Write a Letter You Cannot Send (Read the Rules!)

[Fwutter]

Dear E.
I know sometimes when i am having those days where my depression is winning
significantly I don't show it, but I am so thankful for you. I lost a lot and at one
point in my life all i did was sit in the dark and stared at the ceiling with
literally nobody to text. I was at rock bottom of loneliness. When you texted me
i forced myself to keep the convo up, i told myself this is a friend opportunity,
no more being alone and battling your mental illness alone, and i did it and now
im honoring you the title of Best Friend. The hardest title to ever gain from me
because of past events. Thank you so so much for sticking with me especially
when i'm at a low point. Thank you for apologizing if I come to you about something
that bothers me instead of turning the problem to me, thank you so so much for not
treating me like everyone behind me did.

Dear Mewtini,
I need to appreciate you more. I don't know how lucky I am until you're gone. When
i deleted my discord and deleted literally all contact I had with you I was at my serious
lowest. Thank god I saved your discord name and tag in my journal and i added you back.
I am so glad you doing better now, I am really really sorry for all the stuff I put your
through because you thought I wasn't with you anymore. But i am here and so greatful.
You are like a brother to me and i say that from the heart. Thank you so much for
listening to me vent and being there and I really just love you with all my heart
i sincerely do love you so much you where there when literally nobody else was
thank you so so much.

[oat milk]

dear my mom and also my dad,
you are annoying

dear m/u/i dont know what your name is now,
you are also annoying and im really mad at you for ditching the garden concert a year ago because i really wanted to go

dear elliot,
i miss you lots

dear me myself and i,
shut up. you are stupid

[Raptorfang]

I figured recently that my old posts on this thread have a lot of old emotional baggage I wanna detach myself from, so I'm going through and getting rid of them to help move forward. This is sort of cathartic I guess. Ok peace out.

[Winstalgia]

Dear ____,

how are you?

[hellish]

dear f,
i wonder if you ever think about me. it’s been a year since we last talked, but i still can’t shake you off my mind. you always find your way to my thoughts. i keep finding small pieces of you in everything. i will never be able to talk to you again and it pains me, but all i want is for you to be okay. i guess that’s the worst thing about all of this, not knowing. i’m sorry that i was never enough. sometimes i wish i could go back in time and be a better person for you. for the both of us, i guess

fun fact: it’s been six years and six months since we met. i’m not lying when i say that i thought of you every single day. is this what a capricorn love is like? i think a small part of me will always love you

[lol]

dear j,
it's been a couple of months now that we haven't spoken... that i've left you and i wonder how you're doing. you manage to wiggle into my thoughts every now and again and i always feel so guilty when you do happen to waft upon my mind. how is your life now? i don't like thinking about what we had or how it ended, i don't like how you still tried chasing after me, and i certainly didn't like how you went after my friends either. and yet, here i am, several months later, wondering how you're doing. it's definitely a taboo question, don't get me wrong- but i think about you from time to time. little things, songs, moments remind me of you and i wish that they didn't. you're like gum that's stuck to the bottom of my shoe, and you're impossibly hard to clean off. but, i'm hoping, by the end of the summer— i won't be thinking about you anymore. i'm going to try assiduously to wipe you clear from my mind and dance a new dance... that doesn't include you.

from yours truly,
madison

[artemis,]

dear myself,
stop getting attached and realize that people grow bored
of you.

[Raptorfang]

I figured recently that my old posts on this thread have a lot of old emotional baggage I wanna detach myself from, so I'm going through and getting rid of them to help move forward. This is sort of cathartic I guess. Ok peace out.

[0009]

Hello. You know very well who you are.
You won't even read this, and I can't really seem to mind it. This is simply a form of self-indulgence, and I will accept it for what it is. A mere whisper into the glistening, uncaring void.

I don't know if I'm hiding or repressing any emotion from myself. Knowing myself, there's probably a lot that I've yet to ponder over and fully understand. I don't know why I feel like this towards you. Rationalizing it only leads to unnecessary confusion. I can't help but have a nagging intuition that tells me that this is linked to something bigger that I've glossed over-- a piece of self reflection that hasn't hit me yet. Progress has always been a matter that has left to be vague and undetermined, since I've never been a person who liked handling or was good at absorbing the scope of the responsibility that is yet to be given or has been thrusted upon me.

How would any of this relate to you?
Well, it doesn't.

You have grown fond of her. These type of things happen. It was only going to. This is a petty situation that can be easily overlooked. When studied and compared, patterns emerge. These type of patterns are painful to look through, if you haven't fully accepted the person you are. I haven't, and neither have you. I don't think you really care. And that's for the best.

That is for the best.

[the folly of man]

uhh.. hi
me again

it's been a long time since what happened, and I don't think I look up to you anymore,,
I don't know what you did, but if it's so bad my friend won't tell me, or so bad you got IP banned, it's probably really bad.
still, I wish I had gotten to talk to you at some point. you were pretty much my idol and I loved your work more than anything in the whole world. I was excited beyond reason any time I saw a new game being made, even though they literally always got abandoned.
well, the games that did get finished, the best games I've ever played, are now broken due to an update. and now they can't be fixed because you're banned. it breaks my heart and sometimes makes me unreasonably upset, because those were just?? my most favorite things in the whole world???
I even went as one of the characters from the games for halloween, hah.

the good news, though: you've still been a great inspiration to me. I hope to make my own games now. I have a big story planned out that my brother helped with. I have characters that I adore.

I wish you hadn't gotten banned
then I'd have been able to actually tell you this at one point
even though it would probably be in a few years
but it'd still be someday

yeah, that's all
sorry. I sound like a dork.