♥Crushes, Boyfriends, and Girlfriends | V6♥

[Blueberry]

Ah, romantic problems. Problems, that I’m apparently incapable of solving.

To start off, there’s a boy. We’ll call him J. J is both the most talkative and taciturn person I know. He’s great, to be honest. He’s funny (Well, not that funny, but him laughing at his jokes is funny.) I recently started texting him. It’s easy to text him and he’s usually generous with his responses and we are capable of holding conversations for hours. With that being said, I noticed that I typically almost always have to initiate the conversations. Lets say I message him at 11pm and sustain a conversation with him for a couple hours. The next day, he might message me something that’s relevant to our previous conversation - however, that’s far and few between. I noticed he won’t establish a conversation if our last one was more than 24 hours ago. So, I usually have to text first. It’d be easier to discern if I was bothering him if his responses were more vague and short, but they aren’t. He behaves in a way that appears as though he enjoys my company, but he never initiates conversations!


Any & all help is greatly appreciated

[wittebane]

I don't really know how to explain the way I'm feeling. All of my close friends are obsessing over boys and girls and I am not really feeling that way about anyone. Sometimes I try to force myself into crushing on someone so I can seem normal around my friends. Do you think I will ever change? I'm just really confused...

don't worry yourself any, there's nothing wrong with you at all! there's a couple things that could be causing it, and neither of them mean that there's a single thing amiss with you. firstly, you might just not have hit the point in your life that romance is of interest to you. for some people, they start to think about it as soon as they're exposed to the concept. in other cases, it takes a bit of time, sometimes even past the "normal" point that everyone around them is starting to become interested in it. other times, though? there's people who never end up interested. and there's nothing wrong with that! romance isn't for everyone, regardless of how much society tries to force it on all of us. for some people, that means that they just have no interest in a relationship. for others, it means that they can't, and never will, feel romantic attraction to anyone. there's nothing wrong with them, either. romance is not the only way you can find fulfillment in your life, and a romantic partner is not the ultimate goal for every living person. don't force yourself to do anything you don't want to do. if your friends think you're weird for not having a crush on anyone, i promise they're the ones who are strange and out of line. if they try to coerce you into a relationship just to satisfy their own weird need to ""see you happy"", as some people put it, then that is entirely unnecessary and you would not be acting unreasonable to call them out on putting their own desires above your feelings.

my personal recommendation (anyone is free to give their own, of course!) is that you not force anything. don't force yourself into a relationship you don't want, and you don't have to try to convince yourself you have feelings that aren't there, either. look into things like aromanticism, but don't force yourself to adapt that label or any other if it doesn't seem right. any choices regarding your relationships or your identity should not be made by other people, or truthfully even be influenced by them. take your feelings about the matter seriously, but also give yourself room and time to expand your worldview. read about other people's experiences with this kind of thing, too! you will come to understand yourself better with time. be willing to allow yourself that time of introspection when you need it. in the meantime, though? enjoy yourself! enjoy new experiences and hobbies and places and friends. don't worry about hypothetical relationships you may or may not someday have. put yourself and the now above all else.

[sweetsakura]

Ah, romantic problems. Problems, that I’m apparently incapable of solving.

To start off, there’s a boy. We’ll call him J. J is both the most talkative and taciturn person I know. He’s great, to be honest. He’s funny (Well, not that funny, but him laughing at his jokes is funny.) I recently started texting him. It’s easy to text him and he’s usually generous with his responses and we are capable of holding conversations for hours. With that being said, I noticed that I typically almost always have to initiate the conversations. Lets say I message him at 11pm and sustain a conversation with him for a couple hours. The next day, he might message me something that’s relevant to our previous conversation - however, that’s far and few between. I noticed he won’t establish a conversation if our last one was more than 24 hours ago. So, I usually have to text first. It’d be easier to discern if I was bothering him if his responses were more vague and short, but they aren’t. He behaves in a way that appears as though he enjoys my company, but he never initiates conversations!


Any & all help is greatly appreciated

hello my dear! To start off, Im Sakura and Its lovely to meet you!

There are many possibilities of what is in his mind right now!
Everyone is unique. Some people are busy, some have more free time! Knowing from my own experiences, boys tend to be more carefree and busy. Of course, i'm not saying everyone is.
If you text him and he texts back politely and as if he enjoys your company, thats a good sign! Don't think that he doesnt like you, and definately don't ask him if he doesnt. That might give him the wrong idea. If he doesnt initiate the conversation himself, he might be shy or he enjoys the fact that you start the conversations! Some guys have a problem where they have no idea what to text someone, whereas some are confident. Not everyone is exactly as they seem! We're all different! Perhaps JJ is shy to text something out of the blue. That should explain why he doesnt text if your last conversation was 24hrs ago! But don't worry!

What I would do:
I would carry on texting and don't worry about it. If you finally get the Confidence to confess, I suggest doing so. But no pressure on you! It's all up to you! Make sure to initiate a friendly conversation in real life! Thats one step to making him like you!

