This is going to sound waaay childish, but I really have to get this out. Pretty pointless, but I have no one to go to right now. I seriously don't know what to feel or think right now. He's always yelling at me, Trying to pick a fight with me, and trying to irritate me 'till I snap and get back at him. Sounds like normal sibling sort of thing, but when I ask him a question out of concern when he's not feeling well, just a simple "You feeling okay?" "Do you need anything?" but he just has to make a big deal out of it, like I'm being paranoid, or I'm over reacting. Then he has to go and tell our parents a complete lie, and say that I'm 'interrogating' him, and being too paranoid. He just started recovering from being pretty sick, and now I finally have the chance to talk to him, and he instead tries to fight with me, telling me I'm annoying or I just need to 'shut up' because I'm irritating him. I would respect him politely asking me to stop if he still weren't feeling well, but that is not the case. He's perked up and is obviously fine, and when I'm talking to someone else, he HAS to chime in and say something bad about me, or tell me to shut my mouth. He lies in front of our parents about me, he blames every little thing on me, he orders me around like I'm his personal maid, and I'm supposed to go fetch him something at his request, and he's just overall what you would call, a bully. He has his moments where he is in a good mood, and you can actually keep a nice conversation with him, but say something or ask a question that he doesn't like, he snaps at you, blames you, and then lies about it. It's frustrating, it's confusing, and it just makes me feel like I'm the bad person. I know I shouldn't let it get to me, but when our parents actually BELIEVE him, and then yell at me for it, there's nothing to do but just isolate myself from everyone or listen to music. He complains about that too. Like I always have my earphones jammed in my ears and I never listen to him. I think he should know why. I just don't know what to do anymore. He's nice to everyone else, but me. I think I need to go listen to angst-y music and draw some vent art.... *sigh*












































