Crushes, Boyfriends and Girlfriends | V3

[Kecko]

Hey I would love some advice on this, Heres a code to follow to understand it:

Z: my crush
S: Family Member
K: friend who dated Z
T: another friend who made me think to come here

Ok, so here's the problem. I've had this huge crush on Z for over a year, I see him and talk to him all the time, we'll joke around and even talk about boyfriends and girlfriends. I really like him and the other day he was just staring and smiling at me. I recently learned that Z and K were nolonger dating, and I'm thinking that maybe (it's a huge maybe) that Z and I may go out but I saw T was posting something up about a girl code on if your friends you can't go out with your friend Ex or friends, My question is this, Is this true? When any of you were dating did you follow this "girl code" if not did it ruin a friendship? thank you!

Edit: Just some add ons

Ok thank you! He was talking to her alot but then they just stopped talking, I think her feelings got hurt a week or two ago at a trip we all went on, Z spent time with another girl in our group instead of with K, then K wouldn't hangout with us afterward, so I think that's what happened, thanks again!

Also I didn't know K until she started dating Z, I've known her for probably 2-4 months or so

[FallenSilent]

Well, Kecko.. I'm not exactly sure on the "girl code," but if you want to date Z, you should probably ask K first.. She may think that you don't care about her feelings on it, if you don't. Besides, (And I don't know if it's true.) you don't know why they broke up.. Just my opinion!

[Kecko]

Well, Kecko.. I'm not exactly sure on the "girl code," but if you want to date Z, you should probably ask K first.. She may think that you don't care about her feelings on it, if you don't. Besides, (And I don't know if it's true.) you don't know why they broke up.. Just my opinion!

Ok thank you! He was talking to her alot but then they just stopped talking, I think her feelings got hurt a week or two ago at a trip we all went on, Z spent time with another girl in our group instead of with K, then K wouldn't hangout with us afterward, so I think that's what happened, thanks again!

[FallenSilent]

Ahh, that makes sense! Anytime~ I love helping~

[vanilla kitten]

I NEED MAJOR HELP PLEASE.

So, my crush, T, and I have been spending a lot of time together out of school. [Admittedly, I felt whipped for a little while there. I didn't feel like hanging out with him ;~;] We always chill with my bestfriend and his cousin, R, who's a ninth grader. T and I, though, spend a lot of our time kissing. It's cute, sure, but I feel bad because R's always left out and when I hang out with R, T gets mad. Anyway;
Last Monday, I spent the night [which is nothing new. I spend the night there all the time], like normal. Everything was fine, until we were all going to bed. As always, T kissed me and had his arms around me. Except.. Some stuff happened and let's just say, I'm not proud of it. [Yes, it has to do with virginity. But no, I didn't have sex with him.] And today, and I don't know how, but it started going around my school---with major editing. So, right now, I don't know what to do about this.
Advice??

If you want more information/details, Pm me.

[goat milk]

I'm sad.


I don't know what to do.

I just need plain help.

[Bluebird22]

I have been debating posting on here or not, but after today, I just had to get my feelings out there.

So at my youth group there is this guy J who I really, really like. Back in September I went to this retreat thing with a couple of my friends and J was there also. We sat together, hung out, played jokes on each other, and a whole lot of other stuff. At that retreat is when I got a crush on J. It never went away. At youth group there is a a un-said rule that everyone just hugs, and doesn't shake hands-which means I get to hug J mutable times during yg >:D For awhile it seemed like J liked me too. he would always come up to me and talk, got "mad" at me when I didn't hug him goodbye, etc. it was great. Recently this girl E started to come, and she is really nice, pretty, and funny. A great person in general. But I noticed tonight that J started to flirt with her a lot and it seemed like he felt awkward giving me a hug in front of her. J was also throwing paper airplanes at her pretty often (I don't know what the hell that means). After he walked away a little while later I told E that J was flirting with her pretty much. She didn't believe me, but her friend backed me up saying he defiantly way. To tell you all the truth, I was a little jealous of E. In yg tonight we played this game where you had a few minutes and you had mini Q&As with certain people you picked out. In J and I's session we had a great conversation talking about what were our fears, places we want to visit, and other things. I love spending time with J he is so sweet, funny, nice, and smells /great/. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I should do concerning J? Should I see how it plays out with him and E? I'm really confused about how I should go about things with him. Please help!

