Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V4

[d.va]

i am so heartbroken.. i made the mistake in my relationship so its all my fault... but i love this guy so much. i need tpo get over him. i thought i was but i guess not.. what thhe heck do i do... :'( </3

Here's what you do:
1. Go cry your heart out. It helps, I swear.
2. Release any other emotions you felt when with him: anger, confusion, frustration.
3. Surround yourself with your friends and family. They will help you feel a lot better.
4. Break your connections with him. Delete him as a contact on your phone or unfriend him on social media sites.
You would be surprised how quickly you can get over a guy even when you thought it was true love. There are some great links on the front page of this topic, too, solely for this purpose. I suggest looking at them, they helped me get over my first break up. c:
Good luck to you, I hope you feel better soon.

[ExplodingInk]

My boyfriend and I are a long distance couple --
but we have been together for an entire year (on the 26th)

I love him -- and we talk about marriage, kids, etc. So far as wedding rings
I know it is early; I mean I'm a year from 18 and he is going to be 20; but I
can't think of anyone else I would rather spend my whole life with.

However I am worried... he's not a virgin like I am;
and I know he is going to want to do things with me
but the thing is I'm so insecure and am slowly getting
used to my real life friends hugging me. I don't feel ready
and I told him; he told me he wouldn't pressure me but
he would be disappointed... which makes me feel guilty
like I have to; or he won't be happy..

How should I tell him that I feel like I have too?

Ok so my bff was talking to my crush (her ex) and was gonna ask him out for me but she said that she couldn't do it. Now it's all up to me over asking him out or not. I can't do it either though, I'm way too scared and nervous, plus I dunno how to say it and word it. It's kinda confusing now because obviously she's not fully over the breakup. She's like a sister to me and I would never hurt her like that by asking him out but I really like him also. Ugh, this is really hard and confusing. I don't want to like him if she can't take it but I can't just suddenly stop my feelings for him. She wants to make a truce saying that we both just stay friends with him but I dunno if I can do that. Omg relationships are hard and I hate them now kinda. Well, there goes yet another stupid crush.. She says I can still like him just not date. Yeah, how will that kinda work out? I'm just not in a very happy mood right now...

...Yes she is your best friend; and you are right you cannot just stop your feelings for him. If this was me; I would survey how much I knew personally about this guy, how much we hung out, how much we got along. Sometimes I feel like our friends love someone or did love someone and the light they put them in when talking about them -- makes you want that too. So when they break up you're stuck with mixed feelings about the guy because what she had told you prior made you want him; now he is single.
...The best things to do in this situation in my opinion is distance yourself from him if you aren't close or don't talk. Just try not to think about it but keep this in mind; What happens, happens. If you and the guy are close and you like him for who he is and not what your friend told you then don't shove him away. If you did end up dating him and your best friend is like your sister she would understand and back off as long as you are happy.
...Also, it's never a good idea to ask someone to ask out your crush if it is there ex. It can hurt them if they aren't completely over that person. Apologizing to your friend and hugging her to tell her that you're sorry you put her through that may or may not be neccessary. Personally, I would do that but that is because I always try to please others due to my pyschology background and think of things in a non-bias(I don't take sides) way.

...The main thing to just keep in mind is like I said; What happens, happens and your friend if she is a true friend will support you through anything. Likewise however try not to talk about how great he is in front of her or things of that nature. That can hurt her heart about their break up and cause tension between you two. I wish you the best of luck and if you need any help feel free to PM me any time. My inbox is always open to anyone <3

[Saule]

/Sigh.
Flirtationships are the worst thing in the world...
I'm pretty darn sure he likes me, but I don't think he's actually looking for any sort of solid relationship.
I'd talk to him about it directly, but I just can never muster the courage or find the right time.
It's that horrible not knowing for sure that kills me. I want to be able to call him sweet nicknames and do relationship stuff,
But I don't want to ruin what we do have going if he's not interested or ready.
If I knew for sure whether or not he's interested it'd be so much easier,
I could just move on or actually be comfortable being as sweet as I want with him or date him.
We've known each other for 6 years and we're close as biscuits and butter, not even including the flirty business we've got going...
You'd think this would be easier.
How do I even go about talking to him about all of this?

