by Loxo » Mon Oct 29, 2018 6:20 pm
Dear, D,
You know how some people say that time heals all wounds?
Well, they're lying.
Grief never heals. It never goes away, never subsides, never diminishes or 'gets better', as everyone keeps telling me it will. I'm never going to stop thinking about you. I can't. You're in my head, I think about you wherever I go. I see you every day in complete strangers. Sometimes, I think I can still hear you, but you're gone.
Even anger will heal. I thought that the raw, irritated wounds of fury that I had nursed and allowed to fester for years would never leave me, but I've let them go. I'm happier now, even if it is just marginally so.
But my grief will never got away. It's in my head, I think about it wherever I go. I feel it when I meet complete strangers. It deludes me into thinking you're still here, but you're gone. And nothing that I do will ever change that.
My family is to the point where they can casually bring you up. They just throw your name into a conversation, and I have to clamp a lid on my emotions before I melt down.
From,
The one who will always miss you.
Hi, I’m Loxo, formerly Bageera. I love cats, rabbits, and writing.
I am an author and love to write. I prefer xenofiction (books from an animal or non-human perspective) and fantasy!
I work at an aquarium, so if I mention doing odd things (holding tarantulas, getting attacked by feral chickens, helping kids to feed sharks, cleaning up tortoise turds, chasing escaped ducks, etc.) then they probably happened at my job!
The book I’m reading today: The Return of the King (Book 3 in the Lord of the Rings trilogy)
Animal of the day: Jumping mouse
Extinct creature of the day: Quetzalcoatlus
My favorite colors: Emerald green and electric blue
I currently hoard rabbits of all kinds, spiders, tabby cats, and calico cats.
Feel free to PM or trade with me. I love to interact with other CS users!