TheComfortCorner | v.6

[agent 48]

'I have to impress them.' That's my only thought nowadays. I have to impress my cousin or else I will always be seen as the bratty little cousin who is a literal joke in class.
I have to impress my relatives so that they don't hate me. I have to impress my classmates for so many reasons, mainly because I'm sick and tired of being seen as the annoying, ugly fat girl. I hate it, I hate my cousin, I'm always inferior to her. She doesn't like me and everybody loves her. I'm looked down upon all the time by my parents and by my classmates. If I don't impress them then I'm always going to be like that.
What makes it worse is that I'm becoming more like my older cousin with my younger cousin- I'm in the middle of the two, both are distant cousins and they don't really know each other. I don't want to be like my older cousin, my younger one doesn't deserve that. She's so happy and energetic and optimistic: I don't deserve her. I seem like I'm always distracted when she's talking to me but I can't focus. She talks for so long and she's so energetic, always seeking me out to hang out with me and announcing herself as my younger cousin because she's proud of that. I love her, I really do, but I don't deserve such a wonderful cousin at all.
I have a Christmas party this week with the entire family. I got my cousin a gift but I know she won't be impressed- airs too small. I can't get her anything bigger and I'm embarrassed of my abilities. I can't do anything for them and I'm most likely always going to be viewed as a brat in the eyes of my classmates because she's in my class. What would that mean?
In class she's:
Popular
The teacher's favourite
Smart
Pretty
Social
A role model

She makes it clear to my friends and I saying that: "Just because you're my cousin or you're friends with my cousin doesn't mean I like you. If anything, I like you less."
She makes it clear she doesn't like me. She told me I was a failure. She glares at my friends and I as if we're idiots.
I'm nowhere near her level. I'm the complete opposite of her. I love to sing, she can sing it better. I like to draw, she can draw better. I like to write, she can write better.
What makes it worse is that my friend is constantly picked on in class. It's so obvious it's painful- Our teacher dislikes her. They sing stupid songs about how nobody likes her and it eventually spread everywhere. I can't stop it either, that would make it worse. I just hate my class- Heck, I wish I never went to school. I just can't do it anymore. I don't want to have to impress everybody to get them to at least respect me a little!

I hate all this, dangit.

[nana]

i dont think anybody without depression can really understand it.
the horrible... pain it gives you.
i cant exactly type it. because the pain is so strong its bigger than words.
ive realized im not going to be happy for a very very very long time.
and honestly
my body and soul cant handle that.
today.
tomorrow.
christmas.
im honestly expecting to break. to... fall off the edge.
because as i sit here crying i realize im hopeless.
im ugly.
im stupid.
im talentless.
im... a horrible freaking person.
and im so tired of life throwing crap at me.
this is to my future funeral.
i really hope that you all are happy.
that everybody is happy and laughing.
because im gonna be in the pits of hell where i belong.
im dying right now.
and i cant live anylonger.
my heart cant take it.

[Dill]

So I got invited to my first coworker holiday party tomorrow night. I'd be elated... but my mom won't let me go.

Now keep in mind I'm a legal adult, so I should have more freedom to go out and do stuff like this. I've been away at college too, so going out to a party is no new thing for me - something she knows as well. The main thing that's stopping her from letting me go is the fact that I'll have to drive myself to and from the party, and that she doesn't trust other people on the road. Even though I've driven myself home at 1AM from a concert that was a half hour drive from home.

It's just killing me inside a bit, knowing that my parents still have a grip on the chains they've attached to my life. That and the fact that when I decline tomorrow, even though I'll use a stupid excuse, I'll still think inside: "Yeah sorry, I can't go because my mom said no." Like I'm still some fourteen year old getting permission to go to the mall or something. It just sucks.

I get that. I'm on break from college and back with my parents for a few weeks, and the stark contrast of how much freedom I have when I'm away at college versus being home is shocking. It's like the parents don't understand you have been surviving just fine completely on your own for a while. I wish I had the perfect solution for balancing out your choices and your parent's control, but the best thing I can offer is to sit with your mom and talk about the issue. If you convey how you are feeling or remind your mom what it was like when she was your age, she might be more inclined to give you more freedom. Hope this helps.



