TheComfortCorner | V.8

[caesou]

...are her jokes "actually" offensive or is it just not my sense of humour
they hurt me every time for some reason, maybe it's to do with my want of being taken seriously and the jokes are related to me not being relevant
it'd exhaust the both of us if i told her every time i got hurt and i just wonder what to do about it

it's even led to me not being able to believe that she cares for me... ah.

[a small animal]

deleted

[Arlecchino ♡]

eating has become extremely difficult.

[mean&gay]

hmmmmm i have bio first thing tomorrow and i have to sit opposite the fella who simultaneously confessed his love to me and caused my mental health to plummet even further.

i have my friend as a buffer but she can only do so much and she doesn't knowwww. and i dont wanna ghost him but he legit more or less said "i like like you" after chem today and i FLED.

i am a coward in a man's shoes and this boy thinks im a WOMAN. i dont want to upset him but im also so mad at him for reminding me how deep i am in the closet that im tempted to get mean. hes so nice but honestly the thought of dating anyone at the moment gives me The Big Afraid.

im a coward AND a baby. a big dumb gay baby. and he thinks im cishet. at least he knows im a coward. thats just about all he knows about me.

im not ashamed of being a coward. thats the sole reason im still living lmao. im ashamed because im makin this all about myself.

hes doing the hard bit but i just dont care. i just wanna play poker with my BROS and hes ruined that by LIKING ME. how dare he see me as more than a no homo bro. i suppose the no homo is the problem because of my CURRENT SOCIAL PERSONA i.e FEMALE PERSON.

maybe ill just come out to him.

nope. i hate him for making me think and feel and i am not guilty in the slightest. maybe a little. barely.

my best friend is good at consoling me. i dont need romance, ive got cool friends. this guy was my cool friend until his brain made the love chemical for my big dumb face.

my brain doesnt make the love chemical, just the angry sad pretentious chemical.

im seeing my own bowels right now.

[cece.]

i can’t do this anymore.
i
am
DONE

SHE WILL FOREVER BE THE REASON WHY I WILL NEVER HAVE CHILDREN BECAUSE I DONT WANT MY CHILDREN TO TURN OUT LIKE HER
“but (cece) she’s a child”

DAMN RIGHT SHE’S A CHILD BUT SHE’S ALSO GETTING TO THE AGE WHERE SHE SHOULD KNOW NOT TO ACT LIKE THIS
BUT SINCE Y’ALL DONT WANT TO PARENT HER, I HAVE HAVE TO PARENT MY OWN SISTER BECAUSE YOU CANT FREAKING DO IT AND THEN Y’ALL GET MAD AT ME FOR DOING IT
THEN RAISE HER BECAUSE I SHOULDNT HAVE HAD THAT RESPONSIBILITY OF RAISING HER THAT YOUNG BUT SINCE Y’ALL APPARENTLY WANT HER TO BE A HEATHEN AND A LITTLE DISRESPECTFUL BRAT THEN BY ALL MEANS

i cannot WAIT for the day she becomes worse than you think i am now and i will laugh in your damn faces.

[vicasterology]

this is literally so dumb but my writing class is seeing a play tomorrow for a field trip and he said to dress nice, and all my clothes are either completely relaxed or completely fancy, so i pretty much have no choice but to wear a dress and these heels i wore to homecoming, which i like but i'm really scared because we're coming back to school in the middle of seventh period, meaning i'm going to have to walk into math and chorus dressed the way i am which scares me because so many people love to talk about "girls who try too hard for school" and literally????? it doesn't affect you at all, mind your own business. so many people talk either behind my back or to my face about how they think i wear too much makeup already, and wearing a dress and heels to school along with a full face of makeup is really not the move with the people i know

my math teacher treats me like an idiot and i feel like part of it is because i put a lot of time into my looks, which for some can read as ditzy or slacking but literally that isn't the case i just love makeup and i want to do it as a career someday that's literally it ugh

people in chorus already look at me and laugh for literally no reason anyway so i'm..... really excited for tomorrow

did this go how i thought it would? nope, it went worse!

within the 5 minutes that it took me to walk to class, 5 people talked about me behind my back (there were probably more but i just didn't hear them) and i tripped on a puddle and everyone laughed at me
i cried the second i got in the classroom, and i had to be picked up when the field trip was over instead of going to class.
i asked my writing teacher if i could stay in his classroom until the bell rang so i wouldn't have to be in the hall with these people and said it didn't matter because i was leaving anyway and he said yes but he said "don't you think you're being too sensitive? that's not really a good reason to leave early" and he wouldn't let me explain myself and i started crying and my stepsister's friend had to take me out into the hall and calm me down for like 10 minutes

so yeah i never want to go to school or see that teacher again!

[Leon Kennedy]

I just had surgery, i hated it.. every one told me it only last 10 minuets and it’s done, It felt longer, it was painful and I never want to do that again..ever. Now I wish someone could comfort me and cheer me up while I lay in bed feeling moody and sore.

[guh-huh!]

i really have a complicated sense of self-worth.
like one minute, i'm king of the world. everybody loves me, and i love everybody.
then, my brain just decides to rear it's ugly head every so once in a while and hits
me with that sweet, sweet depression. and it's never just "okay", either. i'm only
extremely happy and positive, or i'm crying and wallowing in self pity.
it's life's saddest see-saw. and i'm buckled in tight, friends.

[arovet li]

I always feel the same and I hate it, I hate that I've never bothered to do anything about it, and I hate that every day I wake up thinking it'll be different and I'll succeed and feel decent when I fall asleep, yet I fail every day and I become more miserable every day and there's an endless list in my mind of things that I wish I could be, it keeps getting longer and longer and the only thing that comforts me is plastering stickers all over my bed so I can be reminded of the only time in my life when I was truly happy and pure, I never know what to do and if my life goes on like this for any longer I'll go mad

[Swishy & Broken]

So many things have been going on with my life -
Then there's my boyfriend and he just makes me so sad whenever he's mentioned

He was over maybe 3 or 4 sundays ago and told me he didn't have wifi- ok cool I understand that it's fine. Then he goes over to his friends house with wifi and ignores my messages (like reads them and doesnt reply). BUT STILL REPLYS IN HIS GROUP CHAT WITH HIS FRIENDS. AND LIKED TWEETS AND FACEBOOK POSTS. And I'm out here trying to desperately get his attention somehow sending him things he likes so he'll at least respond. It's been a long while and he still refuses to answer me, so I'm just.. gonna assume I'm single now? Idk I just can't play this "my wifi is out" game while hes obviously online with his friends and on twitter and stuff.

Relationships are such a waste of time I just wanna cry for 300 years and hide in my room but I have all this other stuff happening too and- it's just.. too much.