I hate myself.
I just can't keep myself above the strong, rising currents. God it hurts. I can't tell anyone, truly, and I have my reason for doing so, it isn't easy to get help in my situation. I did so much wrong in these past two years, I hate it, I don't want this anymore.
I feel like I can't survive the long weekends alone anymore, and the long week day make me dread getting up. I know Im sinking, but I just gave up trying to swim. I did this to myself, I deserve this.
I need to let go, not of my problems though.