I have my own rant actually. One of my best friends is this guy that I'm trying to convince myself I don't like officially started dating this girl that he has been pining after for years. I'm happy and excited for him because this has been a source of emotional turmoil for a long time, and I'm happy that he is finally happy. However, I can't help but be jealous of this girl because, well, this guy is really great. I was talking with one of my girlfriends about who she could see me dating and she listed off a bunch of characteristics, and he checked every single one off the list. But he's the person that everyone falls in love with; he has hordes of girls that pine after him. But still people ask me if I would date him, or people even ask if we are dating and I can't help but imagine what it would be like to actually be dating him, and that kills me because I have no right to like him. We don't go tot he same school but I find myself counting down the days till I get to see him again and as soon as he leaves it's like I need to see him again. I find myself thinking that maybe in a few months or even years maybe we could be together. But I can't do this anymore. I need to be his friend that is there for him through thick and thin but I find myself clouded by emotion. I need to move on, find my own perfect person. I don't know what to do though. People say I should cut myself off from him, but he's my only best friend that lives relatively near me and I need him in my life. I honestly don't know what to do because I can't live with being this close to him but I can't live without him. God this sounds so pathetic, someone just help me so I don't have to be this person.

[Rune.]

I lend you money to buy art when I'm already struggling to feed myself and you decide to run off with my money? so much for being "friends"

[La Volpe]

ugh I'm really annoyed, there is this cat that is around my area I don't know if it's a stray? But it is attacked my older cat since he can't defend himself that well, the cat has already bitt this old lady's ankle that lives down my road! I have no idea what to do! Every time I try to get it out my garden it will just sit there and hiss at me? Ugh I just hate seeing my poor kitty come back with cuts and scratches....

[.zombie]

some advice would be greatly appreciated.

i really want to get into a good college, and so far it isnt going well. I had all As and crap except one C last quarter, and im trying to get my grades up for this quarter as well. What freaks me out is that I have midterms. And I swear, I am going to fail the heck out of those tests.

Ever since about two years ago, when I was in middle school, my grades started plummeting. The problem? It was probably a mix of not knowing what was being taught and just going through puberty i guess.
I thought it was going to be a small phase, but it wasnt. And I hate myself for it. I was at the top of my class, now im somewhere in the middle of failing and getting a high grade. I just dont understand how other students are so smart. They juggle sports, school and social life in one sitting. I dont know what the heck is wrong with me. Yeah, I do admit to procrastinating, which is proabnbly why my grades started floppin around when they did, but my smarts,, are just gone??
to those who are at the top of their class- could you help a fellow classmate out? What is your secret? How do i not fail my midterms????

[Thalassic]

I hate christmas

---

Does anyone have any idea about antibiotic doses
I got some for my cough/flu/whatever thing, and no one told me how I'm supposed to take them and I'm freaking out and the doctor has gone on vacation now and just
damn what do I do

[cainhurst]

Does anyone have any idea about antibiotic doses
I got some for my cough/flu/whatever thing, and no one told me how I'm supposed to take them and I'm freaking out and the doctor has gone on vacation now and just
damn what do I do

that usually depends on the brand and how strong the pills are
the antibiotics i was prescribed a few times all had a "one in the morning, one in the evening",
or "one in the morning, one around midday, and one in the evening" plan

actually, how you're supposed to take them should be stated in the package insert, have you checked that yet?

[Thalassic]

Does anyone have any idea about antibiotic doses
I got some for my cough/flu/whatever thing, and no one told me how I'm supposed to take them and I'm freaking out and the doctor has gone on vacation now and just
damn what do I do

that usually depends on the brand and how strong the pills are
the antibiotics i was prescribed a few times all had a "one in the morning, one in the evening",
or "one in the morning, one around midday, and one in the evening" plan

actually, how you're supposed to take them should be stated in the package insert, have you checked that yet?

I didnt need a whole box so they just gave me 2 plates without the box, 20 capsules total and its moxilen 500mg
so I dont have the instruction page ;;

[.zombie]

some advice would be greatly appreciated.

i really want to get into a good college, and so far it isnt going well. I had all As and crap except one C last quarter, and im trying to get my grades up for this quarter as well. What freaks me out is that I have midterms. And I swear, I am going to fail the heck out of those tests.

Ever since about two years ago, when I was in middle school, my grades started plummeting. The problem? It was probably a mix of not knowing what was being taught and just going through puberty i guess.
I thought it was going to be a small phase, but it wasnt. And I hate myself for it. I was at the top of my class, now im somewhere in the middle of failing and getting a high grade. I just dont understand how other students are so smart. They juggle sports, school and social life in one sitting. I dont know what the heck is wrong with me. Yeah, I do admit to procrastinating, which is proabnbly why my grades started floppin around when they did, but my smarts,, are just gone??
to those who are at the top of their class- could you help a fellow classmate out? What is your secret? How do i not fail my midterms????