by crabodile » Tue Jan 02, 2018 4:10 pm
dear eun the chin,
agh! my sweet, sweet baby. i know it is really hard for animals to get used to their new homes on christmas. it is hectic and i tried really hard to keep the boys off you. i'm sorry my sister is always trying to hold you and that your cage isn't so great, but i want to say i really do want to try and love you.
you were born on my dog's death date. the same month, day, and year. several people, including my parents, say you are snoopy coming back to me. and i believe them. both of you were introduced into this very house on christmas, both of you are so beautifully calm all the time, although both of you also had these random spurts of annoyance. both of you sleep a lot and then randomly perk up at the weirdest of times, and both of you love burrowing into my neck and the backs of my knees.
it is really hard, you know, seeing you everyday. now that they've got it in my head, i see snoopy in you almost every time i glance your way. the earth wasn't worthy of snoopy and it probably won't be worthy of you, either, but i really hope you come to accept me like snoopy did. i want to be special in your life and i want to care for you, spoil you, make sure you never have to run in one of those evil plastic balls...
ah, but who am i kidding? i'd be lying if i said i hadn't broken down yet. the fears and insecurities you bring with you - ahh, i hope j + a never get impatient with the fact i rant a lot when i'm tired beyond belief and can't sleep. tonight was one of those nights, and i hope i never have to live through any of what i ranted to j about tonight.
lots of love, r
dear a
my beautiful best friend, my sister from another mister (okay what i never in my life would have said that, but i'm tired so eh) i want you to know you mean the world to me and i love you so, so much! i mean, not to scare you away, but you are one of the few people who put up with me and let me snuggle against you (yeah, i have weird habits, thank you for dealing with them) i know right around now life is pretty hard, but it'll get better! although you don't quite believe in heaven and all, i believe gizmo is right up there watching you. i want you to keep living for him and myself and, well, snoopy too of course, whether he is eun now of a spirit up there with ol' gizmo. yeah, maybe not so many people like you and your relationship with.. him.. kind of ended up bad, and you believe you won't ever find love, but i really believe in you and think if you very highly. it gets kind if annoying now and again when you decide to go all korean on me and start using honorifics (they make me feel so old, cry) but it's all fun and games and ends semi-quickly. we don't see each other much anymore but i really do look forward to lunch, err, the lunch line (aud. is a bit to much at the table sometimes..) with you, where we've probably been glared at way too many times. somehow, you always make up a remark when i call my youngest brother marshmallow and one of the kids literally gapes and asks 'why i'm touching that kid'. do we really not look alike? ahh, don't answer that actually, ahha. anyways, i should probably do something else now, but i just needed you to know my whole point here.
i love you to the moon and back. you are my platonic soulmate. i'll always be by your side and i'll never leave you, no matter if you try to force me away or not. we've been through too much, too much to throw away at the snap of some fingers.
so please, whenever you feel worthless, or hated like a rat in a kitchen, please remember that you mean the world to me and that it doesn't really matter what others think, because they call us gay for fun, but if i was a guy you'd definitely be my first partner choice.
wink wink, r