Beatles: Do you want some one to PM you about it? Things can be had, and even harder to put in words on a form <3

Shortiee: I feel like the best thing to do with rumors is to tell your closets friends what really happened, so they don't some crazy idea of what happened. then from there, it is pretty tricky.

[s y n]

post one
post two

Lots of confusing stuff going on.

For those of you who haven't read my story/don't remember it, here's the short version: my best friend R, has a crush on me and I don't really know if I feel the same way. That's pretty much the basics of it.

Lots of stuff has happened XD. Yesterday was our "Best Friend Anniversary" because we first met and became best friends on March 19th exactly a year ago. I have no clue how in the world R remembered the exact day we first met and became besties, but he did and that's kinda super adorable. Girls often complain about guys never remembering their birthday/anniversary/etc, but my best friend remembers the exact day that we met, and he's not even my boyfriend.

So, a little while ago, R admitted to me that he has a crush on me, and according to K, he's liked me for almost a year. Yeah. We were talking about having crushes on close friends and he was like, "Well... What if I liked you? Would that be weird?" and I replied, "I don't think so, why?" and he said, "Okay good, because I'm not just saying that. I really do." and it was pretty freakin' adorable.

Anyways, so lots of stuff has happened and such, and last night, R sort of kind of asked me out over text. We were discussing how I wish guys in real life acted all romantic and stuff like guys in movies do, and he said that he knows somebody who'd do that for me and I asked him who and he said himself. The conversation went on a little bit more and then he said, "What if I did that for you? Would you ever consider going out with me?" and I told him that I'd have to think about it for a while and said, "Is that your sneaky way of asking me out?" and he replied, "Lol yeah, it is."

See, the thing is, I'm a bit torn about whether I like him that way or not. I feel like I do, but at the same time, I'm kinda hesitant to date him because we've been best friends for a long time and I think that it'd be kinda weird doing couple-ish things with him, since we don't ever do stuff like that. I'm normally a very affectionate person and I like to cuddle and stuff with my friends, but R's always been an extremely respectful and nice guy and so he isn't really like that, so we don't ever really do anything that could be consider couple-ish, even though everybody thinks we're dating and thinks we belong together. I can't really imagine, like, holding hands with him and kissing him and stuff. It seems weird to me because while I'm very affectionate with all my other friends, he's not really all touchy and stuff like that. He's outgoing and fun and stuff like me, but when it comes to girls, he's kinda shy and awkward and he doesn't have a lot of relationship experience and he's just so super respectful that he just doesn't really act like that. It's not ruining the friendship that I'm afraid of, because I know for a fact that if we dated and ever broke up, we'd still definitely be best friends. I don't know, I think t'd be kinda weird to date him, but maybe if I were to try it, it'd actually not be weird at all. I dunno.

Should I just go for it, give him a chance?

[Saule]

post one
post two

Lots of confusing stuff going on.

For those of you who haven't read my story/don't remember it, here's the short version: my best friend R, has a crush on me and I don't really know if I feel the same way. That's pretty much the basics of it.

Lots of stuff has happened XD. Yesterday was our "Best Friend Anniversary" because we first met and became best friends on March 19th exactly a year ago. I have no clue how in the world R remembered the exact day we first met and became besties, but he did and that's kinda super adorable. Girls often complain about guys never remembering their birthday/anniversary/etc, but my best friend remembers the exact day that we met, and he's not even my boyfriend.