If you only like him as a friend, try and do something together or invite him to a fun place! Experiences bond people closer! 💛

(VERY IMPORTANT:)
Take everything at your own pace.
Remember. You are you. Don't feel pressured to act like others and be yourself! I know for a fact that its better to be yourself and be confident about it! Your real self will eventually come forward in a relationship, so theres no need to hide it! If he likes you. He'll like the REAL you. If he doesnt, theres no need to change to his expectations!

[-Blufox]

ughhhh

last year in school i feel like i caught the attention of some boys. they never flirted with me but they kept looking at me. i don't want this. next year i think they might throw a pickup line or something at me. i'm lesbian, so if a girl did this i'd be fine. but if one of them asks me out i'm not sure what i'll do. i don't want to stress over this the entire summer so any help is appreciated c:

[grayce!]

so uh... my crush is always flirting with me. calling me cute pet names and i do the same. we have established that we have feelings for each other... but he wants to wait about another 3 months to year.... and im just worried another girl is gonna get to him first? it seems selfish... to me at least... to be mad that another girl could have him. help?

[Shiny Sylveon]

Realising I may have actually partially friendzoned my crush a year ago ohmydays aha. Pssh nevermind, I know now that it wouldn't have worked out so I guess it's better this way. XD
Still, avoiding multiple acts of kindness and chivalry was a pretty stupid move, you butt. Damn it Becca.

Oof, saaame. He asked me out to a Valentine's day school dance, and I said no because I (stupidly) thought he meant we'd be going as friends. And then there's the time we spent the whole day together (alone) at King's Island on a school field trip...I am one oblivious walnut. Nothing like accidentally friend-zoning your crush, am I right? xD

[autumnsoundtrack]

this is all water under the bridge now! no need for help

[angelfangs]

So I've been with my boyfriend for 7 months now. Last night I got a bit drunk and texted my "ex" for pretty much a "booty call". Except I had zero intention of going through with it, I just wanted to see if he'd respond 'yes' and intend to cheat on his current girlfriend (again) and prove to my friends that he's a scumbag. I know I would never ever do that to my boyfriend because he's the only person I love, but for some reason I feel guilt about it despite having absolutely no intention to go through with it? Am I a bad person for this? Because I'm starting to feel like a bad person.

hey boo! i think your boyf would probably feel really hurt that you did this behind his back. even with intentions of not going through, it would still hurt his feelings if he found out. i don't think you're a bad person or that you should be guilty, but if you're gonna do something like that (cuz dang i would wanna know too) i would do it with your boyf there. ya'll would probably get a kick out of it together!

[hatsune mewku]

I confessed to my crush who is also my best friend tonight and I regret it. He said he likes me back. I don't believe him. He said that if a dude who likes guys comes to our school, he'll try to date him. If not, he'll date me. Is it bad I'm really angry I'm his "back-up" plan? He even said himself I'd be his "go-to". I just want to die. It was so awkward between us when we were talking in discord with our other two friends. I feel so embarrassed I did it. I wish this never happened. I wish it were all a dream. I can't stop crying. Maybe sleep will help. I have no idea what to think.

[wittebane]

I confessed to my crush who is also my best friend tonight and I regret it. He said he likes me back. I don't believe him. He said that if a dude who likes guys comes to our school, he'll try to date him. If not, he'll date me. Is it bad I'm really angry I'm his "back-up" plan? He even said himself I'd be his "go-to". I just want to die. It was so awkward between us when we were talking in discord with our other two friends. I feel so embarrassed I did it. I wish this never happened. I wish it were all a dream. I can't stop crying. Maybe sleep will help. I have no idea what to think.

i'm so sorry that this turned out so badly for you. in my opinion, the way that he reacted is absolutely uncalled for, and there is no way that i, with my outside and limited perspective, can justify it. you should never feel forced to accept being anyone's 'back-up plan'. you are worth much more than being someone's 'second choice'. the level of disrespect he has shown you in those statements is not something you should just take without any kind of remorse or apology on his part. the fact that he says he likes you, but would rather date some theoretical guy that he's never met before having a relationship with you? that's putting you in a position to wait for him, potentially missing out on other relationships that could be better for you. that's not okay, or at the very least, not a kind or considerate thing to do. i don't mean to trash talk someone i don't know, especially considering you think of him as your best friend, but i really think that there is something fundamentally wrong with his behavior in this situation. perhaps he was trying to spare your feelings by giving you a sort-of 'maybe', but that doesn't make it any less hurtful to have been told on your part. if you can, i think you should bring it up with him again, this time from the perspective of how his reaction to your confession hurt you. try not to present it in a way that makes him feel like you're trying to force him into a relationship with guilt, of course. but make sure he at least knows that he hurt you. if he refuses to apologize or even acknowledge that he was wrong, you can decide how you want to proceed from there. but take care of yourself, no matter what you choose to do!