[SlendyProxy]

My boyfriend and I are a long distance couple --
but we have been together for an entire year (on the 26th)

I love him -- and we talk about marriage, kids, etc. So far as wedding rings
I know it is early; I mean I'm a year from 18 and he is going to be 20; but I
can't think of anyone else I would rather spend my whole life with.

However I am worried... he's not a virgin like I am;
and I know he is going to want to do things with me
but the thing is I'm so insecure and am slowly getting
used to my real life friends hugging me. I don't feel ready
and I told him; he told me he wouldn't pressure me but
he would be disappointed... which makes me feel guilty
like I have to; or he won't be happy..

How should I tell him that I feel like I have too?

Ok so my bff was talking to my crush (her ex) and was gonna ask him out for me but she said that she couldn't do it. Now it's all up to me over asking him out or not. I can't do it either though, I'm way too scared and nervous, plus I dunno how to say it and word it. It's kinda confusing now because obviously she's not fully over the breakup. She's like a sister to me and I would never hurt her like that by asking him out but I really like him also. Ugh, this is really hard and confusing. I don't want to like him if she can't take it but I can't just suddenly stop my feelings for him. She wants to make a truce saying that we both just stay friends with him but I dunno if I can do that. Omg relationships are hard and I hate them now kinda. Well, there goes yet another stupid crush.. She says I can still like him just not date. Yeah, how will that kinda work out? I'm just not in a very happy mood right now...

...Yes she is your best friend; and you are right you cannot just stop your feelings for him. If this was me; I would survey how much I knew personally about this guy, how much we hung out, how much we got along. Sometimes I feel like our friends love someone or did love someone and the light they put them in when talking about them -- makes you want that too. So when they break up you're stuck with mixed feelings about the guy because what she had told you prior made you want him; now he is single.
...The best things to do in this situation in my opinion is distance yourself from him if you aren't close or don't talk. Just try not to think about it but keep this in mind; What happens, happens. If you and the guy are close and you like him for who he is and not what your friend told you then don't shove him away. If you did end up dating him and your best friend is like your sister she would understand and back off as long as you are happy.
...Also, it's never a good idea to ask someone to ask out your crush if it is there ex. It can hurt them if they aren't completely over that person. Apologizing to your friend and hugging her to tell her that you're sorry you put her through that may or may not be neccessary. Personally, I would do that but that is because I always try to please others due to my pyschology background and think of things in a non-bias(I don't take sides) way.

...The main thing to just keep in mind is like I said; What happens, happens and your friend if she is a true friend will support you through anything. Likewise however try not to talk about how great he is in front of her or things of that nature. That can hurt her heart about their break up and cause tension between you two. I wish you the best of luck and if you need any help feel free to PM me any time. My inbox is always open to anyone <3

Okay he probably only disappointed because he may want to make love with you okay but he is happy to wait for you to be ready only do it when you want to but he is not a virgin so making him wait for you may end up you losing him, some guys like to have a sex life and I doubt he is using you for sex

[malteser]

I'm kinda thinking of asking my crush out on a date, but I'm so confused about the dating stuff. Do you date when you are a couple or before you are a couple? I haven't even confessed, and I guess a date would seem better for me then openly confessing...but idk how the whole "dating things" work.

And I don't even know what you exactly do on dates. -_-

Well, If you aren't together yet I guess you sorta have to GET TOGETHER XD
But just spending time with him with some of his friends and some of your friends, THATS when you can make your move.
I guess you'd ask them if they'd go out with you first but, get to know them better XD

[ExplodingInk]

Okay he probably only disappointed because he may want to make love with you okay but he is happy to wait for you to be ready only do it when you want to but he is not a virgin so making him wait for you may end up you losing him, some guys like to have a sex life and I doubt he is using you for sex

I never said I wouldn't, I am saying I am not ready. There is nothing wrong with that and if any guy left me for that I would pack their bags for them. Sex is not everything; even though I am not uptight about it but the main point is our relationship is long distance. We have never even kissed; so I am finding it hard to want to make that jump when I first see him.

