i'm very gay, i'd like a few dollars

[zhongluc]

i can't believe it's national girlfriend day and i don't have a girlfriend to shower in affection


this is also still a mood. every day is national girlfriend day in my heart yet i still don’t have a girlfriend to shower in affection. but that’s okay! maybe someday

[zhongluc]

i hope i can get rats


exactly a month after posting this, i got rats :’’’)))

[zhongluc]

i feel like my identity has been stolen because my old instagram username is in use again


HDJDJDFD this is a mood though i just got so uncomfortable remembering that it’s in use again. that was my username for a long time !!! it’s weird thinking it applies to someone else now

[zhongluc]

that i hate u i love u song except it's i love u i love u

[zhongluc]

O, woukd you loonked at the time, it is currently NOW

[zhongluc]

i've been insecure about my voice since the time when i was 11 and on a skype call with my friends and their sister walked in, heard me speak, and then said "sounds like a man." since then i've spoken in this Anxiety Voice that's ten times higher than my actual voice and i can't yell or anything because then it starts getting even higher (that's not a huge issue because i also just can't bring myself to speak loudly i just can't be loud). my actual voice only happens 1) when i'm talking to my family and i'm completely relaxed or 2) when it's really late and i'm half asleep. when i speak with my normal voice it's like all scratchy too? from disuse maybe? and that makes me even more nervous about it. idk i hate both my actual voice and my anxiety voice, i'd rather not talk ever


i’ve been thinking about this again lately

[zhongluc]

im shaking in my star wars pajama pants

[zhongluc]

sorry i’m out here crying because this year i finally became more confident in myself and started loving my body and i’ve been wearing the clothes i’ve always wanted to wear but was never confident enough to wear like i actually wore shorts and sleeveless shirts this summer i’ve literally never done that i always just wore short sleeves and whatever pants i had and if i was hot i suffered y’know? but this year i was finally able to dress for the weather and i’m just. i did that. and i’m out here starting to wear dresses and skirts? and not hating myself for every second? i tried on that skirt at forever 21 and i was so happy and i loved it i thought i looked cute and that’s ... new to me. i only ever wore skirts and dresses when i was little but then from like 7 until earlier this year i would never in a million years consider wearing a dress or skirt. half because i hated my body and half because i’m trans and it bothered me but now i just .... i like it. i think i look cute and i enjoy wearing the one dress i have. and i’m even wearing different styles of shirts not just plain tshirts? i’m just proud of myself i guess oh man


i’m still ... really proud of myself in this regard. i really just wear whatever i want to wear now, and that amazes me! i wear crop tops now without even thinking about it? that’s shocking! i wouldn’t have imagined even going near a crop top 2 years ago. even jeans were a stretch back then! brightly coloured things? pants that weren’t leggings? tops that weren’t baggy sweatshirts? none of that felt possible and now here i am. i’m just ... comfortable wearing whatever i feel like wearing. and it makes me so happy

[zhongluc]

im really .... so blessed to have the friends that i have. today was really bad but i don’t feel as bad anymore because of them

[zhongluc]

who is this actual man and why is he trying to slide into my dms. i’m shaking i’m so uncomfortable