[corrosive_limes]

I need to run it through some tests and then it will be a species. I need CRITISICM AND COMMENTS. Preferably criticsm


Cosmic Runners are somewhat deer like. The y have antlers and hooves, but they also have griffon claws and a long furry tail. The little orbs floating around their hind legs and tail are tiny stars, they are also very fast, hence the name, Cosmic Runners. The eat fish, berries, grasses of certain types, and the occasional small rodent. They are about the size of a large draft horse and many times stronger. Their eyes are large and take much of their face because they are mainly nocturnal. Their fur and hide is very soft and poachers kill them for their silky fur. Their fur has a long smooth texture much like silk, its thickest on the back and tail. They posses antlers that are many times harder and sharper than the hardest rock, once again, making people poach them for their antlers. Those are the facts, were switching over to myth now.

Cosmic runners are said to be intelligent beings not found in this world. They came from distant stars, and each one controlled their own star, the essence of which can be found in their orbs. They possess fur of the finest silk and antlers stronger than steel. They can weild untold magical abilities and are incredibly strong. They gallop about the cosmos, settling battles and keeping the peace, until they landed here. A unique few branched off into their own kind of Cosmic Runner. These beasts had thick, silky fur, antlers harder then normal, Incredible magic, astounding strength, and many other qualities the other simply did not possess. They settled here on earth and lived in peace, until now. We now transition back to fact.

Now poaching has dwindled their numbers, and made them few and far between. It used to be you could see them walking through the streets. Now, the streets are deathtraps. They are so far a non-protected species, meaning, you can kill them on sight with no fine. They will die out soon, and there are few safe havens for them, but here is said to be one of them. You can see them come here, to be kept safe because some few people have finally started to see how they control the earth, keeping it from collapsing in on itself.


They are still a wip. I need to get critic and comments, i would very much appreciate critique though. Thanks for reading this!

[akb48]

Very cute!

[corrosive_limes]

Thanks <3

[duhl]

Very cool owo

[corrosive_limes]

Thank you. Any ideas on how i could improve them?

[allynabean]

Thank you. Any ideas on how i could improve them?

Well, I'm no expert but...
I think the lines should be a bit thinner, the mane/hair/tail fluff should probably be less zig zaggy and more smooth fluff...

[corrosive_limes]

I mean as a species, but i will keep that in mind c:

[Ohdeerieme]

They're really cute, though the little orb things on its flank seem a bit off to me. ^^

[corrosive_limes]

Can you go a bit more in depth than that so I know how to fix it?