So, a little while ago, R admitted to me that he has a crush on me, and according to K, he's liked me for almost a year. Yeah. We were talking about having crushes on close friends and he was like, "Well... What if I liked you? Would that be weird?" and I replied, "I don't think so, why?" and he said, "Okay good, because I'm not just saying that. I really do." and it was pretty freakin' adorable.

Anyways, so lots of stuff has happened and such, and last night, R sort of kind of asked me out over text. We were discussing how I wish guys in real life acted all romantic and stuff like guys in movies do, and he said that he knows somebody who'd do that for me and I asked him who and he said himself. The conversation went on a little bit more and then he said, "What if I did that for you? Would you ever consider going out with me?" and I told him that I'd have to think about it for a while and said, "Is that your sneaky way of asking me out?" and he replied, "Lol yeah, it is."

See, the thing is, I'm a bit torn about whether I like him that way or not. I feel like I do, but at the same time, I'm kinda hesitant to date him because we've been best friends for a long time and I think that it'd be kinda weird doing couple-ish things with him, since we don't ever do stuff like that. I'm normally a very affectionate person and I like to cuddle and stuff with my friends, but R's always been an extremely respectful and nice guy and so he isn't really like that, so we don't ever really do anything that could be consider couple-ish, even though everybody thinks we're dating and thinks we belong together. I can't really imagine, like, holding hands with him and kissing him and stuff. It seems weird to me because while I'm very affectionate with all my other friends, he's not really all touchy and stuff like that. He's outgoing and fun and stuff like me, but when it comes to girls, he's kinda shy and awkward and he doesn't have a lot of relationship experience and he's just so super respectful that he just doesn't really act like that. It's not ruining the friendship that I'm afraid of, because I know for a fact that if we dated and ever broke up, we'd still definitely be best friends. I don't know, I think t'd be kinda weird to date him, but maybe if I were to try it, it'd actually not be weird at all. I dunno.

Should I just go for it, give him a chance?

I think if you feel like you should, then you should. Or if you're 100% sure you would still be besties and he wouldn't get his heart broken into a million pieces if you decided it didn't work out.
But, really, if you don't feel too much for him, I wouldn't go for it. I mean, I feel like people should date if they're in love. Not just like "sure, I'll give him/her a chance and if it doesn't work out, ehh too bad". Not that this is your situation, just my exaggerated example.
And you guys don't seem like a terribly great match to me, though. If you can't imagine being close with him or even holding hands and stuff. It just doesn't seem like something that would last. And he seems to really care for you, and I think it's better to let him down now rather than kind of drag him along hoping it works out. Not to sound mean or anything, it's just my thoughts on it. And I'm sure other people have entirely different views on this, this is just my perspective. But in the end it's up to you and how you feel inside.
And if you're not your usual affectionate self around him, you may not want to date him because...well, you're not yourself around him.
I think I should just mention that I didn't read your first 2 posts so Idk if I'm missing any information.
Anyways, I don't really know what you should do. Just listen to your heart? What I find helps me, and I'm really indecisive, is I tell myself the world is going to end if I don't choose between whatever I'm choosing between in, like, 10 seconds and sometimes I set a timer. But, yeah, I always end up choosing what I want more or whatever. Maybe that'll help you? Idk. Hopefully something I've said was of some help.
Sorry for the disorganization of this post.
~TWC

[Niverdia]

I'd probably agree about going with your heart about this.

However, recently I had a similar situation, although it was with someone I didn't know well at the time - we've been hanging out through our local dA member group and some weeks ago he admitted he had a big crush on me and asked if we could maybe hang out privately and get to know each other better (in a less creepy way than I'm probably making this sound, ahaha) and although I didn't think much of him and wasn't attracted to him from the get-go, I went along with that. Turns out, however, that he's one of the potentially most compatible people I've ever met, with similar life experiences, interests and a very nice cuddler. I think we might even realistically build a relationship, and I don't think I've ever felt like this (the realistic chance part, that is) about anyone I've had feelings for or have had something going with.

Note that I'm an adult, not a teenager and am currently just rambling about stuff. :u