Jellybean Dragon Fanclub (JBDFC) Open!

[Kawartsii]

*yawns* oh god. I had the worst sleep.
I was think of #287 way too much. I'm not where near complete of my form with the story and drawings D:

[Syra]

*yawns* oh god. I had the worst sleep.
I was think of #287 way too much. I'm not where near complete of my form with the story and drawings D:

Ugh! I had a nightmare last night that I lost him.
;^;

I was crying really hard in my dream because, even though he isn't my dream JBD, I still really love him. After all, he is so amazing I never could have even dreamed him up myself for him to be my dream JBD. I love him more than my dream JBD...
;3;

[SubtleBurn03]

Could someone possibly give me some more crit? All of these forms are great but nerve-wracking -le sigh-

Link

[c h r i s t m a s]

So I didnt win bean from batch 3 ;n; ya huh wow...
But anyways I won my first Adoptable ^.^ a Kiamara <33
Aquo. <33
Anyways ya I'm dropping out of 287... I hope theres a new JBD soon ^.^

[Lucy.]

Could someone possibly give me some more crit? All of these forms are great but nerve-wracking -le sigh-

Link

I think it is good, but the part in the story that is

He was in his mid teens whenever he left his job as a blacksmith's assistant and went into work at a factory.

and

He dodged one but whenever he tried to get through the second one, his paw got stuck and the gas ignited from the heat gathering up in the room.

The word whenever should probably be changed to the word when. If you really would like to keep it like that, then that's okay, but it is proper to have when, and it sound better ^^

[Sable.]

oh well another bean lost ;n;
I'm glad he went to a good home though.

[Green Arrow]

I'll do a fullbody commish of any JBD(s) for only 6 dA points. I'm almost finished smoke's art, but I desperately need these points to purchase a character ^^

[Lucy.]

Does anyone else have like a sheet of paper just of good JBD names.....

I hope i'm not the only one >o<

[berceuse]

Could someone possibly give me some more crit? All of these forms are great but nerve-wracking -le sigh-

Link

I think it is good, but the part in the story that is

He was in his mid teens whenever he left his job as a blacksmith's assistant and went into work at a factory.

and

He dodged one but whenever he tried to get through the second one, his paw got stuck and the gas ignited from the heat gathering up in the room.

The word whenever should probably be changed to the word when. If you really would like to keep it like that, then that's okay, but it is proper to have when, and it sound better ^^

As far as I'm aware the second one is correct, no need to take away the 'ever' off of it.

To add to the criticism I find your sentences hard to read, because they are switching from subjects, making the reader a bit confused what you're talking about.

Like for example:

"He was in his mid-teens whenever he left his job as a blacksmith's assistant and went into work at a factory."

I have no idea what you're talking about, so then I'm missing some 'pieces' from the story. ;3

I do actually have a list of names, but I wouldn't share them. ;3;

[euro22]

Does anyone else have like a sheet of paper just of good JBD names.....

I hope i'm not the only one >o<

Yes XD
Only me and lady obvious know of it

I am not the only one???????????????????//