[MistCreek]

The second part of my story. (Thanks to those of you who commented on the first!) Please take a look at my first one. Any ideas to make this better?------------
The two wolves stared at each other, suprised and confused. Ashia noticed that this wolve's fur was slightly matted and his stance was more of an Omega (lowest ranking wolf of the pack). He looked away first and instead set the fish down slowly. Ashia lifted her tail as an Alpha would and waited for him to make the first move.
..Ash glanced up at the beautiful she-wolf, his eyes wary. Would she hurt him as all the others had? If she moved, he would back away a little but still fight. He was born with an Alpha's body but an Omega's heart. But the she-wolf just smiled and said softly, " Well, looks like ya got a good one." Ash cocked his head questioningly and the she-wolf grinned even wider. "The fish?" she said as she slowly sat down. Ash realized what she meant and smiled slightly. "Oh...yeah...um....am I in a pack territory?" The she-wolf looked groomed and healthy, so she couldn't of been much of a loner.
..Ashia hesitated, realizing that he was a loner. "Oh...yes. My pack lives here, actually." The young wolve's eyes got huge and he backed up. Ashia didn't want him to leave, suprisingly. He looked lonely and sick. "Wait!" she said, standing up. The wolf backed up even more, head down. "You look hurt. I'll hunt for you before you leave." She turned away and trotted to a good part of the river and sat, waiting. The wolf came up and cleared his throat. "Uh...thanks." Ashia looked up and smiled at him. "You're welcome."
..Ash looked down and grinned. He sat on the other side of the river and they talked for awhile about small things like prey. Suddenly, a huge brown wolf leaped in front of them, and Ash backed up slowly, eyes wide. The she-wolf looked up and stood beside the large male. They knew each other. The male was snarling now, his hackles raised. "Get away, Omega. This isn't your territory." The she-wolf whispered, "Leave him alone, Rider." But Rider got closer with a sneer on his face.
..Ashia felt shame in leaving the wolf by his self, but she and Rider were friends, and the handsome large wolf was very nice to her.
PLEASE COMMENT

[MistCreek]

Nobody? I was gonna make another one but I need more posts so that I know that it isn't for nothing.

[MistCreek]

Pleez?

[~*BOTDF*~]

i like it! the mood you were trying to get is there

[MistCreek]

Thanks!

[Emma Saige]

No, This is Realy Good! Iv been following it, ust didnt comment on the first, its REALY good!

[MistCreek]

Thanks again! LOL I have to think of a story line. I'll try to post every other day now that school's almost over.

[MistCreek]

One more post and I'll start working on number 3.

[MistCreek]

Done with #3

[Wolfin]

I love it! But on the picture Rider kinda looks happy. Not like 'I caught you now!' happy but 'la la la' happy. Lol.
You could say what they were talking about. It would make it look even longer(and I want to read more)