TheComfortCorner | V.8

[Rose Gold <3]

My friend probably thinks that I'm doing way better, that I'm over him (different person). But I'm not sure I am, I suppress all of my feelngs & push them to the back of my mind because I'm happier when I'm not thinking about him. But when I do think about him, I get so depressed. Why did my heart choose him out of all people to crush on? I haven't heard from him in a month & I've been absolutely crushed.

[Thebattleangel]

honestly im just depressed, i feel like im not good enough, that im not good at what i enjoy...

[~ moth ~]

i'm just feeling super anxious and worried. i recently had my birthday a few weeks ago and since then i'm of legal age in my state to get my licence as well as a job. so my mom has been up my butt about getting both. everyday she asks me "fill out any applications yet?" "you gonna start reading that drivers manual?" " you gonna find a job soon?" "when are you gonna get your drivers permit?" and she's really stressing me out. i live with anxiety disorders. i for sure know that i have a severe case of social anxiety and possibly a mild case of generalized anxiety. ontop of that i'm super introverted ,, am socially inept ,, and horribly shy. so her breathing down my back about this stuff everyday is really getting to me. i don't think she understands how much she is freaking me out. then to add on i applied to a movie theater nearby cuz i don't think that i'll have to do much social interaction there. but apprently the threater is going to call me to set up an interview. now i'm dreading that phone call. i'm just really freaking out cuz social interaction scares the hell out of me. i can't sleep. it's three in the morning as i write this. i have an anxiety headache. my stomach is churning and i feel like i'm going to throw up. i'm crying too. i don't know how i'm ever gonna get through in life if i can't even manage a simple phone call. i just need a hug.

[Clarrissa]

i'm just feeling super anxious and worried. i recently had my birthday a few weeks ago and since then i'm of legal age in my state to get my licence as well as a job. so my mom has been up my butt about getting both. everyday she asks me "fill out any applications yet?" "you gonna start reading that drivers manual?" " you gonna find a job soon?" "when are you gonna get your drivers permit?" and she's really stressing me out. i live with anxiety disorders. i for sure know that i have a severe case of social anxiety and possibly a mild case of generalized anxiety. ontop of that i'm super introverted ,, am socially inept ,, and horribly shy. so her breathing down my back about this stuff everyday is really getting to me. i don't think she understands how much she is freaking me out. then to add on i applied to a movie theater nearby cuz i don't think that i'll have to do much social interaction there. but apprently the threater is going to call me to set up an interview. now i'm dreading that phone call. i'm just really freaking out cuz social interaction scares the hell out of me. i can't sleep. it's three in the morning as i write this. i have an anxiety headache. my stomach is churning and i feel like i'm going to throw up. i'm crying too. i don't know how i'm ever gonna get through in life if i can't even manage a simple phone call. i just need a hug.

i feel your pain; I'm in a similar situation right now. My mum keeps dropping hints about me getting a summer job and while I really like the idea of earning something for myself, I don't know if I can get over the anxiety block. Like, having to smile and greet random strangers as they enter a coffee shop or takeaway and having them judge me just feels completely out of my comfort zone.

Maybe you could try talking to your mum or another family member/friend about it? If that's not an option (i know it can be hard talking to someone if they don't understand anxiety) then I wish you the best luck with everything. I've had a few interviews before (mostly in school but still) and it helped to remind myself that it'll be over soon and that it's more than likely that the person interviewing me will have forgotten about anything embarassing I did during the interview by next week.

I know me telling you not to worry really won't help but trying to focus on something else while you're waiting for the phone call, like reading a book, listening to music or watching a tv show might help a little to divert your attention from it.

It gets better, I promise.

I hope I was able to help!

[appi]

[Herlock Sholmes]

I kinda just want to get this off my chest and have it organized into words. Excuse the rant.

All my life I've been constantly overshadowed by my twin brother. It seems like he's better than me at pretty much everything except for the arts, social interactions, and common sense. He's a genius at math and science, he can run faster than me, he's better at figure skating, he's won more academic competitions than me, he can play music better than me, etc. When it comes to almost anything I care about, he's better than me at it. You can probably imagine how degrading it would feel to be invested in a bunch of activities your whole life, only to be knocked down by someone better. Constantly. With everything. Now of course, there's always gonna be someone better than me, I get that, but someone as close as my own twin brother, makes me feel like absolute crap. We do the same activities and have the same interests, so he’s always there to be better than me at everything I do. It’s always the same person. When he gets good grades (95% average), everyone's happy and cheering for him. Now while I get good grades (91% average), they're still all below his grades, so no one gives a damn about them. That's just an example of what happens for literally anything. Life feels like I’m climbing a mountain but the only thing I can see in front of me is the back of my brother’s head.

I just hate being under this shadow of him and I’m incredibly frustrated. It’s diminishing my morale - I can never feel like I’m good at anything. Oh and as a bonus: He’s the family favourite. Yep. After how friendly I am, after all the work I do around the house, after all the jokes I crack, and having a decent personality, my brother is smarter so he’s the favourite child. Just like that. My parents constantly say stuff like “Why can’t you be more like your brother?” “Your brother is going to have a good future but you’re going to be homeless.” etc.

Yea

[yuzima]

I. AM. GOING. TO. THROW. UP

[Jodjo]

i dont know why i thought that next school year was going to be any different. idk why i thought it was going to be better.
i saw a lot of people from school today and although i enjoyed some of their company, others i didnt and i went to my 'school persona' for people i dont really know/i am on the verge of disliking. idk.

[v1s10ns]

.

[Athaerys]

No need for a reply, but if you want, go ahead.

I called it, I freaking called it. It hasn't even been a month and everything is going to hell once again. It's how all of us function after all. Ones inactive, another is facing their demons, ones struggling with money, then theres me being the odd one out who has Aspergers which none understand how to deal with. You would think that it would have happened sooner, but no. All of us are too stubborn to actually try and make sure things don't go to hell for the umpteenth time. I don't know how much longer any of us can last, and that's what's killing me slowly. Is trying to just help not enough now? Is caring not needed anymore? I'm running out of things to try, and I'm running out of time. None of us are going to last much longer, I can feel it in the weird way I feel everything. No one is going to last much longer and there's nothing I can do. That hurts the most, being useless but getting used to it seems to be the only thing I can do now. Is bringing up what needs to change not enough? Is letting words left unsaid the only thing left? Because damn we do that plenty enough as it is, with the constant tension and hatred we have for each other but never speak it in fear of more chaos consuming us all. I'm losing everything again, alright. Every inch of progress we made, every happy moment, everything basically. Alright, it's time to block the pain in my heart again and delay another anxiety attack.

I'm okay. I'm always okay. I'm just going to play Binding of Isaac: Rebirth to distract myself, alright. Good plan.