/Sigh.
Flirtationships are the worst thing in the world...
I'm pretty darn sure he likes me, but I don't think he's actually looking for any sort of solid relationship.
I'd talk to him about it directly, but I just can never muster the courage or find the right time.
It's that horrible not knowing for sure that kills me. I want to be able to call him sweet nicknames and do relationship stuff,
But I don't want to ruin what we do have going if he's not interested or ready.
If I knew for sure whether or not he's interested it'd be so much easier,
I could just move on or actually be comfortable being as sweet as I want with him or date him.
We've known each other for 6 years and we're close as biscuits and butter, not even including the flirty business we've got going...
You'd think this would be easier.
How do I even go about talking to him about all of this?

If you have a flirtation - use that as leverage. Get more serious -- lovey flirtations going. Compliment him, show him that you are interested :3 That is the easiest way without having to do the direct jump first thing. It brings people together the sweet simple things -- that make us all happy. He might even surprise you and make the jump first and ask you out. You can always PM me if you have any trouble or need further advice my inbox is always open <3

[Akele]

Okay he probably only disappointed because he may want to make love with you okay but he is happy to wait for you to be ready only do it when you want to but he is not a virgin so making him wait for you may end up you losing him, some guys like to have a sex life and I doubt he is using you for sex

I never said I wouldn't, I am saying I am not ready. There is nothing wrong with that and if any guy left me for that I would pack their bags for them. Sex is not everything; even though I am not uptight about it but the main point is our relationship is long distance. We have never even kissed; so I am finding it hard to want to make that jump when I first see him.

There certainly is nothing wrong with waiting. C: It is best for you to be sure about it before you take such a big step.
My best advice would be to tell him the truth: that you're not ready. Understand he probably can't help it if he feels disappointed, because he is ready for such a thing, and likes you, and wants to be with you. I can't emphasize this next point enough: Don't let that make you feel guilty. The two of you are simply at different levels of what you're ready for in regards to intimacy. That''s completely natural, as not everyone moves at the same pace, and anyone worth their salt will both understand your decision, and respect it as well. C: Like you said, intimacy is not the most important part of a relationship. Trust, respect, and open paths of communication are vital to romantic relationships, and it's much better for you guys to be open and honest with each other about this issue than to stay silent.

I hope that helps.

[MoBo]

i am so heartbroken.. i made the mistake in my relationship so its all my fault... but i love this guy so much. i need tpo get over him. i thought i was but i guess not.. what thhe heck do i do... :'( </3

Here's what you do:
1. Go cry your heart out. It helps, I swear.
2. Release any other emotions you felt when with him: anger, confusion, frustration.
3. Surround yourself with your friends and family. They will help you feel a lot better.
4. Break your connections with him. Delete him as a contact on your phone or unfriend him on social media sites.
You would be surprised how quickly you can get over a guy even when you thought it was true love. There are some great links on the front page of this topic, too, solely for this purpose. I suggest looking at them, they helped me get over my first break up. c:
Good luck to you, I hope you feel better soon.

Well, thank you so much for the advice. I want to take a ll of it but me being who I am, will only take half... I want to still talk to him. But if it gets to damaging to my feeling and my heart, I will be done with him.
Again, thank you so much. You're so kind c:

[garnet.]

I know I think this every time that I get a crush, but i think Ive finally found someone i might have a chance with for a relationship
Is that foolhardy or just empty hope?

[blue.roses]

I know I think this every time that I get a crush, but i think Ive finally found someone i might have a chance with for a relationship
Is that foolhardy or just empty hope?

I wouldn't call it foolhardy, because that's just putting down yourself, and you never want to do that.

If you're thinking you two have a chance together because of any of the reasons you can find on a "Does He Like Me" quiz, stop right there. Wait for some concrete information and don't put together a story in yor head. Keep it simple. Think, "I know I like him. I don't know if he likes me." Not - "I know I like him. I'm pretty sure he likes me." This way you won't be disappointed with the outcome.

That being said, don't think "I know I like him. But he would never like me," because that's just depressing. ^^; keep an open mind! Don't focus on hunting him down to be your boyfriend either, just focus more on becoming a better friend of his. At any rate, it's better to be his friend than his girlfriend if you do truly like him. High school relationships don't last. You might end up spending more time with me being his bestie than you will being his girlfriend. <3