TheComfortCorner | V.8

[typically,]

ick. Nobody likes me anymore. I have no friends. And it sucks. I just want somebody to talk to.

ilysm. youre my best friend. i care for you so much. <3333

[sinensys]

i hate being such a coward.

i am a senior who moved over the summer to a new school, which i don't really mind because i wasn't really attached to my old one except for my chorus class rip ;.; too much. i had an earth science credit that was considered to be acquired because it was a middle school credit, but this distract doesn't accept it. that's fine; i don't hate that fact in particular, or the fact that i'm in a freshman class, just the teacher.

but my problem lies elsewhere.

there's a junior (i think) in that class as well, and i think he's like me: not really wanting to forcefully be part of someone's life, but still partly wanting to reach out. we sat near each other earlier, but didn't interact much, but on friday when our regular teacher was out, i moved to be away from the loudest and most obnoxious group that had gathered over near i was assigned to be sitting, so i moved to an empty spot near him. i hadn't planned it, but it was a fairly quiet corner, which was what i needed when i feared a migraine was coming on. he did some things he hadn't done earlier a little after i had moved over there, like click with his pen (something in that class i was almost notorious for) and sigh a lot as we individually did a filler assignment that was supposed to be group work, but wasn't hard as much as it was just boring and tedious. i thought about also reaching out, but i genuinely suck at initiating contact with someone if it isn't project related. i'm great at continuing and active listening, but not at initiating. i'm too much of a coward. it's not even like a fear of rejection, i just genuinely don't want to tread on people's toes or force myself into a conversation needlessly if i wasn't called upon to join.

i hate it. this is more of a rant, but if you have similar fears and tips on dealing with that or tips on starting conversation that isn't exactly random but isn't 100% task related, i'd appreciate it.

[skyline]

why do i care so much about what other people think? it kills me
i'm pathetic

[waggy]

Just wanted to spill my feelings, please ignore.

I’m so scared.
I’m coming out today and i’m scared that they wont take it well,
I’m scared of having a panic attack in class when thinking og what my mum will do
I’m scared that I’m faking dysphoria.

It’s an awful feeling,to doubt yourself.
I do hate all the female parts of my body.I hate when people call me ‘woman’ or ‘lady’.I get unbelievably happy and my heart races when someone calls me ‘dude’ or ‘sir’,I feel butterflies to my stomach and I think about it all day.
But what if im faking it?
What if I made myself think that I have dysphoria,when I don’t?
What if all the panic attacks and cringing when i touched my body by accident were all staged?
What if,when I came out to myself,all the tears (and even smiles that I figured myself out) were fake?
Maybe I’m faking the nights where I cried and cried and cried because I just wanted to be a cis male.
Or the days where I felt nothing but warmth when someone accidentally called me a boy.

[anxious ghost]

i feel so alone. all the time. i'm so tired. tired of fighting with depression. it's hard to leave my room anymore. even when i'm out having a good time, it's like there's this cloud hanging over me. i'm so tired. my meds are helping for my manic episodes but doing nothing for the depression. i'm tired.
my only friend, we talk maybe two to four times a month, maybe. i have my mom and sister, but they're family. i only have one friend and i barely talk to them because of their schedule. my therapist wants me to make friends but i'm not in school, and my area doesn't have any groups that i can go to. i need a friend, but they seem so scarce these days.

[cornspurrd.]

.

[kitty teeth]

Maybe I should just get my G.E.D. I might just be better off than becoming a super senior.

[prisms.]

Looks like I'm back uh please ignore if you want
I want to help
but I don't know how
What if I mess up?
I need to do something
but
how


also, note to self, please try to be more productive

[Valac]

I have to make a big decision and my brain literally can't handle it. I feel so sick aargh. Why do I have to make things so hard for myself ;-;

[beebopbee]

go go go away please cant i just tske a glance or two or three please wothout theawfuld stares and could novisy carw wan we coyld juat talj??