard is it to maintain it (your first ones especially), how to get over down-times, etc., etc. I've never been in a relationship before and I have no damn idea how to be a good girlfriend.

This is a huge concern because I'm not a people person, and I'm not really romantic, friendly, or have a general mood either. I'm moody, get very irritable/irritated at times, I spend a lot of time alone, and I think it would drive guys away.

[hotnoodle101]

Anybody care to diagnose my situation? I sit in front of this one boy in Spanish class. He is originally Vietnamese, and we shall call him Q. So maybe I am a xenophile, not the point. I don't have a crush on him, per se, but he is pretty cute in a geeky kind of way. He teases me (not in a mean way) alot. I tell him that he is rude, he calls me a crazy cat lady (I have four cats). We talk pretty much all class and (no matter how vehemently he denies this) I swear I heard him tell his friend that I'm pretty. What's you guy's opinion? Should I invest my affections, or is it not worth it?

[loonyloolaluna]

(thanks YTG for dragging me into this)

YTG... i guess what you just said... was partly my fault
sorry T.T

I remember in year 7 i liked this guy (i called him cheese - dont ask) and i liked him for... nearly a year... (some 'friends told him i liked him) we flirted, texted... but it was all a ruse... he as using me, i can tell now he was rofling at how desperate i must have sounded...
he was sporty, and looked hot... i was shallow... and young... and naive
he broke my heart by telling me (ill * out the vowels): 'F*ck off you b*tch! I hate you!'

then in year 8 i had another crush (i called him monkeys - again for the love of god dont ask) after 2 terms i told him that i liked him (man it was so hard to say that) he looked awkward, and embarressed... i asked him not to tell... but he did (even the teacher found out T.T) after him ignoring me so much (i actually dumbed my self down so i cold be in his maths group, and english group....) i just thought 'You fugger! you ignore me! after all ive- screw YOU!' (lol fugger - cant say thats swearing!)
again, he was tan, sporty... kinda smart, but dumber than me... but yet, i was still shallow and naive (it was only in january this year i started wanting to rip him to shreads everytime i saw him)

now i have a new crush (dear god) i nick named him UFO, 2 reasons, 1: his rank at ATC if Under Officer (which i hope you can guess is pretty high) so the initials are UO, and 2: my friend YTG always went UFO! and well, it made sense: unidentified (check), flying (check), object (... check?) so the name stuck
i mean... this guy is......... oh its more than a crush, its bloody (sorry if thats cussing) magic!
ive done so much... to know about him.... (next post ill say just how far ive gone)

[Darkest.Nation]

Phantom of the Opera person (sorry, band reference)- Tread carefully, keep your guard up. It's good you're friends with him, though.

[hotnoodle101]

XP I just looked wildly around for another Phan before realizing you were talking to me. Thanks for the advice!

[Darkest.Nation]

no problem. (:

[blackoutTaxonomist]

Tonight I had the perfect opportunity to say goodnight, but I didn't. I guess I freaked out. I really don't know what to do. I want to become his friend casually. If it doesn't work, then I won't interfere, but I think he'd be a good friend to have. Any tips?

Also, for you guys, what is a typical relationship like? Like, how hard is it to maintain it (your first ones especially), how to get over down-times, etc., etc. I've never been in a relationship before and I have no damn idea how to be a good girlfriend.

I enjoy your outlook on a lot of things--you keep a calm head, which I admire. That aside, I think you're heading in the right direction. Before you befriend a guy (or anyone, for that matter) it is good to analyze their qualities. If you think he's a good friend to have, then you're probably right about that. If you get nervous when you try to talk to him, that's totally fine and happens to the best of us, but you need to swallow your nerves and just do it. It may feel and sound stupid to you, but I can almost guarantee that you won't come across "negatively" from the viewpoint of someone else. It is all in your head, and the more negative thoughts that you have, the less likely you are to speak to this guy. If you want to say goodnight to him, then do it up--saying goodnight is just a common courtesy, isn't it? Even if you're trying to get his attention by saying this to him... It would be arrogant for him to assume it was because you "liked" him.

Relationships aren't hard if you have respect for each other. Establishing guidelines like no cheating, respecting privacy, space and "boundaries", etc. really help. Relationships are easiest when you are friends with the other person and can say or do anything around them without fear of being judged. Being a "good girlfriend" depends on your man, I suppose. You shouldn't focus so much on being a "good girlfriend" as you should focus on being yourself. Being you is being the best girlfriend you can be, right? I mean, we occasionally bend our rules a little for the men in our lives just to please them, which contributes to being a "good girlfriend". ((EDIT: actually, that last part sounds bad. I think what I meant was that we tend to do things we don't normally do for the man we like... i.e. watching a football/hockey game even if you can't stand it.))

Everyone has the potential to be moody and irritable... In fact, I am both of those things. You just have to force yourself sometimes to have patience with your partner and you will reap the benefits. You shouldn't be worrying about it. It will just come to you... And I really want to work in some kind of Bambi reference by saying "Twitterpated", but I'm just not sure how appropriate that would be :p

ffffffffff, I'm not sure I helped. You probably know all of the above... |D And I try so hard...