by Hanoverian » Wed Sep 12, 2012 11:55 am
I live right by the Budweiser Clydesdales. C:
It's a long story.
But pretty much, I won't be riding Kat. Like hardly at all.
...
My trainer thinks that I'm not learning enough from him. We had originally thought at the beginning of summer (I was schooling him 2' then) that I would be able to do 2'6 on him in the fall and then bump up to 2'9-3' next summer if things went well.
Well, they didn't go well. Things went downhill instead of up. Yes, we've had our good moments, yes, we've had our breakthroughs... yes, I love him and he loves me. He's taught me things and I've taught him things - and he's come a long way since the beginning of summer - but it's just not... going all that well. He's green, he's still green, he's inconsistent even though my trainer says that I've been doing the right things... every day is a different Kat, every day a different ride, and I can ride him effectively now (for the most part) but I just can't get where I need to be with him.
Trainer says that he won't be ready to show or jump over X's for a good amount of time due to various reasons.
She says that I should be showing the 2'6. Says that she wishes that I already was. But I can't get there with Kat, and I've been left behind in a bit of a rut all summer, stuck on the flat, maybe doing an X, dealing with his issues, trying to work out mine on a horse that challenges me just because of our builds.
I'm trying the new Trakehner tomorrow, and we're getting in a new Westphalian soon that my trainer also wants me to try.
So yes, I'm kinda upset. I spent my WHOLE SUMMER with this horse, I put my heart and soul into him, I love him, I trust him... but we're just not RIGHT for each other.
You've all seen how he screws my equitation up, and actually, I'm happy for that, because whenever I sit on another horse, it's easy. Maybe not "perfect" but honestly, none of our Eq is perfect, not Dolphin, Rain, myself, George Morris, Beezie madden, etc... I'm thankful for Kat because he has made the average horse easy.
But I love him. But we're just not right. But I love him... he loves me.
I just don't know what I want to do - stick with a horse that I adore but I can't improve on, or move on and start doing more advanced things that I should've already been doing. I don't want to give up my first true horsey love, but I also want to reach my goals.
...I just want a horse of my own.