What's your current mood [V.3]

[hiraeth + hound]

ugh

dont you dare cry
dont you do it

i've had a really amazing day and i have all these weird butterflies like
im actually important to someone for once
i really feel, that im important and i have a purpose to one single person for one frecking single time in my entire life

but im just being pathetic over this and acting like some dumb lovestruck twelve year old boy.
i feel so dumb and it's not cute and
ugh i hate myself

[Caelus]

i get the feeling that i need to go to the mental ward right now. im completely unstable. its been over a year and a half. its been that long since i was last like this. one person was the reason i was able to snap out of it.
but hes gone now. i dont trust anyone else. all my friendships are built on falsehoods.
i want to cry and plead and tell someone, anyone, the extent of this. but i cant ever bring myself to.
is it worse this time? i dont know. it feels like it. it feels different.
but at the same time, im completely numb to it. it feels like theres a crushing weight on my chest and a gaping emptiness in my stomach.
is my new coping method shutting down and becoming an emotionless robot?
sometimes i feel like i deserve to suffer, anyway.

man, what would my real life friends think of me if they saw these posts?

[deertush]

I'm so happy!!!!!! :000
Hes all okay!! I was worried like heck over him!! tbh I started thinking he'd been attacked by the mean dogs @ his place or hurt himself even worse than he actually did and it really started affecting me oops,,, but aaa i think I've found the one for me. It took a long while of sifting through issues but he's the best friend I've been wanting and I kinda hope it stays that way forever.

Also I've always said I'll never cosplay anything because I can't find the right character but this diRTY GAY robot seems to be the on e for me,,, I may a lil too chub and short for his perfect self but he Y who cares. NOT ME.

last thing,,, uh,,, youre probs reading this,,,, bc,,, im narcissistic and thats what ruined everything 8) but uh,,, hey just message me on skype or call or... do something... ,,, youre not the only the only one whos feeling it,,, i just need confirmation bc i just dont believe anyone would even want to look @ me with how jerky i was,,, i loved the late night talks and youR FREAKING WIFI MESSING UP OUR EPISODES SO WE'D HAVE TO CONSTANTLY SAY WHAT MINUTE WE'RE AT,,and then there was that earthquake thing that i'm still worried over for some reason,,,, but,,, i miss it all too,,, a lot,,, and if youre actually not worried abt me @ all and was vagueposting about someone else then ignore this because i am a selfish bean who just wants everything to himself 8) thinking abotu names since i should have a more masculine name, does ludovic or jack sound nicer?

[0000007]

it feels like I got no sleep last night and my dreams need to stop being so vivid because I'm really done dreaming about thiS pErson that I don't even care about or know
it feels like I was up half the night- and I honestly think I might have been and its making me pissed off that I probably woke up at one point and stared at the wall
I could rant all day rn I just hate this morning and myself today goodbye

[deftonesly]

Anxious and scared and nervous.

[crypticscreams]

Sick and tired

[нana ѕong]

Gods i feel horrible... Im not running a fever (99.2) but still... Can i not go to work today...? Or right.... I have to go because the managers are complete donkeys!

[hypnowave]

scared mostly
of people... who can never seem to accept who i am

[corviidae]

missed the bus
questioning my decisions in life
sorry not sorry

[Katria]

Bleh I'm about to possibly make 500k on FR if this person would log into eldemore and accept the deal. I really need the treasure. I'm leaving for my friends house soon so idk when i'll next be online and I don't want to leave them with the open trade so they worry... o.e