Hey there, way to go, it looks really nice for your first bird.
Now to the critique for ya.
The nostril is more forward and slitted, and the beak has a slight upward bump close to the feathers (Your head's shape is perfect.). The eye is also up and forward, it's baby or sky blue with a black pupil, and makes a sort of shall we say "eye" shaped indentation in the feathers (Photo below).
Whoever critiqued the neck was incorrect because almost all waterfowl necks come out of the body in a straight line from the backbone and then curve upward and then outward in an "s" shape, especially if they have eaten a lot and have a full crop (The intermediate space between the neck and the stomach where their food is ground up by fine pebbles/glass/whatever they swallow that isn't food.). So, ultimately yours is accurate.
It is a goose by the way, a domestic white Embden goose. If it were a swan, the beak would be either orange or black and longer and narrower. Also the neck would be much longer and more curved.
Domestic Embden Goose
Larger image of same gooseSwans:
You can see by the swan that the "S" shape is much more pronounced, but almost all waterfowl are built that way.
D
